The Picklesworth Legacy 7.5 + Heir Poll
Haaaaaaaa, I can't believe it's already time for another one of these! But first, we must get through all of that frenzied rubbing of heads. And no, that's not as dirty as it sounds, you cads.
Elise! Light of my life, the shining jewel of Simdom, my freckled queen! Would you be so inclined as to end this noogie war before the scalp burn casualties take their toll?
Elise: PFFFFT WHAT DO YOU TAKE ME FOR
I guess flattery wasn't the way to go, then.
Oh yes, PLEASE expand your brutal reign of terror, that's just what we need! Look at Elise's face. This was her plan all along, that devious warlady!
Tommy: Save meeeee
HOW DO YOU CRAZY KIDS STILL HAVE SKIN ON YOUR KNUCKLES? THIS IS ABSURD. And then I stopped photographing the continuing madness because there is only so much follicle violence I can take!
Phoebe: Awww, they look like they're having fun! :D
Catalina: Is that what you crazy kids do these days?
This isn't a new fad, it is a time-honoured tradition! Oh, how soon we forget the noogies of our youth.
The rest of the family is super invested in the TV happenings. Could it be an intense match on the sports channel? A crazy plot twist in Sim city's hottest soap opera? Breaking news at 11!???
A PIZZA COMMERCIAL? *APOPLECTIC* I assume it's because they forgot to withhold the onions. Those fiends!
Elise: Wait... Why isn't she giving him a noogie!?? 8O
Because SOMEONE in this household has to keep their knuckle skin smooth and moisturized.
This picture amuses me. Elise was working out to get a body point for her job and Catalina decided to lie on the couch and stare at her, all: "PFFFFF I scoff at your feeble sit-ups, Granddaughter!"
Everyone is spending the evening with the ever popular SSX3 franchise. Everyone... except Mirabelle that is! I am sending her out on a date with that gnome thief against my better judgement.
No, I don't care how much you swoon over her. If I catch you shoplifting, I will make Mirabelle bolt out of that lot so fast that she'll flatten the Roadrunner on her way home.
Both of them wanted some photos to commemorate the date, so sure. All they're missing are those crazy stickers and sparkles and 5000x more exposure to really make them shine.
Hilda: A CUT OF YOUR FINEST CHOPS, MY GOOD MAN! BTW, my rich girlfriend is paying.
Their adorable waiter is politely puzzled. All of the tips for you! <3 And check out his equally cute colleague in the background, teehee!
Mirabelle: Oh baby, you know just how to make me swoon! *Blows kiss*
Bah. I would prefer someone who didn't steal family heirlooms but I guess that's asking too much.
Oh man, that looks gooooood. *Still waiting for tabbouleh to cool in the fridge*
Sure, it was a successful date, but all I'm saying is that Hilda is probably distracting her while she steals her earrings right now. GNOME THIEVES ARE AN UNTRUSTWORTHY LOT.
Back home, I found Elise spreading her reign of terror over a neutral party.
Phoebe: Did you seriously just noogie me?
Phoebe: Ha ha! You got me there! *Thumbs up*
Elise: See, that's the reaction everyone should be having!
Phoebe, you are just too nice for your own good. ;3; *Smushes cheeks*
Meanwhile, Tommy demonstrates his expert pouting gesture! Watch as he sways his head from side to side like a pro! Marvel at his rhythmic foot tapping! Gasp at... yeaaaah. Look, the boy is more boring than the dirt clod from my grow-your-own-tomato kit currently sitting on my windowsill. What can I tell ya.
So let's move on to whatever Phoebe's doing. Being a Family Sim, falling in red hearts with somebody is at the top of her priorities. I figure that a little supernatural help wouldn't hurt her prospects. Make it rain men! Or one man, preferably. If it really did rain men, that'd be lethal for everyone involved.
Matchmaker: Alright, now peer reaaaaal close in here!
Phoebe: *Bathed in magic glow* I... I think I see something!
Matchmaker: Nah, I just use this little party trick to impress the clients. Ain't it cool?
He's... eh.
I mean, Greg. He's Greg.
Greg: *Gasps* I can't believe that such a pretty girl wants to have fun with me! I am so lucky!
Ugggh, I just noticed how bare this hood is. I've been too lazy to decorate it properly, so ominous dead trees it'll have to be.
And then they had a nice game of catch amid falling snow. No baseballs of death around here!
Greg: *Swoon* Oh, please do not come too close! I can't handle so much beauty before me~
Greg: *Moan* And you have the hands of a goddess!
He was really into everything Phoebe said and did. What a passionate first encounter.
Well, this is all we really need from him anyway. Gracias for the first kiss aspiration boost! The Sims 2 game appreciates your contribution to the community.
ORLY? I never would've guessed from the way you kept on gushing like a broken fountain.
I caught Mirabelle hitting her head against the controller. Another little animation I only recently discovered! Oh Sims, how you surprise me still after all these years. Ivy must be slaughtering her on the those dangerous virtual slopes.
Hilda was wandering the lot, so before she could get her grubby little paws over Gnomey O'Shamrock number 450245, I got Mirabelle to swoop in and ask her to go steady. That should take her mind off of ceramic fairytale creatures!
Hilda: Of course! <3 <3 <3
D'awwww. Alright, this made my heart a little more tepid.
Mirabelle: Now that we're official, I can do this!
Hilda: AAAACCCKK
Hilda: WHY DID SHE DO THAT??? D8
You're dating a poopoohead. Don't worry, your skull will learn to love the pain.
Mirabelle is pretending like nothing ever happened. I know your true nature, missy! You can't hide it by doing the dishes for everyone! Also hai, John. Nice to see you are still alive and functioning.
Tommy has started to get frequent calls from a townie I've yet to see in person. Who is this lady?
Tommy: Nobody! God, it's like I have 3 parents!
YOU SURE DO, MISTER. >:T No Sim of mine is going to forge a relationship with a mystery person who gets up to who-knows-what in the invisible townie void!
Well, poop and scoop. This is what happens when you don't clean that llama mascot suit from work. The things a Sim'll do for the love of the game!
Greg: *Tries to casually stroll into the house*
Nobody invited you and your crush is on the phone. AWAY WITH YOU! *Waves off like a bad fart*
Cesar: *Watches Greg leave* What a strange boy...
Indeed.
Oh look, Tommy's right where I left him. Surely you're getting a bit tired of tapping your foot to a catchy tune, BB.
Tommy: Well then I'll rock with my hands!
Tommy: *HARDCORE*
Good lad! Keep the music alive! *Jigs*
Ruh-roh. Time to take preventative measures!
A pillow over the face stops the germs from spreading, right?
Cesar: *HACKING UP HIS LIVER*
His coughs were honestly very intense that I was actually concerned over the welfare of a bunch of pixels. Kudos to you, voice actor for elder male Sims. I wish you a long and prosperous career!
Catalina will brave bacteria just to be close to her husband. And you know what, if anyone can tame those microscopic bringers of doom, it's her.
Though I'm not sure that eating outdoors in the cold is going to help Cesar on the road to recovery. Besides, those gnarly trees don't really add to the romance. I will decorate this hood eventually.
You know, this got me to wondering what exactly a marmoset sounds like. Now, youtube will probably not have any videos of a marmoset with a bad cold because that would just be a dream come true. So I went a-hunting for a perfectly healthy marmoset to listen to. For the curious and the tolerant of squeaky sounds.
Check out this dapper fellow one of the kids brought home. I will always associate this particular hairstyle with my gen. 2 heir Hugh. This is just making me more excited for the heir trip down memory lane I will write up once Gen. 10 rolls around. For now, I bestow my completely non-existent Seal of Approval™ upon this worthy lad!
Catalina: So do I!
Elton: Wanna hear about my vacation in Guam?
Elise: NO I DO NOT
Elise: Look man, I'm just here to give you a noogie!
Elton: Well I never! *Dramatic huff*
Elise was disappointed that he would not stand for this malarky. When a man styles his hair like that, it means that he is above your juvenile wars! *Adjusts monocle*
Elise: Whatever! I've got other guys to torment!
Tommy: Spare meeeeee
Siiiiigghhh... There is no armistice in sight.
What else do you do the instant you get out of bed but pull out your DS and immediately get to playing? Considering that Mirabelle's pyjama pants have no pockets, I wonder where she stashes it. It's a mystery to rival Roanoke!
Cesar: A scented pink letter? Whatever could it be?
I don't know but it's expelling hearts! CALL THE EXTERMINATOR
Cesar: Oh my! To my snuggly-poo Mirabelle, from Hilda. What a lovely thing to send!
Why are you grinning harder than Michael Fassbender? Just slip it through the schoolbus window before it leaves.
Well, I do like Cesar's reaction faces to things. Look at that how he gazes in wonder at the snowfall outside! Within that wrinkled raisin of a body beats the heart of a child still.
John is still alive, by-the-by. He and Ivy have been working tirelessly behind the scenes while I've spent the update focused on the kids. But hey, they need the exposure to sway the votes!
John: Are you trying to cheat me!?
Catalina is so determined not to get caught that she will punch her hand holding John's pawn into the wall in a desperate bid to hide the evidence. The lady has never done anything halfway!
Oh John, you handsome fool.
Catalina: Heh heh, suckerrrrr
Tommy: Unfff! It's good to be alive!
Yeaaah, about that...
Grimm: You. Me. Heaven's Lounge, 8 o'clock. It's Mai Tai Monday!
Cesar: Boy howdy! Eternal drinks are on me! :D
Well, no more cute reaction shots from my favourite mailman. It's been a slice, Cesar! I'm glad you had a happily oblivious marriage. :'D
Phoebe + Elise: *DEVASTATED*
Tommy + Mirabelle: *CONSIDERABLY LESS DEVASTATED*
I... don't know what to tell you guys. Pokemon before perishing grandfathers?
Ivy didn't go outside to witness Cesar's death in all its tiki glory, but she did grieve privately inside the house. They guy was more of a father to her than her biological waiter father, who turned out to be a bit of a douchecanoe.
Catalina: What's going on? :D
She got out of her work car right after Cesar popped his clogs, so she doesn't have the same bad memory that everyone else got. That being said, DO NOT LOOK BEHIND YOU BB. Only pain and suffering can be found there.
Guess who decided to board the insensitive train. HI JOHN. HOW DOES IT FEEL TO HAVE NO HEART.
John: Everything is sparkles and rainbows, isn't it, son?
IS THIS REALLY THE TIME? I suppose this is a nice break from the noogies, but I still shake my head. The mourning process does not involve the flying of feathers, dammit!
Fine, we'll just let the other family members show them how grieving is done. *Huffs*
Catalina: *Protests Cesar's death by sleeping outside rather than alone in her cold, empty bed*
OK, so everyone has their own method. I'm not sure that Cesar would want you to have a casual fling with Mr. Frostbite, though!
You know what actually does help with the grieving process? CHESS! Sure, Battleship got its own movie but Chess got a musical.
Tommy: WOOOOOH! CHEAT SOME MORE!
Tommy, you rebel! *Hand to chest*
Fluffy domestic pictures are good for a simmer's soul. With a guest appearance by this lovely redhead with questionable taste in legging patterns!
Phoebe: Uuuuggggh this bathroom is grooossss!
Patience! There is a reason I employed a sculpted, silky-haired man maid to heave his long, hard mop over the dripping floor. So that he can do his job and clean the place and get paid for it, doi.
I wasn't expecting a haunting so soon! Cesar, I know you've been incorporeal for a short time, but surely you can't complain about eternal luaus!
Cesar: I just came to admire my wife. Goodness, she is still as pretty as a pearl!
How... adorable? Creepy? I, uh... I might be torn on the matter.
Oh, well now that's just rude. :T I mean sure, John didn't so much as blink at your passing, but you don't have to deal with the urinary aftermath.
Catalina: Did you know that Mirabelle's kissing skills are average?
Phoebe: GASP
And, uh... you would know this how?
Earlier that day
Mirabelle + Hilda: *SMACKING NOISES*
Catalina: Eh. I've seen better.
Well we can't all be changing booth contortionists!
Catalina is still quick to hand out all the huggles before I ship the kids off to college. You know, that tedious lifestage that makes us simmers sob uncontrollably into our keyboards (and if that doesn't happen to you, then you are made of stronger stuff than I. *Salutes*)
Tommy: So this is what post-secondary education looks like!
Welcome to your brick palace for the next four years! I'm playing in a smaller, one-floor dorm this time around in the hopes that it'll lessen the lag that college tends to give me. Sometimes it can get slower than the lovechild between a snail and a sloth. A snoth, if you will.
Alright gadies and lentlemen! It's time to vote. Who do YOU want to see be fruitful and multiply in the main household?
Mirabelle Picklesworth
Taurus 5/3/5/7/3
Pleasure | LTW: Become Game Designer
Turn-ons: Cologne, black hair
Turn-off: Hats
She is a battle-hardened noogie veteran!
Elise Picklesworth
Gemini 4/8/9/3/1
Knowledge | LTW: Become Space Pirate
Turn-ons: Swimsuits, glasses
Turn-off: Stink
Or perhaps she is the true noogie conqueror!
Tommy Picklesworth
Virgo 8/1/5/5/5
Popularity | LTW: Become Celebrity Chef
Turn-ons: Brown hair, creativity
Turn-off: Red hair
He tried to be a noogie warrior, but was sadly distracted by music a lot.
Phoebe Picklesworth
Leo 4/10/4/1/6
Family | LTW: Reach Golden Anniversary
Turn-ons: Fat, logic
Turn-off: Charisma
The only one with no leg in this noogie race. <3 Also, she broke the blue-eyed curse, just sayin'.
Poll Gen. 7 Heir Poll
Aaaand I'm going to go get dessert now. Toodleloo!