(no subject)
I hate becoming accustomed to a way of life only to have it change. They say that the only thing that doesn’t change is that things continue to change. Life changes are all too common when you hop bands so you’d think I get used to them, but I don’t. When Richard called it quits on the Verve, everything in my life changed rapidly. I wasn’t there as long as the others, but after that time, I was just left with nothing to do with my life except ponder getting a real job. It wasn’t as sudden as it might seem, and if you were there you could have seen it coming, but nevertheless, it changed things drastically for me and will always stick out in my mind as the biggest change I’ve gone through.
Right now nothing is changing for me, and I don’t know how to feel about it. There should be relief, but mostly there’s just quiet. I’m not a go-getter, I wait for opportunity to knock, but the stillness of life is unsettling right now. I don’t know why I have such a problem going and getting things myself, but something holds me back. Okay, a lot of things hold me back. It comes back to personalities and the discomfort in taking initiative.
I’ve been kind of disenchanted by people lately, myself included. We all go through periods where the human race makes you sick because everywhere you turn, there’s someone with the most fake facade you can imagine. It seems to run rampant around these parts, in this business. I get to a point where I’m too tired of it and I want nothing more than to ignore the world. Unfortunately I’m included in this, with those pretenses I throw up unnecessarily and I’m working on that.
In the meantime, if my balls, who decided to make an appearance, hit on you, I sincerely apologize. Who knew they had such a mind (a poetic one, at that) of their own.
Right now nothing is changing for me, and I don’t know how to feel about it. There should be relief, but mostly there’s just quiet. I’m not a go-getter, I wait for opportunity to knock, but the stillness of life is unsettling right now. I don’t know why I have such a problem going and getting things myself, but something holds me back. Okay, a lot of things hold me back. It comes back to personalities and the discomfort in taking initiative.
I’ve been kind of disenchanted by people lately, myself included. We all go through periods where the human race makes you sick because everywhere you turn, there’s someone with the most fake facade you can imagine. It seems to run rampant around these parts, in this business. I get to a point where I’m too tired of it and I want nothing more than to ignore the world. Unfortunately I’m included in this, with those pretenses I throw up unnecessarily and I’m working on that.
In the meantime, if my balls, who decided to make an appearance, hit on you, I sincerely apologize. Who knew they had such a mind (a poetic one, at that) of their own.