[everyfiveyears - Lindsey McDonald] Age 10 - Haunting Memories
Title: Haunting Memories
Author: Nora [remember_nomore/simply_shiny]
Fandom: Angel the Series
Character: Lindsey McDonald
Character’s Age: 10
Other Parts: [Found Here]
Word Count: 1155
Rating: PG-13
Beta: strangecreature
Author's Notes: Written for everyfiveyears
Haunting Memories
It’s been almost four years, four years since he buried his two siblings and a little over three since they took the house and were forced to move in with their grandparents. Everything is clear in his mind like it was yesterday.
Lindsey remembers standing in the rain by two small wooden markers, white chalk spelling out the names of his older brother Harold and his baby sister Sarah. The sight of those markers made him realize exactly how poor they were. The only image before his eyes was the memory that was imprinted in his mind of how pale Harold looked as he shivered with cold in the bed, six or more blankets covering him but providing him with no warmth.
What haunted his dreams the most over the past two years was the morning he found Sarah. He went to check on her after they’d moved Harold into their parent’s room so his coughing wouldn’t keep her awake. The look on her face…that blank stare she had, her body long since cold and her eyes looking out the window as if she was watching the snow fall. Lindsey found out differently when he climbed into the bed to wake her.
She never woke up. Her eyes just stared blankly at him. Vacant.
The tears had ran silently down his face, as he bit his lip to try and keep himself composed for Anna who gripped his hand like a vise. Almost as if holding onto his hand kept her alive.
It was still bitterly cold for even this late in January, and the ground was frozen almost solid. His uncle and father had spent half the night digging the small grave for his younger sister. Lindsey’s eyes were fixated on the ragged grave markers, knowing that anything could happen to add another marker next to Sarah’s.
Standing there, Lindsey watched as the tiny coffin was lowered, a few strands of the piece of blanket his mother made poking out from the cracks in the wood. He felt like he had the weight of the world on his shoulders. He was the oldest of the children and ever since they lost the house…it was his job to take care of everyone. His father was always off finding work - never with any success - and his mother’s health was getting rapidly worse. It wasn’t a physical illness, Lindsey knew that much, she had just given up and was now slowly fading away before his eyes, leaving him unable to do anything about it.
His grandparent’s health was fading and it was up to him to get everyone off to school, make sure their homework was done and that everyone ate. He always put himself last…if at all.
There were nights that it was harder than others, but he kept it to himself. He’d be helping Anna with her homework and he could almost swear he heard Sarah’s laughter. But he knew it wasn’t there. She’d never giggle when he playfully pulled her pigtails and Harold would never lock him in the hamper to find out where the presents were.
Lindsey missed that.
Winter would come around and he’d grown to hate the cold winter, he hated snow that much more. It reminded him of that last year in the house, that cold winter when it snowed almost daily; the snow that took his sibling’s from him.
He couldn’t wait until he was older. The second he could he was moving out of Oklahoma and moving somewhere warm where it never snowed. He’d be happy if he never saw snow again.
The sound of the school bus hydraulics under his seat pulled him out of his thoughts. “C’mon, Anna.” He nudged his younger sister who had fallen asleep against his arm. She woke up with a yawn and shuffled out of the seat, Lindsey following closely behind.
“Pappa home t’day’s?” she asked quietly as the bus took off behind him, leaving them at the edge of their grandparent’s driveway.
She always asked and he always said the same answer. “Don’t know, I hope so.” He wasn’t sure if that was a lie or not; they hadn’t seen their father in more than six months. His father had a talent that Lindsey never wanted, the talent to lie right to someone’s face and them never the wiser.
He remembered the first time he saw that look, the day he signed over the house to some loan sharks he owed money to. Less than a week later the house was bulldozed over, nothing more left than dirt and the boards that used to make up their home.
“Me too.” Anna’s voice pulled him from his thoughts and she pulled her hand from Lindsey’s grasp and started running up the driveway.
“Careful, watch out for glass,” he yelled after her, biting his lip as he pulled his own shoes off, his toes digging into the soft spring grass. Lindsey always pulled his shoes off at the edge of the gravel and dirt covered driveway; the less he wore them the less worn they’d get is how he thought.
With bare feet, he tucked his shoes under his arm along with his books, bending down to pick up the burlap sack that Anna used as her school bag and headed up the driveway, wondering what chores he could do before sundown and which neighbor would have the first vegetables of the season. They were always nice about letting him do little things in exchange; he knew he could always count on Mrs. Miller, if she didn’t have anything for him to do, she’d make something up. She knew that Lindsey would never take anything without working for it and gave up trying to argue with him about that.
“Lins’y!” A small smile formed on his lips when he walked in the door, Philip sitting in his highchair flailing his arms around, happy to see his older brother.
“Hey.” Lindsey grinned, leaning over and kissing his brother’s cheek before looking over at his mother. “Hey mamma. Daddy home yet?”
She smiled weakly, ignoring the question about his father and stroked his sun-kissed hair. “How was school?”
Dropping his books and shoes he shrugged and pulled out an apple and handed it to his mother. “Got an A on my math test; won apples.” Lindsey beamed, making her take it. “Already had mine, saved this for you.” He kept his gaze with hers, lying just to get her to take it. “Not gonna let ya’ say no.”
“My stubborn boy,” his mother laughed, taking the apple and reaching for a knife. “We’ll share.”
He nodded, climbing up onto the stool next to her, enjoying that she was having a good day. On good days he could be a kid and take a rest; but her bad spells would come again and he would have to be the adult again. Those days always came.
Author: Nora [remember_nomore/simply_shiny]
Fandom: Angel the Series
Character: Lindsey McDonald
Character’s Age: 10
Other Parts: [Found Here]
Word Count: 1155
Rating: PG-13
Beta: strangecreature
Author's Notes: Written for everyfiveyears
Haunting Memories
It’s been almost four years, four years since he buried his two siblings and a little over three since they took the house and were forced to move in with their grandparents. Everything is clear in his mind like it was yesterday.
Lindsey remembers standing in the rain by two small wooden markers, white chalk spelling out the names of his older brother Harold and his baby sister Sarah. The sight of those markers made him realize exactly how poor they were. The only image before his eyes was the memory that was imprinted in his mind of how pale Harold looked as he shivered with cold in the bed, six or more blankets covering him but providing him with no warmth.
What haunted his dreams the most over the past two years was the morning he found Sarah. He went to check on her after they’d moved Harold into their parent’s room so his coughing wouldn’t keep her awake. The look on her face…that blank stare she had, her body long since cold and her eyes looking out the window as if she was watching the snow fall. Lindsey found out differently when he climbed into the bed to wake her.
She never woke up. Her eyes just stared blankly at him. Vacant.
The tears had ran silently down his face, as he bit his lip to try and keep himself composed for Anna who gripped his hand like a vise. Almost as if holding onto his hand kept her alive.
It was still bitterly cold for even this late in January, and the ground was frozen almost solid. His uncle and father had spent half the night digging the small grave for his younger sister. Lindsey’s eyes were fixated on the ragged grave markers, knowing that anything could happen to add another marker next to Sarah’s.
Standing there, Lindsey watched as the tiny coffin was lowered, a few strands of the piece of blanket his mother made poking out from the cracks in the wood. He felt like he had the weight of the world on his shoulders. He was the oldest of the children and ever since they lost the house…it was his job to take care of everyone. His father was always off finding work - never with any success - and his mother’s health was getting rapidly worse. It wasn’t a physical illness, Lindsey knew that much, she had just given up and was now slowly fading away before his eyes, leaving him unable to do anything about it.
His grandparent’s health was fading and it was up to him to get everyone off to school, make sure their homework was done and that everyone ate. He always put himself last…if at all.
There were nights that it was harder than others, but he kept it to himself. He’d be helping Anna with her homework and he could almost swear he heard Sarah’s laughter. But he knew it wasn’t there. She’d never giggle when he playfully pulled her pigtails and Harold would never lock him in the hamper to find out where the presents were.
Lindsey missed that.
Winter would come around and he’d grown to hate the cold winter, he hated snow that much more. It reminded him of that last year in the house, that cold winter when it snowed almost daily; the snow that took his sibling’s from him.
He couldn’t wait until he was older. The second he could he was moving out of Oklahoma and moving somewhere warm where it never snowed. He’d be happy if he never saw snow again.
The sound of the school bus hydraulics under his seat pulled him out of his thoughts. “C’mon, Anna.” He nudged his younger sister who had fallen asleep against his arm. She woke up with a yawn and shuffled out of the seat, Lindsey following closely behind.
“Pappa home t’day’s?” she asked quietly as the bus took off behind him, leaving them at the edge of their grandparent’s driveway.
She always asked and he always said the same answer. “Don’t know, I hope so.” He wasn’t sure if that was a lie or not; they hadn’t seen their father in more than six months. His father had a talent that Lindsey never wanted, the talent to lie right to someone’s face and them never the wiser.
He remembered the first time he saw that look, the day he signed over the house to some loan sharks he owed money to. Less than a week later the house was bulldozed over, nothing more left than dirt and the boards that used to make up their home.
“Me too.” Anna’s voice pulled him from his thoughts and she pulled her hand from Lindsey’s grasp and started running up the driveway.
“Careful, watch out for glass,” he yelled after her, biting his lip as he pulled his own shoes off, his toes digging into the soft spring grass. Lindsey always pulled his shoes off at the edge of the gravel and dirt covered driveway; the less he wore them the less worn they’d get is how he thought.
With bare feet, he tucked his shoes under his arm along with his books, bending down to pick up the burlap sack that Anna used as her school bag and headed up the driveway, wondering what chores he could do before sundown and which neighbor would have the first vegetables of the season. They were always nice about letting him do little things in exchange; he knew he could always count on Mrs. Miller, if she didn’t have anything for him to do, she’d make something up. She knew that Lindsey would never take anything without working for it and gave up trying to argue with him about that.
“Lins’y!” A small smile formed on his lips when he walked in the door, Philip sitting in his highchair flailing his arms around, happy to see his older brother.
“Hey.” Lindsey grinned, leaning over and kissing his brother’s cheek before looking over at his mother. “Hey mamma. Daddy home yet?”
She smiled weakly, ignoring the question about his father and stroked his sun-kissed hair. “How was school?”
Dropping his books and shoes he shrugged and pulled out an apple and handed it to his mother. “Got an A on my math test; won apples.” Lindsey beamed, making her take it. “Already had mine, saved this for you.” He kept his gaze with hers, lying just to get her to take it. “Not gonna let ya’ say no.”
“My stubborn boy,” his mother laughed, taking the apple and reaching for a knife. “We’ll share.”
He nodded, climbing up onto the stool next to her, enjoying that she was having a good day. On good days he could be a kid and take a rest; but her bad spells would come again and he would have to be the adult again. Those days always came.