(no subject)
When you have a very limited amount of close people to you (both emotionally and geographically), things slide proportionately out of balance when just one of your key players does something outside the normal routine. And you're left staring at the sky, half angry over the situation. It's the fact that that person can go on and have fun with other people, while you are officially gimped until everything is perfectly put back in place. But then you have to realize that it's your own damn fault that you don't have a larger inner circle of people in your life.
And then of course, you say to yourself that you will gain more confidants so that this never happens again. But guess what? You'll never really put forth the effort and so you just set yourself up again.
PS. It's really not even half as bad as this sounds. I'm just being over-dramatic. However, I don't want to always hold your hand and do everything for you. I don't want to have to worry over my shoulder that you are doing everything that you should. I don't want to always have to take care of everything, make it right, and be responsible every waking moment. That's more burden than any human being should have to shoulder.
PPS. All I ever wanted was to spend every moment with you, but that was never good enough for you, ever.
PPPS. I'll regret this post in the morning I'm sure.
And then of course, you say to yourself that you will gain more confidants so that this never happens again. But guess what? You'll never really put forth the effort and so you just set yourself up again.
PS. It's really not even half as bad as this sounds. I'm just being over-dramatic. However, I don't want to always hold your hand and do everything for you. I don't want to have to worry over my shoulder that you are doing everything that you should. I don't want to always have to take care of everything, make it right, and be responsible every waking moment. That's more burden than any human being should have to shoulder.
PPS. All I ever wanted was to spend every moment with you, but that was never good enough for you, ever.
PPPS. I'll regret this post in the morning I'm sure.