Random Reflections on Life
Update on interview status: Phone interview went well, in my opinion. However, not well enough. I never received a phone call for a second interview, nor have my follow up emails been responded to. End result, no job.
What does this mean?
Well, when I first moved up here I gave myself til the end of April to find a job. If I found one, I could stay here. If I couldn't find one, I would return home and save up again to try later on. Since I haven't found a job and the end of April is nigh, not to mention my family is coming to visit this weekend, my only choice is to return home.
I don't regret leaving home, however. Yes, I've spent more than I originally planned and I pretty much withdrew from school, but I don't regret it because I enjoyed every second of it. From the moment I stepped foot into Aaron's car, up until now it's all been a wonderful adventure. I've learned alot about myself, my beliefs, my values, my thoughts. I've found out who I am. It was an invaluable experience. And even though he may not love me back, I know I have found the man I love, truly love. And no matter how harsh it may be to know that I cannot have him the way in which my heart longs for, I can be happy knowing I have his friendship and at least some small part of his heart as his friend.
I feel I've grown as a person. I once said that I felt I was meant to be in people's lives for a reason and once that purpose was fulfilled I'd move on. I believe we all are meant to be in each others paths for one purpose or another; some fleeting, some lasting. But I now know that this is not all there is for me. In the past, I was confused about who I was and what my purpose was. I may not know the full extent of my purpose on this earth, but I know who I am now. And knowing that, I am free find my own happiness and path in life. I am free to be who I am.
There is one solid piece of advice I would give to you who read this entry. And that advice is to never allow others to oppress who you are. Whether it be in the name of love (family, friends, or significant others) or pride or anything else, be yourself. Be true to your ideals, values, beliefs, mind, body, soul, and heart. If people cannot accept you for who you are, they aren't worthy of your friendship or love. And they will never know what they were missing, what was right before their eyes. Don't ever let anyone change you, you will regret it. And if you ever find yourself lost, not knowing who you are anymore, take time away from those that are the cause of that feeling, and reflect. Remember your past, your present, and let your true self determine your future.
What does this mean?
Well, when I first moved up here I gave myself til the end of April to find a job. If I found one, I could stay here. If I couldn't find one, I would return home and save up again to try later on. Since I haven't found a job and the end of April is nigh, not to mention my family is coming to visit this weekend, my only choice is to return home.
I don't regret leaving home, however. Yes, I've spent more than I originally planned and I pretty much withdrew from school, but I don't regret it because I enjoyed every second of it. From the moment I stepped foot into Aaron's car, up until now it's all been a wonderful adventure. I've learned alot about myself, my beliefs, my values, my thoughts. I've found out who I am. It was an invaluable experience. And even though he may not love me back, I know I have found the man I love, truly love. And no matter how harsh it may be to know that I cannot have him the way in which my heart longs for, I can be happy knowing I have his friendship and at least some small part of his heart as his friend.
I feel I've grown as a person. I once said that I felt I was meant to be in people's lives for a reason and once that purpose was fulfilled I'd move on. I believe we all are meant to be in each others paths for one purpose or another; some fleeting, some lasting. But I now know that this is not all there is for me. In the past, I was confused about who I was and what my purpose was. I may not know the full extent of my purpose on this earth, but I know who I am now. And knowing that, I am free find my own happiness and path in life. I am free to be who I am.
There is one solid piece of advice I would give to you who read this entry. And that advice is to never allow others to oppress who you are. Whether it be in the name of love (family, friends, or significant others) or pride or anything else, be yourself. Be true to your ideals, values, beliefs, mind, body, soul, and heart. If people cannot accept you for who you are, they aren't worthy of your friendship or love. And they will never know what they were missing, what was right before their eyes. Don't ever let anyone change you, you will regret it. And if you ever find yourself lost, not knowing who you are anymore, take time away from those that are the cause of that feeling, and reflect. Remember your past, your present, and let your true self determine your future.