(no subject)
I just realized something. Since the beginning of the school year, all I've been looking forward to was going to Chicago. Now that I have gone and returned, what the heck do I have to look forward to?! This is a serious problem, whether anyone else thinks it is or not. I need something, or else I feel like everything is useless. I know I have to get a job, but I don't really see that as something I look forward to, so I am still screwed. Looking forward to things makes me happier, so by having nothing, I'm feel like I'm pointless. (This then makes me upset and unhappy). Which then brings up the crying fit I had when I got home because one, I forgot my art book and other items in the hotel room in Chigaco, and two, for having to come back to crap hole Ohio. For some people, crying makes them feel better. For me, no. It makes me feel worse, so I basically feel emotionally and physically drained right now.