Jamie's rational Thinking...
So ever since I moved back home there hasn't been one day that my sister has gone to school. I worry about her sometimes; she seems to live in this false reality that things will be spoon feed to her. She doesn’t realize how hard life will be because she never had to experience it. I just don't understand her sometimes. I had such a bad time growing up and have been through so much shit... they have it soooo easy. My mom will take them to school everyday feed them and make sure they have most of their wants and all of their needs. I feel so irritated thinking that if I had what they have I would have gone so much further in life. She has a very stable parent but all she wants to do is smoke and hang out with her useless emo friends, it makes me sick. I tried to have a discussion with her today. She argued that all a high school education is, is a piece of paper. I told her
"It's basic education Jamie, there are a lot of genius people without high school diplomas, but they are not going anywhere in life. No matter how smart you think you are you have to play society's game, whether you like it or not... you will always be a file to someone, a number, or an account... just because you think your special, doesn’t mean everyone else will think so... and that is the point of education, you cant expect the world to play your game, you must play the game by the worlds rules."
I think it was a good idea but I highly doubt I got thru to her, she is 15 and she knows everything. (rolls eyes) but you know I can't take care of her issues I have my own to worry about, I gave my advice and I told her what she needs to do, you can't force-feed people words and make them do anything with it... it's all up to her now and that scares the shit out of me.
My brother is doing kind of ok... better then Jamie anyway, which isn't exactly hard... but at least he goes to school, and at least he isn’t smoking and running around with useless kids... I just wish this family had some sort of structure and discipline... its so hard for me to concentrate on what’s important when everything is a mess, everyone is screaming, and nothing gets done like it's suppose to be. It's hard for me not to be able to control anything around me, and so I usually get depressed a lot here. But now that Noah is a part of my life I'm hoping I can absorb some motivation and happiness out of that.
I really want to start exercising again today, I'm starting to feel weak and a little sluggish so I think maybe it would do me a world of good, but as I said it's very hard to accomplish much in such an environment... as long as I stay a waist 34 I'm not to concerned. lol...
Anyway things will be better after a while, I just hope me and Noah have a relationship and can be happy in the mean time... I'm sick of my family making my relationships hard.
"It's basic education Jamie, there are a lot of genius people without high school diplomas, but they are not going anywhere in life. No matter how smart you think you are you have to play society's game, whether you like it or not... you will always be a file to someone, a number, or an account... just because you think your special, doesn’t mean everyone else will think so... and that is the point of education, you cant expect the world to play your game, you must play the game by the worlds rules."
I think it was a good idea but I highly doubt I got thru to her, she is 15 and she knows everything. (rolls eyes) but you know I can't take care of her issues I have my own to worry about, I gave my advice and I told her what she needs to do, you can't force-feed people words and make them do anything with it... it's all up to her now and that scares the shit out of me.
My brother is doing kind of ok... better then Jamie anyway, which isn't exactly hard... but at least he goes to school, and at least he isn’t smoking and running around with useless kids... I just wish this family had some sort of structure and discipline... its so hard for me to concentrate on what’s important when everything is a mess, everyone is screaming, and nothing gets done like it's suppose to be. It's hard for me not to be able to control anything around me, and so I usually get depressed a lot here. But now that Noah is a part of my life I'm hoping I can absorb some motivation and happiness out of that.
I really want to start exercising again today, I'm starting to feel weak and a little sluggish so I think maybe it would do me a world of good, but as I said it's very hard to accomplish much in such an environment... as long as I stay a waist 34 I'm not to concerned. lol...
Anyway things will be better after a while, I just hope me and Noah have a relationship and can be happy in the mean time... I'm sick of my family making my relationships hard.