The Asparagus Awesomesauce 1.2
LAST TIME: Blueberry Asparagus came into existence and decided to be a ladies man. This plan was derailed by him meeting fancy. The double E cup goddess of his dreams. They had a nice wedding where they were stalked by some sims that seemed to know them. We join them now on their wedding night ooooohhh.
So then. Wedding night.
Blueberry: Zzzz gunna honey moon so hard
Blueberry: Zzzz name not girly, blueberries are manly zzzZ
Fancy is neat. Here are her stats.
Hopeless Romantic, Flirt, Neat, .... balls .... I forgot the rest.
We're going to egypt bitches!
Well, it is their honeymoon after all.
Blueberry: Fancy! Get back in here you're causing a scene!
Fancy: You're not the boss of me!
Indeed, she ventured out on her own.
Fancy had big dreams for her trip in egypt, most of which involved shopping and eating.
Blueberry: I'm really digging the idea of being an adventurer
and the award for worst pun goes to me!!
Fancy gets the most out of her vacation. This includes learning a song she'll never ever stop singing, and dancing with snakes.
Blueberry: I wonder what being married will be like.
It'll be even better if you bring her treasure!
Blueberry: I brought her treasure, she wont stop reading that book.
She's reading how to make your favorite food, jerk.
Blueberry simply can not stand being ignored. He decides his best course of action is to tell the food lady that her whole country smells funny. He's classy like that
Maybe you shouldn't pick fights with people who can kick your ass is all I'm saying.
I want you to notice all the fucks that Fancy gives.
Egypt is lovely but sometimes you begin to miss home. They hadn't even spent much time together
Blueberry: That one is called Urectom. It's my favorite
Brosef apparently doesn't like being woken up to the sound of matrimonial love making. Maybe he's jealous.
Never stop singing that song for the rest of her life.
Is this an episode of doctor who? Why is everyone running?
One last adventure before it's time to go home. Fancy decides to join him this time.
Blueberry: Baby, I knew you were the one for me. Now jump in that pool of questionable ancient water.
TEAM WORK!
Unfortunately they had to go home before they could find anything. Have a seque.
Back at home they enjoy Blueberry's favorite food. Schwarma (incidentally, also one of my favorite foods)
Fancy: This show is for you mail lady, they loved it in Egypt.
She's very tough, filling out thank you cards for her wedding.
Driving her old beater. I'm truly scared.
Fancy: it's that strange woman from my wedding, they always seem to be around!
I demolished the old house and built a new one. I like it better I think. That trampoline was a wedding gift from Brenna (aka makesomelove)
Blueberry: Before I left for work my house was smaller but had more stuff. Now it's bigger with less stuff.
Blueberry: I don't like this!
Don't question it my love.
As you may not remember, Blueberry's life ambition is to be a rocks star.
He writes a song about his weird changing house. Fancy feels oddly drawn to it.
Later that evening though, he feels oddly drawn to her rack which has been growing bigger. He can only assume it's because he wished for it very hard.
Blueberry is living the sweet life. A 1989 computer and a gorgeous wife. What more could a man ever possibly want?
Fancy: I don't know if you've noticed but ... I'm pregnant.
Blueberry: did she just say she has a present? Man, everytime I look at her I just picture her naked
Blueberry: What kind of present? IS IT AN X BOX?
Fancy: Dumb ass, I said I'm pregnant.
Blueberry: Oh ... pregnant. That's totally as cool as an xbox.
No it isn't.
Fancy doesn't really think being pregnant is as cool as an xbox either.
Life continues on in it's normal way. Fancy is asked by their friend (who's name I always forget) Emo hair to fix his tv. They need the cash to help furnish their new abode, so she agrees.
Fancy: Listen emo hair. I'm pregnant, so pretty soon I'm not going to be able to fix your tv ok? I gotta raise this baby.
Speaking of babies. The new xbox was pressing down on her bladder something terrible. She eventually had to stop at a neighbors to use their restroom.
Fancy: Oh god, it's that woman. She's pregnant too!
Fancy: Sorry I hope you don't mind, I really need to use your bathroom. I'm pregnant and sometimes you just have to go.
Sarah (AKA MY SELF SIM): It's ok Fancy. I've known you were pregnant since the begining.
Fancy was left with a weird feeling. Who was this woman and how did she know all the details of her life?
She would just have to find out!
AND THAT'S IT! I know it's getting weirdly meta and I just don't even care. The next update will be ... interesting. Switching computers shortly.
Thanks for reading!