Trial
So i've decided to give this a try without telling my boyfriend about it, as a way to vent on some of the on going frustrations in my life regarding our "marriage" discussions.
Not that it matters but for those of you out there who want part of the story, here it is.
My boyfriend and i have been dating for almost 2 years now. We recently decided that we'd like to get married. However, the kicker is that as a result of his religion, we need to get permission from both his parents and mine. We ended up flying to visit his parents for the weekend to ask them if we could get married. What resulted has left me trying to remain confident about the situation while not giving in to my desire to throttle them both. To make a long story short they made a number of comments that i couldn't help but take personally and told us they'd think about it. Upon our return home, they haven't bothered to communicate with us and only discussed things with us after i forced my bf to call them to see what was going on.
As it turns out, they're not confident that we're "ready" to get married. They're worried about our inability to communicate (it's how they percieve us..not how we are in truth) and therefore don't want to grant us permission yet. They have stated though that they will eventually give us permission...once they feel confident that we're "ready." Time frame? Oh....whenever they're confident...could be a few days...could be months...years.
My parents on the other hand, find the idea of "permission" to be an outdated custom which has no place in their life. However, to please their daughter they've agreed to participate in the process because they know it's important to my boyfriend. However, the longer the "wait" goes on, the more frustrated they get because they feel we should be free to make our own decisions and live our own life. They're upset because they know it's tough on "their baby" but also don't understand why his parents can't just accept that we will make our own way in the world. They understand that my bf's parents see it as a huge responsibility but if they're going to say "yes" anyway, why wait? His parents can still support us while we get on our way with things.
Not that it matters but for those of you out there who want part of the story, here it is.
My boyfriend and i have been dating for almost 2 years now. We recently decided that we'd like to get married. However, the kicker is that as a result of his religion, we need to get permission from both his parents and mine. We ended up flying to visit his parents for the weekend to ask them if we could get married. What resulted has left me trying to remain confident about the situation while not giving in to my desire to throttle them both. To make a long story short they made a number of comments that i couldn't help but take personally and told us they'd think about it. Upon our return home, they haven't bothered to communicate with us and only discussed things with us after i forced my bf to call them to see what was going on.
As it turns out, they're not confident that we're "ready" to get married. They're worried about our inability to communicate (it's how they percieve us..not how we are in truth) and therefore don't want to grant us permission yet. They have stated though that they will eventually give us permission...once they feel confident that we're "ready." Time frame? Oh....whenever they're confident...could be a few days...could be months...years.
My parents on the other hand, find the idea of "permission" to be an outdated custom which has no place in their life. However, to please their daughter they've agreed to participate in the process because they know it's important to my boyfriend. However, the longer the "wait" goes on, the more frustrated they get because they feel we should be free to make our own decisions and live our own life. They're upset because they know it's tough on "their baby" but also don't understand why his parents can't just accept that we will make our own way in the world. They understand that my bf's parents see it as a huge responsibility but if they're going to say "yes" anyway, why wait? His parents can still support us while we get on our way with things.