It's about art... but mostly about me....
*blows dust and cobwebs off of my username and gently tries to shine up the journal*
.....
There's still not really anything for me to say. I'm depressed. I'm hurting. At times I'm kinda scared for myself.
Mostly... I just feel like a fraud. I don't like me anymore... I think it has to do with finding out that maybe I'm not what I thought I was.
I haven't felt like an artist since around the time I got out of college... I haven't felt like a writer for a _long_ time before that.
I'm lazy... Practice makes perfect and I just poke at the page and wish it could be done with.
It isn't exactly that I don't enjoy it anymore... Sometimes I still really love to draw. Something about it just feels wrong. Like I'm making my hands do something foreign despite the fact that this is what I got my fucking degree in...
....
Work has kinda sucked lately. That's about all I have to say tonight.
.....
There's still not really anything for me to say. I'm depressed. I'm hurting. At times I'm kinda scared for myself.
Mostly... I just feel like a fraud. I don't like me anymore... I think it has to do with finding out that maybe I'm not what I thought I was.
I haven't felt like an artist since around the time I got out of college... I haven't felt like a writer for a _long_ time before that.
I'm lazy... Practice makes perfect and I just poke at the page and wish it could be done with.
It isn't exactly that I don't enjoy it anymore... Sometimes I still really love to draw. Something about it just feels wrong. Like I'm making my hands do something foreign despite the fact that this is what I got my fucking degree in...
....
Work has kinda sucked lately. That's about all I have to say tonight.