(no subject)
I haven't written in a long time.
There are a lot of reasons and excuses that I can give, but they would all fall short.
I'm tired. Tired of the fake people, the drama.... I just can't stand how people can look you in the eye, call you their best friend and then turn around and parrot anything you've ever told them in confidence to someone else. There are too many words that I could use to describe people like that. But, like my excuses for not updating sooner, they too would all fall short.
My own sister spouts evil words of hatred and abuse to my parents about me. To me even. She physically attacks me when she doesn't like something I have to say. And instead of taking personal responsibilty for her wrong-doings she tries to deflect blame, accusing my boyfriend, Steve of verbally abusing her, and stealing from our parents.
I am just so sick, so sick.
The last week has just been miserable... but I keep trying to put on a happy face. No one wants to be around someone who's in a bad mood all the time. And I really have been working on looking at the brighter things in life. I do. Because I want to. I know that there are good things around, and I see them.
I just wish that I could keep those things in sight, instead of having them blacked out by the evil around me. People always bitch about too much drama... well, don't start it, perpetuate it, or repeat it and you won't have to worry about it.
I'm not perfect, I'm not saying I am. But I have apologized to most of those I have wronged... and I sincerely hope they forgive me. Because I strive every day to be a good friend to those I care about. Because that's all I'd ever want in return. That's all anyone ever wants. A good friend. Such a simple concept, but such a hard thing to find in anyone anymore.
If you've be a true friend to me, thank you. If you've had my back when someone's tried to start something or say something about me... THANK YOU. But if you've been fake, said things about me behind my back, or to others who don't like me... then get out of my life. I don't need you, and you certainly don't feel like you need me.
There are a lot of reasons and excuses that I can give, but they would all fall short.
I'm tired. Tired of the fake people, the drama.... I just can't stand how people can look you in the eye, call you their best friend and then turn around and parrot anything you've ever told them in confidence to someone else. There are too many words that I could use to describe people like that. But, like my excuses for not updating sooner, they too would all fall short.
My own sister spouts evil words of hatred and abuse to my parents about me. To me even. She physically attacks me when she doesn't like something I have to say. And instead of taking personal responsibilty for her wrong-doings she tries to deflect blame, accusing my boyfriend, Steve of verbally abusing her, and stealing from our parents.
I am just so sick, so sick.
The last week has just been miserable... but I keep trying to put on a happy face. No one wants to be around someone who's in a bad mood all the time. And I really have been working on looking at the brighter things in life. I do. Because I want to. I know that there are good things around, and I see them.
I just wish that I could keep those things in sight, instead of having them blacked out by the evil around me. People always bitch about too much drama... well, don't start it, perpetuate it, or repeat it and you won't have to worry about it.
I'm not perfect, I'm not saying I am. But I have apologized to most of those I have wronged... and I sincerely hope they forgive me. Because I strive every day to be a good friend to those I care about. Because that's all I'd ever want in return. That's all anyone ever wants. A good friend. Such a simple concept, but such a hard thing to find in anyone anymore.
If you've be a true friend to me, thank you. If you've had my back when someone's tried to start something or say something about me... THANK YOU. But if you've been fake, said things about me behind my back, or to others who don't like me... then get out of my life. I don't need you, and you certainly don't feel like you need me.