Josie & Will 1.1
I know, it's been a million years since I played this hood. I've had quite a few messages lately from readers saying they love reading these stories, and that they'd like to know what happens next. I wouldn't call them "requests" to play (and if they had been I probably would have ignored them - I don't play families by request) but all the nice comments did make me feel like playing the hood. I guess I can safely tell you all now that the death of Amelie really got me down and temporarily sucked the joy out of this hood for me. Anyway, the fun is back. Hope you guys enjoy.... I would like to apologise for something though - it's been so long since I played this hood, that I've forgotten most of the townies' names. This was made even more confusing by my having deleted a bunch of hairs, so half of them I didn't even recognise!
In our last episode: Josie and Will adopted a "puppy" named Jewel, who turned out to be a scary mutant dog thing, both Josie and Will started their first businesses and the adorable Minnie was born.
Through rain and hail and snow - it makes no difference - there's a business to be run!
Notice the new hood deco at the end of the street? Not so bare now.
Will: "Sure, Marge is just a baby now, but before you know it you'll have to come back here for a bed. Do you really want to be caught unprepared, with your daughter having nowhere to sleep?"
Paula: "Hmm, you make a good point. I'll take it!"
Will's business is doing very well. Nowadays he never has a spare moment at work.
Will: "Picture it - this lovely yellow chest of drawers in your very own home!"
Pretty Townie: *ponders possible purchases oh, so carefully*
Josie: Does he really think I don't notice him sneaking past when there are chamber pots to be emptied?
Will: *thinks himself the King Of Sneaky*
He is a good father, though....
Unfortunately Placed Piece Of Furniture Behind Will: *disguises self as Will's penis, but isn't*
Yeah, I didn't notice this until I'd uploaded the picture and damned if I was going to rename every picture after this just because of that....
This may have been the longest awaited birthday ever! And OMG, those lips! Those big eyes! That adorable nose! *dies*
Minnie: *makes her parallel universe half-sisters Natasha and Carrie Fennell look like Cinderella's ugly stepsisters by comparison*
Minnie grew up gold.
Random stats upon growing up:
Learned to talk from Josie.
Learned to walk from Josie.
Learned nursery rhyme from Josie.
Charisma Points = 1
Minnie: "Uncle Dan still says his daughter is cute... but I'm cuter, right?"
Dan: "My Marge is the most beautiful little girl ever born."
Minnie: "What about you? You think I'm pretty, right?"
God, yes! His Marge will never hold a candle to you, and I know this even though I've no idea how she grows up. You are the single most beautiful little girl I've ever seen, and if I could abduct you from the game and raise you as my own, I totally would.
Pretty and helpful around the house. Even if she does touch the toilet bowl with her bare hands whilst cleaning it....
You washed your hands, right?
Minnie: "D'uh, of course....ummmm....."
Yeah?
Minnie: "Can I maybe clean up all the old baby bottles lying around?"
I freakin' love you!
By the way, there will be a lot of Minnie spam. I couldn't help myself.
Every once in a while...
... the angels create a being of perfection...
... a creature of pure charm and class... a person of grace....
... though perhaps not quite so graceful under pressure...
Josie: "Did you do that...?
Will: "Pfft! Of course not. It was that darn dog. We really need to work on her housetraining."
Minnie: "No more peeing! Knock that crap off!"
Jewel: *grovels under the displeasure of her favourite human in the entire world*
Jolie is one of Josie's most loyal customers. Believe it or not, the two have even become friends despite her having been Finn's mistress all these years...
Will: "This snowman will make the perfect mascot to attract more customers to my business!"
Oh yeah. That guy with his welcoming smile sure makes me want to shop in your store, Will.... *gigglesnort*
Bondage Penguin: "Well hello there, Mr Snowman! You wanna come back to my place? Whips, chains, handcuffs - I'm pretty much up for anything!"
Snowman: "Let's do this thing!"
... and the snowman was never seen nor heard from again.....
(well, okay, actually Will autonomously destroyed him, but I like my imaginary version better...)
Minnie: "My dress is the same color as my school bus. This pleases my sense of aesthetics!"
... and how was your report card today, Miss Sunshine?
Minnie: *tries to hide behind back* "Uhh, they don't give report cards the first day of school...."
Lies!
Awww, the first day of school took a lot out of her....
... still, she eventually made it to bed....
Minnie: "I had a horrible nightmare that my Mommy adopted that creepy doll as her daughter and they roasted me in the oven and ate me for supper!"
Minnie: That nightmare I had earlier will make a really good creative story....
Josie: *is scowltastic* I hate that burglar who stole my piano! Hate her!
Minnie: "Shake hands, Jewel. It's fun!"
Creepy Doll: "Play with me!!!!"
Minnie: *ignores*
Josie: "I wonder if I should close the store for Christmas...." *ponders*
Like all women, Minnie looks her very best in the mornings....
Josie: Huh. I can't even remember the last time I brushed my teeth...
Josie: Brush-a, brush-a, brush-a.....
Josie: "I think I found something - oh, wait - it's just sand...."
Minnie: "Oi, cat! What the heck do you think you're doing? Do you think we're made of umbrellas?"
Kitty: *saddest eyes in all the land*
Jewel: Look master, I'm sitting up!
Minnie: "Hmmm, yeah, that's pretty good... but do you think you could maybe look a little less like you're gonna eat me?"
It always seems like Josie and Will are starving, because as soon as they get home from work they need to eat. Neither of their workplaces has any amenities at all. So as not to distract the consumers from consuming.
Hilda: "What's wrong, Creepy Doll?"
Creepy Doll: "Nobody loves me anymore. It's hard being a creepy doll in this house. I miss my Amelie....."
Josie: "You won't regret the purchase of those floor lights, Dad. You could put them... uhh, oh , I don't know... everywhere if you wanted to."
Finn: "I trust you, honey. If a man can't trust his own daughter, who can he trust?"
Josie: "Not that I mind the custom, but don't you teenagers have more fun things to do than purchase lighting?"
Jewel. She's growing on me.
May I present the win that is Will and Minnie when they're alone together....?
They are very best friends. Will may live a busy life, but he always has time for his only child.
Will: "We'd better stop, sunshine. There's lightning in those clouds and out here on the beach you and I would act as a perfect lightning rod!"
Minnie: "Aww, dad!"
Minnie: "Stupid lightning clouds..." *shakes fist*
Carrie: *spends up big on expensive sofas she doesn't need*
Will: "Pretty lady like you should really have her own vanity. Come on, spoil yourself!"
Carrie: "Okay, okay, you twisted my arm!" *buys it*
Will: "I see you've been admiring the handsome armoire with the heart motif... I recommend you don't think too long. It's been attracting a lot of interest and I guarantee if you hesitate somebody else will snag it. Just think - it could be yours!"
Oh, So Masculine Townie: "Omg, really? It could be mine?" *buys it*
Townie suckers. There's one spawned every minute.
Josie: "You know, there's something about that new girl in town.... she fills me with the most inexplicable feeling of maternal pride.... isn't that strange?"
Customer: "Maybe you knew each other in another life...."
... though the strange new girl in town fills Josie with inexplicable maternal pride, Minnie is having trouble getting Josie to notice she's even alive since she started school....
Creepy Doll: "Josie - you do care!"
Josie: "Of course I do. I've just been busy, you know...."
Minnie: "She loves that stupid doll more than me!"
I know. It makes me sad....
Minnie holds out hope that her mother will notice her, though. Whether it's working on her homework, ballet or her sandcastle building technique, Minnie is always working on self-improvement.
Will: "If you like the recliner, I'd be happy to give you a family discount."
Finn: "It's nice and all... but can you woohoo on it?"
Will: "If I know you, you'll find a way, you old dog!"
Finn: *buys it*
Paula: "Do you think your grandma will come and haunt me for all those times I spied on her with my telescope?"
Minnie: "Don't be silly, Aunt Paula - ghosts aren't real!"
Paula: "... they're not?"
Minnie: "Nope. They're just made up."
Paula: *is rightly dubious*
Carmelita: Did she just hit me with a pillow?
Uh-huh. It's called sisterly bonding. Enjoy it.
Creepy Doll. Hated by children, loved by adults.
Josie: "Well, Paula, you're either pregnant or you have food poisoning..."
Paula: "Not pregnant. What do you do for food poisoning?"
Josie: "Bed rest."
Paula: "Maybe after my ballet practice...."
She's so gonna die!
Josie: "Oh, damn that splashback! This coat is dry clean only!"
Minnie: "Every day in every way, I'm getting better and better!"
That's the spirit!
... though they don't often show it, these two are still as much in love as they were in high school....
Josie: "Are you still here? Out! We are officially closed for the holiday season!"
Anya: Hmph. You just lost a sale.
Yeah, right. You were done shopping - I saw you randomly chatting up younger townie guys....
Random Business Stats:
Harris' New & Used Furniture = Level 9
Let There Be Light! = Level 8
Tune in next time to see if Paula survives, and whether Marge is as pretty as Minnie (though I'm betting not!)