fic; grenade
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Title: Grenade
Pairing: ShigePi, RyoShige
Rating: NC-17
Summary: Yamapi loves Shige more than anything, so why would Shige ever cheat on him, right?
Author’s Note: 2671 words. For the Bunny Meme, originally requested here.
If someone had told him when NEWS was first formed that he’d be in a relationship with Kato Shigeaki, Yamapi’s answer would probably have been, “Who?”
Of course now he definitely knows who Shige is and Shige is more than just a bandmate. Somehow, in the past few years Shige has turned into a friend, a confidant, and now, a boyfriend, a lover. It’s definitely not something Yamapi ever expected, but he can’t say he doesn’t like it. In fact, he’s pretty sure he loves Shige, and is glad to know that Shige loves him back.
They work well together. Shige is grounded while Yamapi is a dreamer and they complement each other that way. Shige is also funny and knows how to have a good time, whether that’s going out for drinks or just lounging at home watching a movie. Yamapi likes Shige because he’s not fussy, he doesn’t have demands and he isn’t clingy. He’s a far cry from any girl Yamapi’s ever dated and it’s this, probably, that makes Yamapi like him all that much more.
But around six months after they start dating, Yamapi notices things changing. Shige doesn’t call him up as much anymore, doesn’t give into Yamapi’s (usually drunken) requests to come over, doesn’t head home with him after work without a word, doesn’t pull Yamapi into an empty dressing room before a concert or after a photo shoot and kiss him senseless. Yamapi is more observant than people give him credit for and he’s certain something is wrong. He doesn’t want to think about it, can’t even fathom the reason why, but it’s there, this little scratch in his mind that begs to be itched.
Other than this though, Shige acts normally. He kisses Yamapi good morning whenever they’re together, he sits next to him during meetings, lets Yamapi put a hand on his thigh under the table, falls asleep sometimes with his head in Yamapi’s lap, and takes candid photos of Yamapi cooking or cleaning around the house with that bright smile on his face.
And Yamapi is content with his life right now, happy, really. He likes bringing Shige home with him after work and pushing him up against the wall in the genkan to kiss the smile off his lips. He likes waking up to Shige making breakfast on a day off in just his boxers. He likes coming over to Shige’s in between photo shoots and crashing on his couch, his head in Shige’s lap while Shige plays with his hair. He likes it when Shige whispers, “Tomohisa,” into his ear as they move together on his bed, fingers touching skin and hearts beating as one.
Yet Yamapi can’t stop himself from noticing something is off. And it isn’t for awhile until he starts to realize what it could be.
At first Yamapi doesn’t notice anything wrong, after all, Ryo goes out with them a lot. It’s just hanging out, talking about boobs and drinking more than they should and Ryo crashes on the couch when they relocate to Shige’s for the night. It’s normal, and Yamapi doesn’t question it.
Not until Shige starts coming over with the smell of Ryo’s musky cologne clinging to his clothes. Not until Shige starts declining Yamapi’s invitations to go out, only to hear (accidentally, if the way Ryo looks like he wants to take the words back) from Ryo that he was with Shige that same night.
“Is something wrong?” Yamapi asks Shige one day when they’re lying across the couch watching a movie. Yamapi has no idea what’s going on, his mind on other things, trying to forget how he found an extra key that looks far too similar to the one for Ryo’s apartment in Shige’s coat earlier than day when Shige was in the bathroom.
“Hm?” Shige murmurs, curling closer to Yamapi, his cheek against Yamapi’s chest. “No, why are you asking?”
“Just, lately, you seem distracted,” Yamapi says quietly, not sure how he can even broach the topic, especially when he doesn’t know. It can’t be, anyway, right? Why would Shige do such a thing? How could he, when Yamapi loves him this much?
“Sorry,” Shige replies, turning around to look at Yamapi in the eye. “I guess I’ve just been tired. But nothing is wrong, really.”
Yamapi threads his fingers through Shige’s hair. “You sure?” he says. “You can tell me anything, you know.”
Shige smiles, nods. “I know,” he says, sighing contently as Yamapi’s fingers tuck his hair behind his ear and brush across his cheek. “I’m okay.”
“I love you,” Yamapi says, kisses him, and Shige nods again, holds him tighter.
Shige’s not cheating on him, Yamapi tells himself. Over and over until he has no choice but to believe it. The long days where they don’t see each other is just because they’re busy. The way Shige’s touch doesn’t linger as long is just because he’s tired. The way Shige doesn’t say I love you as much is just because he’s shy. The way Shige looks at Ryo is because they’re just friends.
Shige wouldn’t cheat on him. Shige loves him. Why would he cheat on Yamapi who loves him so much? Who would do anything for him?
And yet, here he is, Shige that Yamapi loves with all of his heart, pressing a shirtless Ryo down against the couch in the dressing room after a photo shoot. Everyone else has left, except Yamapi has come back because he realizes he forgot his wallet on the table. He can see it from his spot by the door, peering through the tiny opening, sitting right where he left it. But that’s not what he cares about, all he can see is Ryo and Shige on the couch next to the table, rocking together like they’ve done this before.
Yamapi’s heart burns painfully in his chest and yet he can’t look away, he can’t move and he can’t barge in there and stop them. He stays standing where he is and he watches. Watches as Ryo curls his fingers into Shige’s hair and kisses him, watches as Shige makes a soft noise that only Yamapi was ever meant to hear, a noise he hasn’t heard in a long time, only just seeming to realize how long it’s been since they’ve had sex, Shige, always Shige, he remembers, making some excuse - too tired, too late, maybe another time, can’t we just watch a movie?
It’s like a car wreck, the way Yamapi can’t stop watching. Shige slides his fingers along Ryo’s sides, pressing his lips into Ryo’s neck and sucking just light enough to not leave a mark, Yamapi remembers that, the way Shige’s tongue flicked against his skin. Ryo drags his fingers up Shige’s back, pulling his shirt up with him and they break apart long enough to get it off. His fingers return, tracing Shige’s spine and digging into his shoulder blades as they move against each other harder, faster.
“Shige,” Ryo gasps and Shige groans into his collar and the sound hits Yamapi in the chest like a blunt knife.
They’re scrambling to get each other’s pants off, pulling on belts and ripping at buttons until Shige has Ryo’s cock in his hand, leaning down to swipe his tongue across the head. Ryo moans and tangles his fingers into Shige’s hair, and Yamapi remembers how Shige said he hated that, remembers how Shige wouldn’t ever go down on him unless Yamapi asked. Ryo didn’t ask, and yet here is Shige taking Ryo’s cock into his mouth and letting Ryo pull on his hair.
It’s like each thing they do pierces Yamapi with needles and even still he can’t stop watching. He doesn’t understand, he doesn’t get it. Why, why would Shige do this? Why would he need this? Was Yamapi doing something wrong, was Yamapi not enough? How could he not be, when he loves Shige so much, when he would let Shige do whatever he wanted, when he gave Shige everything he need. Why Ryo, why not him?
He doesn’t understand and he watches, watches with a pounding heart trying to see if maybe he’ll figure it out from the way Shige sucks Ryo into his mouth and hums around him, the way Shige licks tip before delving back down, over and over again until Ryo is pushing him away with a frustrated groan. Shige licks his lips and reaches up to kiss Ryo again, breathing Ryo’s name into his mouth and cutting another deep wound into Yamapi’s heart.
Ryo reaches for his bag on the floor and pulls a small tube out and hands it to Shige who pulls the last of his clothing off before kneeling above Ryo and reaching between his legs after coating his fingers. And Yamapi watches as Shige does something he never did with him, always claiming to be too embarrassed, but now he’s moaning shamelessly as he preps himself with Ryo watching with dark, intense eyes.
Yamapi sucks in a breath when Ryo finally pushes in a few minutes later, pulling Shige down with hands on his hips until they’re flush together. Yamapi’s fingers clench into fists at his side, digging into his palms so hard he thinks he might eventually break his skin. But that pain is more welcome to the one in his chest right now, continuing to watch as Ryo fucks Shige, as Shige fucks himself on Ryo, moving up and down on his lap with ease and skill, a hand on Ryo’s knee and the other on his shoulder to balance himself and move more fluidly.
And he’s moaning Ryo’s name like a never-ending mantra in a breathless voice that Yamapi remembers when he would push into Shige and curl fingers around his cock and make him come so hard he could only lie there until Yamapi would follow. He still doesn’t understand, as he keeps watching, he doesn’t know why and it just doesn’t make any sense. Yamapi loves Shige, Yamapi would never fuck him as hard as Ryo seems to be doing now, and it doesn’t matter if Shige seems to like it, groaning as he leans forward into Ryo’s chest and rocks back at each one of Ryo’s thrusts.
Yamapi’s heart thuds in his ears as he can tell they’re getting closer, moving together in an almost impossible pace, muting their groans into each other’s mouths. Ryo reaches out to take Shige’s cock in his hand, stroking it up and down to match their pace and Yamapi’s veins fill with a mix of jealousy and sadness at how Shige loves it, encourages him by covering his hand over Ryo’s and dictating the rhythm until he cries out and tenses, his back taut beautifully as he comes over their fingers.
Ryo hisses as he suddenly gets up, pushing Shige onto his back upon the couch and lifting his legs to push into Shige harder, deeper as he too nears his peak. He mouths Shige’s collarbone as Shige writhes beneath him still, pleasure jolting throughout his body as Ryo undoubtedly hits that spot inside.
“Ryo,” Shige whispers, touching his fingers to Ryo’s cheek before sliding through his hair and Ryo groans deeply as he thrusts into Shige faster just two more times before he finally comes as well, shuddering as Shige pulls him down and into a slow, deep kiss.
Yamapi feels like his heart has been ripped into shreds but he remains standing until they move, silently gathering up their clothes and it almost hurts even more when they smile at each other, kiss each other’s lips as they redress, their fingers brushing together and their eyes meeting. Yamapi knows he should move now, before they catch him, but half of him doesn’t know what to do, whether to let them know he saw them, or to keep it a secret.
In the last second he turns the corner, hiding out of the way, knowing they’ll go the opposite direction to get out of the building. The last thing he hears is Ryo questioning, “Are you still coming by tomorrow?”
Shige smiles and replies, “Of course,” and Yamapi’s heart plummets because they’d already planned dinner tomorrow night, and now he knows that Shige will refuse to come home with him, will instead head over to Ryo’s.
Once they’re out of sight, Yamapi heads to the dressing room to retrieve his wallet before he heads home.
That entire night he’s up wondering what to do, still unable to grasp what he saw, confused and lost and hurt in a way he never thought was possible.
The next day Yamapi is more aware than ever of Shige and Ryo, how they look at each other, how they banter and laugh and make fun of each other, how their fingers touch and how they don’t even notice Yamapi is watching, angry that they could be so bold as to act like this while he’s around. And he knows he has to do something about it or that pain in his chest will never leave him.
At the end of the day, he pulls Shige with him into an empty dressing room, ignoring the way Ryo’s eyes watch them leave and Shige’s protests. He pushes Shige up against the door the second he slams shut and then follows with his lips. And it hurts even more when Shige only pushes him away, gasping as he exclaims, “What’re you doing?”
“What does it look like, Shige?” he says, leaning in to kiss him again, but it’s wrong, it’s all wrong, because these lips have kissed Ryo, and who even knows how many else, and yet Yamapi still wants him because he loves Shige, loves him more than anyone else could and why, why doesn’t Shige see it?!
“Stop, Yamapi, wait,” Shige says, pushing Yamapi back and Yamapi can’t take anymore of it, Shige’s hard gaze cutting through to his core.
“You let Ryo kiss you,” he whispers in a low voice and Shige immediately tenses.
“W-What?” he says breathlessly, eyes widening, and Yamapi just sees the horror, the guilt.
“I saw you yesterday,” Yamapi says as his fingers curl around Shige’s wrists. “I saw you, the two of you, in the dressing room.”
“Yamapi-Tomohisa-I-I can explain, I-” Shige says frantically, catching the hurt in Yamapi’s eyes and the tone of his voice.
Yamapi just shakes his head profusely and his fingers dig harder into Shige’s wrists. “Why?” he breathes, “Why would you? How the fuck could you?” And it’s anger mixed with pain mixed with fury and agony all rolled up into a giant hurricane of emotions that whip through Yamapi’s brain and form into words that he can’t stop spilling from his lips. “I love you, Shige, how could you do this?”
He doesn’t give Shige a chance to respond because he’s kissing him again, harder, deeper, with more desperation as if kissing him like this will make him change his mind, make him remember who really loves him, because Yamapi would do anything for him, would give his life for him, and no one, no one else would ever do that. Not like Yamapi, Yamapi who loves Shige more than anything else in the world.
But Shige just struggles against him, fights him, tearing his mouth away and shoving him until Yamapi falls back into a chair behind him. He stares up at Shige with wide eyes and Shige looks back in shock, his chest heaving as he seems to figure out what to say.
“Why, Shige?” is all Yamapi can utter as he picks himself up and joins Shige again, sliding his thumb across Shige’s cheek and jaw the way Shige always seemed to like. “Why? When I love you so much?”
Shige shudders out a breath and turns his head away. Yamapi’s hand drops to his side, limp, broken like his heart. “I’m sorry,” Shige says and he pushes open the door and is gone in the next second.
end.
note: i hope you liked it! thanks for reading~ ♥
Title: Grenade
Pairing: ShigePi, RyoShige
Rating: NC-17
Summary: Yamapi loves Shige more than anything, so why would Shige ever cheat on him, right?
Author’s Note: 2671 words. For the Bunny Meme, originally requested here.
If someone had told him when NEWS was first formed that he’d be in a relationship with Kato Shigeaki, Yamapi’s answer would probably have been, “Who?”
Of course now he definitely knows who Shige is and Shige is more than just a bandmate. Somehow, in the past few years Shige has turned into a friend, a confidant, and now, a boyfriend, a lover. It’s definitely not something Yamapi ever expected, but he can’t say he doesn’t like it. In fact, he’s pretty sure he loves Shige, and is glad to know that Shige loves him back.
They work well together. Shige is grounded while Yamapi is a dreamer and they complement each other that way. Shige is also funny and knows how to have a good time, whether that’s going out for drinks or just lounging at home watching a movie. Yamapi likes Shige because he’s not fussy, he doesn’t have demands and he isn’t clingy. He’s a far cry from any girl Yamapi’s ever dated and it’s this, probably, that makes Yamapi like him all that much more.
But around six months after they start dating, Yamapi notices things changing. Shige doesn’t call him up as much anymore, doesn’t give into Yamapi’s (usually drunken) requests to come over, doesn’t head home with him after work without a word, doesn’t pull Yamapi into an empty dressing room before a concert or after a photo shoot and kiss him senseless. Yamapi is more observant than people give him credit for and he’s certain something is wrong. He doesn’t want to think about it, can’t even fathom the reason why, but it’s there, this little scratch in his mind that begs to be itched.
Other than this though, Shige acts normally. He kisses Yamapi good morning whenever they’re together, he sits next to him during meetings, lets Yamapi put a hand on his thigh under the table, falls asleep sometimes with his head in Yamapi’s lap, and takes candid photos of Yamapi cooking or cleaning around the house with that bright smile on his face.
And Yamapi is content with his life right now, happy, really. He likes bringing Shige home with him after work and pushing him up against the wall in the genkan to kiss the smile off his lips. He likes waking up to Shige making breakfast on a day off in just his boxers. He likes coming over to Shige’s in between photo shoots and crashing on his couch, his head in Shige’s lap while Shige plays with his hair. He likes it when Shige whispers, “Tomohisa,” into his ear as they move together on his bed, fingers touching skin and hearts beating as one.
Yet Yamapi can’t stop himself from noticing something is off. And it isn’t for awhile until he starts to realize what it could be.
At first Yamapi doesn’t notice anything wrong, after all, Ryo goes out with them a lot. It’s just hanging out, talking about boobs and drinking more than they should and Ryo crashes on the couch when they relocate to Shige’s for the night. It’s normal, and Yamapi doesn’t question it.
Not until Shige starts coming over with the smell of Ryo’s musky cologne clinging to his clothes. Not until Shige starts declining Yamapi’s invitations to go out, only to hear (accidentally, if the way Ryo looks like he wants to take the words back) from Ryo that he was with Shige that same night.
“Is something wrong?” Yamapi asks Shige one day when they’re lying across the couch watching a movie. Yamapi has no idea what’s going on, his mind on other things, trying to forget how he found an extra key that looks far too similar to the one for Ryo’s apartment in Shige’s coat earlier than day when Shige was in the bathroom.
“Hm?” Shige murmurs, curling closer to Yamapi, his cheek against Yamapi’s chest. “No, why are you asking?”
“Just, lately, you seem distracted,” Yamapi says quietly, not sure how he can even broach the topic, especially when he doesn’t know. It can’t be, anyway, right? Why would Shige do such a thing? How could he, when Yamapi loves him this much?
“Sorry,” Shige replies, turning around to look at Yamapi in the eye. “I guess I’ve just been tired. But nothing is wrong, really.”
Yamapi threads his fingers through Shige’s hair. “You sure?” he says. “You can tell me anything, you know.”
Shige smiles, nods. “I know,” he says, sighing contently as Yamapi’s fingers tuck his hair behind his ear and brush across his cheek. “I’m okay.”
“I love you,” Yamapi says, kisses him, and Shige nods again, holds him tighter.
Shige’s not cheating on him, Yamapi tells himself. Over and over until he has no choice but to believe it. The long days where they don’t see each other is just because they’re busy. The way Shige’s touch doesn’t linger as long is just because he’s tired. The way Shige doesn’t say I love you as much is just because he’s shy. The way Shige looks at Ryo is because they’re just friends.
Shige wouldn’t cheat on him. Shige loves him. Why would he cheat on Yamapi who loves him so much? Who would do anything for him?
And yet, here he is, Shige that Yamapi loves with all of his heart, pressing a shirtless Ryo down against the couch in the dressing room after a photo shoot. Everyone else has left, except Yamapi has come back because he realizes he forgot his wallet on the table. He can see it from his spot by the door, peering through the tiny opening, sitting right where he left it. But that’s not what he cares about, all he can see is Ryo and Shige on the couch next to the table, rocking together like they’ve done this before.
Yamapi’s heart burns painfully in his chest and yet he can’t look away, he can’t move and he can’t barge in there and stop them. He stays standing where he is and he watches. Watches as Ryo curls his fingers into Shige’s hair and kisses him, watches as Shige makes a soft noise that only Yamapi was ever meant to hear, a noise he hasn’t heard in a long time, only just seeming to realize how long it’s been since they’ve had sex, Shige, always Shige, he remembers, making some excuse - too tired, too late, maybe another time, can’t we just watch a movie?
It’s like a car wreck, the way Yamapi can’t stop watching. Shige slides his fingers along Ryo’s sides, pressing his lips into Ryo’s neck and sucking just light enough to not leave a mark, Yamapi remembers that, the way Shige’s tongue flicked against his skin. Ryo drags his fingers up Shige’s back, pulling his shirt up with him and they break apart long enough to get it off. His fingers return, tracing Shige’s spine and digging into his shoulder blades as they move against each other harder, faster.
“Shige,” Ryo gasps and Shige groans into his collar and the sound hits Yamapi in the chest like a blunt knife.
They’re scrambling to get each other’s pants off, pulling on belts and ripping at buttons until Shige has Ryo’s cock in his hand, leaning down to swipe his tongue across the head. Ryo moans and tangles his fingers into Shige’s hair, and Yamapi remembers how Shige said he hated that, remembers how Shige wouldn’t ever go down on him unless Yamapi asked. Ryo didn’t ask, and yet here is Shige taking Ryo’s cock into his mouth and letting Ryo pull on his hair.
It’s like each thing they do pierces Yamapi with needles and even still he can’t stop watching. He doesn’t understand, he doesn’t get it. Why, why would Shige do this? Why would he need this? Was Yamapi doing something wrong, was Yamapi not enough? How could he not be, when he loves Shige so much, when he would let Shige do whatever he wanted, when he gave Shige everything he need. Why Ryo, why not him?
He doesn’t understand and he watches, watches with a pounding heart trying to see if maybe he’ll figure it out from the way Shige sucks Ryo into his mouth and hums around him, the way Shige licks tip before delving back down, over and over again until Ryo is pushing him away with a frustrated groan. Shige licks his lips and reaches up to kiss Ryo again, breathing Ryo’s name into his mouth and cutting another deep wound into Yamapi’s heart.
Ryo reaches for his bag on the floor and pulls a small tube out and hands it to Shige who pulls the last of his clothing off before kneeling above Ryo and reaching between his legs after coating his fingers. And Yamapi watches as Shige does something he never did with him, always claiming to be too embarrassed, but now he’s moaning shamelessly as he preps himself with Ryo watching with dark, intense eyes.
Yamapi sucks in a breath when Ryo finally pushes in a few minutes later, pulling Shige down with hands on his hips until they’re flush together. Yamapi’s fingers clench into fists at his side, digging into his palms so hard he thinks he might eventually break his skin. But that pain is more welcome to the one in his chest right now, continuing to watch as Ryo fucks Shige, as Shige fucks himself on Ryo, moving up and down on his lap with ease and skill, a hand on Ryo’s knee and the other on his shoulder to balance himself and move more fluidly.
And he’s moaning Ryo’s name like a never-ending mantra in a breathless voice that Yamapi remembers when he would push into Shige and curl fingers around his cock and make him come so hard he could only lie there until Yamapi would follow. He still doesn’t understand, as he keeps watching, he doesn’t know why and it just doesn’t make any sense. Yamapi loves Shige, Yamapi would never fuck him as hard as Ryo seems to be doing now, and it doesn’t matter if Shige seems to like it, groaning as he leans forward into Ryo’s chest and rocks back at each one of Ryo’s thrusts.
Yamapi’s heart thuds in his ears as he can tell they’re getting closer, moving together in an almost impossible pace, muting their groans into each other’s mouths. Ryo reaches out to take Shige’s cock in his hand, stroking it up and down to match their pace and Yamapi’s veins fill with a mix of jealousy and sadness at how Shige loves it, encourages him by covering his hand over Ryo’s and dictating the rhythm until he cries out and tenses, his back taut beautifully as he comes over their fingers.
Ryo hisses as he suddenly gets up, pushing Shige onto his back upon the couch and lifting his legs to push into Shige harder, deeper as he too nears his peak. He mouths Shige’s collarbone as Shige writhes beneath him still, pleasure jolting throughout his body as Ryo undoubtedly hits that spot inside.
“Ryo,” Shige whispers, touching his fingers to Ryo’s cheek before sliding through his hair and Ryo groans deeply as he thrusts into Shige faster just two more times before he finally comes as well, shuddering as Shige pulls him down and into a slow, deep kiss.
Yamapi feels like his heart has been ripped into shreds but he remains standing until they move, silently gathering up their clothes and it almost hurts even more when they smile at each other, kiss each other’s lips as they redress, their fingers brushing together and their eyes meeting. Yamapi knows he should move now, before they catch him, but half of him doesn’t know what to do, whether to let them know he saw them, or to keep it a secret.
In the last second he turns the corner, hiding out of the way, knowing they’ll go the opposite direction to get out of the building. The last thing he hears is Ryo questioning, “Are you still coming by tomorrow?”
Shige smiles and replies, “Of course,” and Yamapi’s heart plummets because they’d already planned dinner tomorrow night, and now he knows that Shige will refuse to come home with him, will instead head over to Ryo’s.
Once they’re out of sight, Yamapi heads to the dressing room to retrieve his wallet before he heads home.
That entire night he’s up wondering what to do, still unable to grasp what he saw, confused and lost and hurt in a way he never thought was possible.
The next day Yamapi is more aware than ever of Shige and Ryo, how they look at each other, how they banter and laugh and make fun of each other, how their fingers touch and how they don’t even notice Yamapi is watching, angry that they could be so bold as to act like this while he’s around. And he knows he has to do something about it or that pain in his chest will never leave him.
At the end of the day, he pulls Shige with him into an empty dressing room, ignoring the way Ryo’s eyes watch them leave and Shige’s protests. He pushes Shige up against the door the second he slams shut and then follows with his lips. And it hurts even more when Shige only pushes him away, gasping as he exclaims, “What’re you doing?”
“What does it look like, Shige?” he says, leaning in to kiss him again, but it’s wrong, it’s all wrong, because these lips have kissed Ryo, and who even knows how many else, and yet Yamapi still wants him because he loves Shige, loves him more than anyone else could and why, why doesn’t Shige see it?!
“Stop, Yamapi, wait,” Shige says, pushing Yamapi back and Yamapi can’t take anymore of it, Shige’s hard gaze cutting through to his core.
“You let Ryo kiss you,” he whispers in a low voice and Shige immediately tenses.
“W-What?” he says breathlessly, eyes widening, and Yamapi just sees the horror, the guilt.
“I saw you yesterday,” Yamapi says as his fingers curl around Shige’s wrists. “I saw you, the two of you, in the dressing room.”
“Yamapi-Tomohisa-I-I can explain, I-” Shige says frantically, catching the hurt in Yamapi’s eyes and the tone of his voice.
Yamapi just shakes his head profusely and his fingers dig harder into Shige’s wrists. “Why?” he breathes, “Why would you? How the fuck could you?” And it’s anger mixed with pain mixed with fury and agony all rolled up into a giant hurricane of emotions that whip through Yamapi’s brain and form into words that he can’t stop spilling from his lips. “I love you, Shige, how could you do this?”
He doesn’t give Shige a chance to respond because he’s kissing him again, harder, deeper, with more desperation as if kissing him like this will make him change his mind, make him remember who really loves him, because Yamapi would do anything for him, would give his life for him, and no one, no one else would ever do that. Not like Yamapi, Yamapi who loves Shige more than anything else in the world.
But Shige just struggles against him, fights him, tearing his mouth away and shoving him until Yamapi falls back into a chair behind him. He stares up at Shige with wide eyes and Shige looks back in shock, his chest heaving as he seems to figure out what to say.
“Why, Shige?” is all Yamapi can utter as he picks himself up and joins Shige again, sliding his thumb across Shige’s cheek and jaw the way Shige always seemed to like. “Why? When I love you so much?”
Shige shudders out a breath and turns his head away. Yamapi’s hand drops to his side, limp, broken like his heart. “I’m sorry,” Shige says and he pushes open the door and is gone in the next second.
end.
note: i hope you liked it! thanks for reading~ ♥