the deens legacy 7.0
Warning: Super long update. Over 150 .pngs.
Last time, on the Deens Legacy: Quincey had a baby and moved out. Ross married Clem, had a baby, then moved out. Sam continued to do his creeper thing, invaded personal space, convinced Lyle to take himself and Yara to a bar, and grew up into wonderful leather pants and his mother's hairstyle.
Lyle (legendarysims ): So, your birthday was a complete bust thanks to your sister-in-law going into labor. That was honestly probably one of the worst parties I've ever been to.
Sam: Ugh. Don't remind me. Ross always tries to steal my glory.
Lyle: I guess we could always have another party...?
Sam: It just wouldn't be the same. I'll think of something else and get back to you.
Sam: Ok, I've got an idea.
Lyle: Well that took all of two seconds. Also, I would ask why you are holding that flower, but at this point I've learned it's better to just not ask.
Sam: Oh, this? It's just in case I need it for, you know... things. But anyway, I heard about this thing called "skinny dipping." I totally think we should do it.
Lyle: Sure, why not? I don't see what harm it could cause.
Sam: Lyle, I don't understand. Why are you naked?
Lyle: That's what skinny dipping is. You go swimming naked. Also, remember our talk about personal space? Because now would be a really good time to remember it.
Lyle: I'm just gonna swim over here, and you stay over there, ok?
Sam: I'm not really sure how I feel about this...
Meanwhile, Karst (ohsims ) had got a call from one of his campaign coordinators to go out and get a drink together. When Karst arrived, the man started trying to convince Karst that he and Karst should embezzle funds from the campaign.
Jack: Imagine the money we could make! You could afford to buy designer suits, and you could probably pay off election officials to rig the election so you always win.
Karst: Jack, I don't know what kind of politician you think I am, but I will not tolerate this kind of attitude on my campaign team.
Lenny: Mayor Parvenu-Deens! Turn the choke hold this way! It would make a great picture for our front page.
Lenny: Mayor Parvenu-Deens! Tell me, why did you do it?
Karst: I am determined to clean up corruption in this city by any means necessary.
While Karst was engaging in bar brawls, Noble was having a birthday back home.
Camilla: Hooray, Mrs. Deens! Excuse me if I don't appear too enthusiastic about your birthday. It is not befitting of butlers to appear overenthusiastic, but I assure you I am excited all the same!
Lyle: How will you ever become famous now that you are old and wrinkly?
Noble: Thank you for the compliment, young man. I am glad to know that I look as young as I ever did.
Sam, meanwhile...
Sam: I hope Lyle appreciates all the trouble I went through for this scrap for his stupid time machine.
With a heavy heart, Sam started work on the time machine that would allow Lyle to go back to his own time.
Sam: Oh yeah, that's how you make a miner, not a time machine. Well, tough shit for Lyle.
It was also time for Karst's birthday. Lyle played an epic guitar solo in his rock star gear in Karst's honor.
Karst: Bravo! I may not understand the attraction in music you young people enjoy these days, but I enjoy the sentiment nonetheless!
Karst: Now, I only wish to become as smoking as my elderly wife.
Karst: Son, your mother and I have been talking. Your brother and sister have already gotten married and moved out on their own. When can we expect you to do the same?
Sam: Karst, I'm heir. I have to stay in this drama-filled house until I die or until I accidentally blow it up in a fit of genius inventing.
Karst: I would really prefer if you didn't do that last one.
Later that night, Camilla got up the nerve to talk to Lyle about something that had been bothering her ever since she started working at the house.
Camilla: Listen, Lyle, I know it's not really my place to say this as a butler, but I can't stand aside and let this go on any longer. Don't you think that maybe you should call the cops on this Sam kid? I mean, he's obviously a stalker. I've seen all of those posters and pictures he has of you in his room. And that shrine? Creepy!
Lyle: Well, I don't know. He's never done anything that's caused any real harm. He's just a bit overzealous in his admiration for me.
Camilla: You mean that kidnapping you isn't any real harm? And he's been trumpeting about the house about you and him going on a date ever since you took him and his friend out to that bar. You can't tell me that is normal behavior.
Lyle: You're right. Maybe I should have a talk with him.
Sam: Lyyyyyyle I want to keep you in this house foreverrrrrrrr.
Lyle: I should definitely have a talk with him.
And so, next morning...
Lyle: We need to have a talk.
Sam: I'm fixing this stereo for Yara. I'll be done in a second so wait on me in the living room.
Sam: Ok, now let's go see Yara.
Lyle: But I thought we were going to have a talk?
Sam: No time. Yara will kill me if I don't bring this back to her now. We'll talk later. Let's roll.
Lyle: *sigh* Fine.
They caught up with Yara (ohsims ) at the buttlerfly sanctuary or whatever the hell the huge glass dome is.
Yara: Sam! You have my stereo? Oh, and I'm glad to see you brought your handsome friend!
Lyle: Wow, Sam. I wasn't paying attention last time. Where did you find such a beautiful friend?
Yara: Oh, stop it. You flatter me.
Sam: Stop. Stop right there. I know what you're trying to do, Yara, and I won't have it.
Lyle: Maybe you would like to, I don't know, go get a drink or something?
Yara: That sounds like fun!
Sam: But I thought we were going to play sim gnubb and watch terrible made for tv movies tonight like we do every friday night. You can't skip out on our manly bonding night!
Lyle: Sorry, Sam. Sometimes a man has gotta do what a man has gotta do.
Sam: You are a jerk.
So Yara and Lyle went out for a night on the town at the local dance club.
Yara: I've been wondering, why do you wear those glasses? You'd be a lot more attractive without them on, I think.
Lyle: Oh, these things? Sam gave them to me a while back. If you think I'd look better with them off, I'll take them off.
Yara: See? Now I can see your eyes. You look so much better.
Lyle: You flatter~
Vamper Paparazzo: What a story this will make! Lyle Marx takes off his glasses and slow dances with mystery woman!
But the surprises were not over for Mr. Paparazzo, for Lyle had composed a ballad for his new ladyfriend on the fly.
Lyle: Oh baby youuuuuu you got what I neeeeeeeed
Yara: What a romantic song!
And with that, Lyle bagged himself a girlfriend.
The next morning...
Sam: So, I couldn't help but notice that you were out all night. Did you have fun?
Lyle: Oh, yeah! Yara and I danced all night, and we decided that we should start dating!
Sam: Well, isn't that lovely! Meanwhile, I stayed home all night, by myself might I add, and learned to sculpt so that I could make you a replica of Rumbleroar.
Lyle: No shit. You really made a Rumbleroar for me?
Sam: But obviously you aren't appreciative of my efforts since you didn't even bother coming home last night, so I think I'm just going to destroy it for scrap.
Lyle: NOOOOOOOOOOO.
Sam: This is an important lesson you are learning, Lyle.
Lyle: Goodbye, Rumbleroar. I hardly knew ye.
Sam then proceeded to run outside and jump in the pool to watch the explosion. This should have been a sign of things to come.
And then he stood on water to watch it.
Sam: Oh. Shit.
Karst: SON! I said I would rather you not blow up the house, remember?
The fire was so intense it even spread to the basement below.
And Lyle passed out from fear of the fire and loss of the sculpture.
Sam: So, I'm sorry about your bed.
Lyle: Sorry? You're sorry you destroyed my entire half of the room?
Sam: Well, yeah. I can tell you're upset.
Lyle: Upset doesn't even begin to describe how I feel? What the hell were you thinking?
Sam: I don't know! It's just I like you so much, and I was just so jealous that you spent the whole night out with Yara...
Lyle: Woah. Woahwoahwoah. Let me just stop you right there.
Lyle: I am interested in ladies.
Lyle: You, while having hair like a lady, are not a lady. Understand?
Lyle: I mean, it's not that I don't like you. I just don't like you like you like that.
Sam: Ok, fine. I get it.
Sam: I guess it's just you and me now, Greg.
And so Sam's room got a makeover since pretty much everything in it was destroyed.
Sam: I was going to tell Lyle that he could move into Grandpa Mark's old room, but since he's already here I guess it would be rude to wake him up.
Lyle: ...
Lyle: Oh God, I didn't do anything that I'm going to regret later, did I?
To make up for blowing up Rumbleroar, Sam offered to make an ice sculpture of Lyle.
Sam: Hold that pose! It makes you look very dignified.
Lyle: You know, this is pretty cool. I'm kind of sorry for going off on you the other day, Sam.
Sam: I believe it is my most beautiful work to date! I must put this somewhere where everyone can see it!
Lyle, however, was less than pleased.
Lyle: I should have known that he couldn't just keep it in the house. He would have to show it publicly.
And so Sam built a new shrine to Lyle out in the front yard.
Bertram: Good evening, Master Lyle!
Lyle: Uh, good evening. What happened to Camilla?
Bertram: It seems that she deserted her post. Master Sam called to inquire about hiring a new butler since Camilla hasn't reported for duty for over a week, and they sent me over. I look forward to serving you, Master Lyle!
Lyle: Has anyone heard from Camilla recently, though?
Bertram: Why, no. It's as if she disappeared.
Lyle: Ah.
At that disturbing news, Lyle moved outside to be alone with his thoughts.
Lyle: Sam wouldn't have done anything to her, would he? I mean, he couldn't have known that she talked to me about his behavior. I don't think I can be anywhere near him tonight. I'm sleeping out here. I have to get out of here tomorrow. I'm calling Yara first thing.
Sam had not yet given up on Lyle. The next morning, Sam went to ask for love advice from the person he thought most likely could give him the best advice for his sort of predicament.
Quincey: Hello, Sam. Come to tell me you have a great idea to ruin my son's birthday party just like you ruined my wedding?
Sam: That was a great wedding and you know it, but I have more important matters to discuss. I need advice about love, and you can give it to me.
Quincey: Advice about love? Maybe you should go ask Raphael about this. You're both guys.
Sam: No, only you-
Quincey: Go ask him and see what he says first.
Sam: Fine.
Hoyt: Mother, I couldn't help but notice that you were feeling rather upset by what crazy uncle Sam was saying to you. Perhaps I can cheer you up!
Quincey: Oh, you're trying to cheer me up?
Quincey: I don't know how to tell you this, son, but in this family, that kind of feel-good mumbojumbo just doesn't fly.
Quincey: I am very disappointed in you, son.
Hoyt: Fine, mother. I will go cheer up father instead. He appreciates that I am speaking from the heart.
Sam: Raphael said it was too much for him and that I should ask you instead.
Quincey: Fine.
Sam: Ok, so I am pretty sure I am in love with this person.
Quincey: Aw, my baby brother is growing up! How adorable.
Quincey: So you need advice for the bedroom, right? Well, you came to the right place.
Sam: No, I don't need bedroom advice. I know how to use sheets and even how to make the bed. My problem is that I love this person but they don't love me back. I tried making sculptures for them, but it didn't help.
Quincey: You've got to do more than make sculptures to capture a lady's heart. You have to show her that you are sincere.
Sam: I have, but this person says I'm not their type. How do I become their type?
Quincey: Well, it sounds to me like it's not an issue with you so much as an issue with them, so maybe you need to do something to make them like you.
Quincey: You're a smart guy, and you're good at inventing, so maybe you could make a machine that makes it to where you both have something in common, or a machine that will bind you two together in some way.
Sam: Oh, that's a good idea. I've seen some shows on daytime tv that deal with things that bind two people together.
Quincey: That's great. Now, one thing. Keep this on the downlow, ok? I don't need this coming back on me if you end up doing anything illegal. I don't mind the illegal part. It's just that I have a promising career at the hospital and I don't want you to ruin it for me.
Sam: Ok, thanks for the help, sis!
Quincey: Anytime.
Raphael (kaloslegacy ): This ice cream is exquisite!
Sam: Alright, Sam. Time to put your plan into action... right after you go swimming in Quincey's pool.
But he had no sooner made it into the pool than Yara called.
Sam: What? You're heading over to my house right now to see Lyle? I'll be right there!
By the time he arrived, Yara and Lyle were already flirting in the front yard.
Sam: You're doing this to me on purpose.
Sam: Oh, hi! I'm Yara Parvenu! I like to make out with my boyfriend on the lawn where everyone can see us and I am even more of a loser than Sam's brother Ross!
Yara: Just keep that up if you have a death wish, buddy!
Although he was happy with Quincey's advice, Sam decided to double check with Bertram before putting his plan into motion. Butlers always give good advice, after all.
Sam: What the hell kind of answer was that?
Bertram: I'm sorry, Master Sam. I am merely trying to tell you that you can always come to me for help.
Sam: Well, thanks.
Sam: But I have more important issues to deal with right now.
Much more important issues.
Yara: I can't wait to tell Sam that we did it on his bed!
Lyle: I'm not sure if I would do that. He's pretty unbalanced right now.
Yara: Don't care!
Meanwhile, Sam was downstairs drawing up plans for his invention.
Sam: Hmm, I'm not exactly sure, but I don't think a ladder is really what I need.
Lyle: Oh, hello Sam! How are you?
Sam: Ok. I would be doing better if you and Yara weren't up here bouncing and screaming on my bed earlier.
Lyle: Oh, you heard that?
Sam: Yeah. Please don't jump on the bed. It's not good for the box-spring.
The next morning...
Sam: I am on to you, Yara Parvenu.
Yara: So you told him what we did?
Lyle: ...no, he pretty much figured it out on his own.
Ghostly Mark does not approve of Yara at all.
Mark: I see you for what you really are, missy!
Yara: Ugh, keep your ectoplasmic opinions to yourself, ghost man.
Sam: Hey, Yara, just thought you might like to know. I'm making this really cool invention that will be the end of your relationship with Lyle and make him all mine.
Yara: Somehow I really doubt that.
Karst: It's nice to see that the boy has a friend.
Sam: Nonono, you just don't understand. Your mind...
Sam: Poof! It will be blown!
Yara: I don't know what craziness you are spouting now, but I am positive whatever it is you try to do will fail and explode in your face just like everything else you have tried in your life. Now, Lyle and I are going on a date. Follow us and die.
Sam: Explode and fail, my ass. Your face will explode and fail. Ha.
Meanwhile, Yara and Lyle's date was in full swing at the butterfly sanctuary where they first hooked up.
Lyle: I've been thinking, and if Sam does ever finish the time machine so I can return to the future, I want you to come with me.
Lyle: Will you marry me?
Yara: Of course. I really can't wait to rub this one in Sam's face.
Lyle: So vindictive! But I love you anyway.
Back home...
Sam: There, finished. Now for the final touches.
Sam: Just need to get a few of Lyle's hairs off of this brush, and everything will be ready to go.
Sam: Yara, come over here for a minute! I have something to show you.
Yara: I want to start off by telling you that Lyle and I are getting married. What do you want?
Sam: Well, that doesn't really matter anymore. I have finished the machine that will make Lyle mine forever. Follow me downstairs and watch me demonstrate.
Yara: Go on, and I'll be down in a minute. Lyle and I have something to do first.
Sam: Well, that took forever. Why are you wearing a towel.
Yara: Oh, Lyle and I were just having sex in your bed again.
Sam: I don't know what that means.
Sam: Anyway, behold the babynator!
Yara: Could you say that again, this time without the retarded Arnold Schwarzenegger accent?
Sam: Ha! No, but I can explain to you how it works!
Yara: Let me guess. It throws off sparks and then explodes, setting the entire house on fire?
Sam: ..... No.
Sam: In that box in between the two coils, there are hairs belonging to both myself and Lyle. When I turn the wheel on the wall, the babynator will activate, separate the DNA from our hair, and BAM! It will create a baby.
Yara: What does the little bird toy do?
Sam: Nothing. I just liked it.
Yara: Well, it sounds to me like this is destined to be a catastrophic failure. I'll be glad to watch your demonstration.
Sam: Everything is in place. Now, watch as I turn the wheel.
Yara: Wha-?!
Sam: Bam. Baby.
Sam: Although it is a bit of a surprise that it made two. I wasn't expecting that, but then again I didn't get a chance to fully test this.
Sam: Hm, I'm thinking maybe one more baby. There were three of us growing up, and that seemed like a good number of siblings.
Yara: Did you say that the DNA stuff was in this box here? What would happen if it were removed?
Sam: I'm not sure. All I know is that it would contaminate the samples. Don't touch it though.
Sam: What the hell were you thinking? Why did you do that? I just told you not to touch it.
Yara: What the hell was I thinking? What the hell were YOU thinking? Lyle is my fiance! What were you hoping to accomplish by doing this? I'm not going to stand here and let you carry on with this insane experiment of yours when it affects my future husband! I destroyed your damn box and ruined your demonstration!
Sam: But I didn't say destroying the box would cause the process to fail. I said it would contaminate. It still creates a baby, but now you took out Lyle's DNA, so it used your skin cells and mine.
Yara: What?! So you're saying that it made another child, and that child is our child? I can't fucking believe you. I'm going to get Lyle. He is going to be furious.
Sam: But everything I've ever seen on daytime TV says that when two people have a child together they are tied together forever. Lyle should be happy about that!
Yara: Why the hell would you think that?! You are a complete and utter idiot.
Sam: I'm not an idiot!
Lyle: Hey, baby. I thought I heard you shouting down here.
Yara: Oh, Lyle, I'm glad you're here. This idiot has built this machine which supposedly makes a child by combining DNA from two people. He mixed yours with his and made two kids, and once with mine for another kid. And he says he did it all to tie the two of you together forever.
Lyle: What?
Yara: You are absolutely un-fucking-believable. I cannot stress that enough. Lyle, you come and try to talk some sense into him.
Lyle: So, like, I'm a dad?
Lyle: Just what the hell were you thinking, Sam? Why would you think this would be an OK thing to do? I've told you before that I'm not interested in you.
Sam: But I thought this would make you like me. Quincey said-
Lyle: I don't give a damn what Quincey said. This is the worst thing you've ever done. I can't be friends with you anymore. I don't want to see you anymore. I want to go back home to my own time. Now. And Yara is coming with me.
Sam: Fine. I finished the time machine a while ago anyway. I just thought that after this you might change your mind. Come on, then.
Yara: What was that about stealing Lyle away from me forever again?
Sam: I'll never forgive you for this.
Yara: I'm sure I'll lose a lot of sleep worrying about that.
Yara was the first to go into the time machine.
Lyle: Go on head. I'll be on in a second. There's something I want to say.
Sam: I don't want you to go.
Lyle: I know, kid. But you have to admit, what you did was really fucking creepy. Camilla was right about you, after all. Speaking of, whatever happened to her?
Sam: She saw me taking pictures of you sleeping and threw down the pie she was making and said, "That's it!" and got in her car and left.
Lyle: Oh. Well, that's understandable.
Lyle: But you know, one day you will get over me. You'll find someone you can really be happy with, or someone who won't mind if you keep them locked away from the world. Maybe. Keep your chin up.
Sam: Bye, Lyle.
Downstairs, Bertram was dealing with the aftermath.
Bertram: Where did all these children come from? I sure hope that Master Sam is not engaging in anything illicit.
Sam: Well, baby. I guess it's just you and me and your brothers, now.
Next time, meet the babies, find out what Sam will do next, birthdays, etc.
FYI: the babies are named Thomas, Uriah, and Van. All three are virtuosos. All three are boys. They were made randomly via instababy in MasterController. I chose random gender, so I am all wtf about them all being male. Thomas and Uriah's parents are Lyle and Sam. Van's parents are Sam and Yara.
I wanted the love triangle to end up like this, but I couldn't figure out how to do it. ohsims so helpfully supplied the babynator idea. XD
Also, enjoy this lovely video as we follow Yara strutting around the house in search of Lyle. I lol'd pretty hard. XD
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