another start, same result?
Ok well I am back in Lubbock and well it seems as if nothing has changed. Usually that would be a good thing if you liked a place however for me it makes me nervous. For those of you who didn't know I had a terrible time last year with a lot of different things just not going the way that I would have liked. I did have a better second semester last year but I can't help to feel as if something is missing. The thing is I know what is missing and that is my friends. I believe that I make friends really easily but up here...I don't know its hard for me. People just seem so closed minded and even the friends I do have up here seem to be so distant. There is not one single person that I could sit down and have a discussion like the many I had with my closest friends in San Anotnio. Maybe its just been this past week that has just put a damper on things. I got to Lubbock and well I really do like my new dorm/on campus appt. It very upscale but I feel I just really don't click with anybody. There are two main types of people up here those who go out and get drunk and fucked up as much as they can and people who are sooooo againest drinking its not funny. Take my suitemate for example. He is a nice guy don't get me wrong but he has never had a sip of alcohol and only drinks water and gatoraid.(he also is always on his computer playing one of those crazy shooter games) So what are my choices to fit in either play computer all night or go out and drink until I can't remember anything? I choose neither and because of that I have no one I am close with up here. Yes Kelly and I have gotten a lot closer with last year and all but she is really busy being a CA (RA) and all. Its so funny everyone that I talked to before I got into college told me what a great experience it is and how much fun i am going to have. Yet I look at my friends page and almost every single person has a recent post on how unhappy they are. Ok you know what I am going to come out and say it. College is overrated. There definatly are some good things about it but overall its really hard. I think that missing your friends and the comfort of being in a place where everything is familar to you is what makes it bad. I am not saying that is for everyone. People definatly get lucky by going to place and meeting people that have a lot of the same interests as you but its very hard in lubbock to find someone who is a Jewish guy who likes to play basketball and can sit down and talk with you for hours over his beliefs in god, girls and government. A good friend of mine today left me a message saying that I was going to transfer to OU or he was going to throw a rock at me. It made me laugh but also made me think again(for the 100th time) about transfering. Would I be happier at OU or UT or Texas State? I think I might be but it is going to take a lot for me to make the move to another new place after it seems like that is all I have been doing lately. O well we will see I am planning on trying to get involved as much as I can up here and see if that helps. I think I am going to be running for Senate so if you know anybody that goes to Tech tell them to vote for me when Senate elections come around.
The only thing that is keeping me together and preventing me from falling into the same shitty feeling as I had last year is my amazing girl friend. Talking to her just seems to make everything right and as bad as everything is going she is kind of like the light at the end of the tunnel. I know that no matter how bad things get she will be there for me after all of this crap clears or even if it doesn't. A girl in my life being there for me when I need them the most...wow thats a new one. She joins a very alite list of girls in my life that I can count on when shit seems to hit the fan. If you have to ask if you are one of them then the answer is probably no. Sorry I am beginning to be harsh getting late and I am tired. Too bad I can't go to sleep when I am in my bed. O also if you want to talk send me a text my cell doesn't get any reception in my dorm room. Yep you can add that to the shit in my life that drives me crazy. Ok well that is enough bitching for one post.
The only thing that is keeping me together and preventing me from falling into the same shitty feeling as I had last year is my amazing girl friend. Talking to her just seems to make everything right and as bad as everything is going she is kind of like the light at the end of the tunnel. I know that no matter how bad things get she will be there for me after all of this crap clears or even if it doesn't. A girl in my life being there for me when I need them the most...wow thats a new one. She joins a very alite list of girls in my life that I can count on when shit seems to hit the fan. If you have to ask if you are one of them then the answer is probably no. Sorry I am beginning to be harsh getting late and I am tired. Too bad I can't go to sleep when I am in my bed. O also if you want to talk send me a text my cell doesn't get any reception in my dorm room. Yep you can add that to the shit in my life that drives me crazy. Ok well that is enough bitching for one post.