The Picklesworth Legacy 5.2
Who wants one more update before the New Year (where I am, at least)?
On the last update, these two became old but their passion still burns as strong as an oil lamp! I think. I can't remember the last time I was near an oil lamp. Also, Hugh died mere hours after Helene's busy wedding.
Also, this little bundle of goo was born. You can imagine how ecstatic John-Bob is to have babies in the house again. So ecstatic that he will not. Put. Dario. Down. He needs to sleeeeep
O hey, look who's come to visit!
Grim: Blanche Picklesworth, you get your choice of our deluxe Afterlife packages, complete with free toothbrush to stave off corpse breath!
Blanche: Ooooh. Does it come with free halo gear?
Helene: BOOOOOHOOOOOOHOOOOOOOO
Hula zombies: Do not fear, mortal one. We will take your grandmother's soul and clasp it to our bosoms forever.
Ain't that the way we all want to go?
Blanche: See ya!
Aw, she looks so happy to become incorporeal. Probably because she'll be with Hugh again. ADIEU BLANCHE. KEEP YOUR AFTERLIFE HEDGES TRIMMED. DON'T TALK TO STRANGER GHOSTS.
3 out of 4 platinum graves isn't so bad, is it? I believe I deserve some kind of reward!
*Dons Indiana Jones hat and droprolls to kitchen for reward, preferably of the chocolate kind*
Keith: You mean there's going to be another ghost roaming around? How will we ever get any sleep?
Well, in my generosity, I put you guys upstairs so that your elderly bladders may be spared the horror. Let the younguns get a good haunting. It gets the heart going!
Poor John-Bob was at work when his mother died, but he spent a good hour or so sighing with enough melancholia to bring John Keats back to life.
Helene: Welp! You know what destroys grief? A LOT OF SEX!
Amos: Yaaaaay
I am okay with this.
Helene: Hey there, girl! How do you feel about getting it on with Rocko, huh? Because hell if I'm going to be the only pregnant, hormonal one in the house again!
Glimmer: Keeping patting my head and I will do whatever you want.
Rocko unfortunately, wasn't so compliant. I guess he's still stinging from Glimmer's snub last update.
Rocko: YOU HAD YOUR CHANCE
All they needed was a relationship boost of course, so I directed them to play with each other several times until they were nice and friendly.
And then he put his thingie in her you-know-what and they DID IT.
Father-son bonding. 'Tis a beautiful thing.
Mostly because Mom is too busy horking her guts out in the bathroom and dammit if I'm going to let the grandparents hog all the time with Dario.
Look who came to visit! I love when spares autonomously pass by the lot and wait to be invited in. I will invite them in every single time. EVERY. TIME.
Please don't make the newly impregnated cat dance for your amusement. Her hunger bar is turning scarlet as we speak! D:
Hugh! How's it going, buddy?
Hugh: The Great Sim Beyond is not how I imagined it.
Uh... how so?
Hugh: There are no elysian fields! No choirs of Sim angels! There is no ambrosia flowing from the heavens. There's a loud nightclub where all the crazy kids keep going with hula zombie bouncers and the drink prices are murder. :(
Oh... Just... go to the Afterlife country club or something.
Other than going :'( in every room, Hugh is a well behaved ghost who doesn't scare anybody. Which is fantastic, because I don't need anyone distracting Genevieve while she feeds her nephew. The lady has three of these little boogers angels at home, she's got this.
Helene: WELCOME, SIS!
This is how she thanks Gen for taking care of Dario. I AM OKAY WITH THIS ALSO. Gosh, we've come a long way from the noogies and the static shocks
Helene: *POP* OH MY GOSH DID YOU SEE THAT?
I did! Glimmer didn't though. Her hormones have got her to wishing she could do some light human reading.
Times like these where she's too hungry to properly cook, I thank the stars I have a juicer wherein one glass constitutes as a meal. PREGNANCY LIFESAVERS, THESE.
Time for Dario's genetic inheritance to really start shining! Give me face-squishingly-cute!
I detect Picklesworth lips! Maybe mouth... it certainly looks more like Helene's than Amos'. He does have his mama's cheeky grin, I can tell you that right away (also 1 nice points, it's just assholes from here on out, it seems).
We get straight to the skill building! Left foot, right foot, fill that purple bar and go go go!
Amos: *Sigh*
Hello, Armani? I have a potential new model for you. He's got the pouty lips and the bedroom eyes skills down pat. He's going to be the next Zoolander! That look he's selling is like his "Magnum". He calls it "Poh-tee Trayneeng". I think it's French.
It even comes in 2 different variations! "Bedroom" and "Ate all the cookies". How could you not sign him up!?
Dario: Yes! Yesss! Give me more attention!
Dario: Bear!
John-Bob: EEEEEH! *Hyperventilates*
Teaching a baby is like nirvana to a Family Sim. John-Bob was just rolling wants left and right to do everything with him. It is starting to get a little disconcerting.
And we have another baby on the way, HOW WILL HE DIVIDE HIS TIME!???
Keith totally spends time with his grandson too, don't get me wrong. It's just that he's a Romance Sim, so spying on the neighbours' bedrooms is more his thing.
Oh my God, he has turned into a lecherous old man.
Before we get more Sim babies, we get baby kittens! Watch as Glimmer practically... er, glimmers with the new arrival!
It's a girl! I named her Squeak, because the meows of kittens sound a bit squeaky to me.
Hey, you. You're a father.
Rocko: DUN CARE THE BIRD IS WITHIN MY GRASP
Helene's pregnancy is making her extra maternal and she freaking loves Squeak. She was cuddling her like a dreaded cuddle monster, rubbing that fur all over her face and everything.
Helene: WAIT NO I CHANGED MY MIND I DON'T LIKE BIRTH AAAAARRGGHGHGHGHG
And as Helene pushed from her plumbob, John-Bob, having finished his business, felt his own start to shine as bright as a star. He could feel his aspiration bar rise, rise, rise until it reached a glorious apex of euphoria and ecstasy. The divine number 25,000 appeared above him, showering him in points that seemed to whisper: "Well done, my son."
He had gotten seven grandchildren. He was complete.
Yes, seven. Dario was the first born of Generation 5, and if you've read my last spare update then you know that Felicia had one child and Genevieve had triplets, bringing the total number of grandkids to 5. And now Helene just had twins! This is Naomi, who looks to be a clone of her brother.
And Catalina, who finally inherits Amos' black hair. (Those dark blue eyes are the next thing I'mma try to change, though).
Catalina: Oh, I see. My sister gets to be put straight into her crib while I get the cold floor treatment.
Squeak: OH MY GOODNESS A GIANT WORM IN THE KITCHEN
Keith: Pee-yew! Dario, I hate to break it to you but your concert stinks more than Pepe Le Pew at a cheese convention!
Two year olds are not exempt from Keith Picklesworth's criticism.
Keith: What? It's nothing a few years of practice won't fix. Who wants to be the world's best xylophonist? Eh?
That would indeed be a unique musician title.
Dario: Kitty!
Squeak: HALP HALP MOM ONE OF THE WORMS GOT ME
Dario: ♥♥♥
Squeak: This worm is very cuddly
*_______* I am in awe
THIS IS NOT WHAT IT LOOKS LIKE. I did not leave Catalina abandoned in the snow. D: But at one point, she was glitching something fierce. Anytime I would direct an adult to interact with her, nothing would happen. No one could do anything with her (she was lying in crap-filled diapers for half a day, it was balaegjshg). I was afraid she'd starve because no one could feed her and then the social worker would come in complete with Vader music, so I force errored her and deleted her, saved and then left the house, went back in and BAM. She was lying in the snow. BUT I COULD PICK HER UP SO HALLELUJAH.
Dario is finally ready to be a big boy! Which is great because his sisters are growing up soon and they'll be needing all the attention. Autonomous children are such a beautiful thing! T_T *Sniffs*
Dario: *+1000 GROWTH SPURT* DO I WIN A PRIZE?
YES. You win the prestigious honour of cleaning the litterbox. Mwaha. Mwahahaha.
DEM LIPS. I... I guess they could come from Amos since he's pretty pouty, but Helene's lips are also very full. In fact, he looks a lot like she did as a child, I think. The face shape might be more Amos', though.
*cough* Apologies for spamming you with my genetic nitpickings. ^^; It's a bit of a fascination.
Dario: Growing up is hard work.
Excuse you, none of that 'sleep on the sofa' shit, mister.
Dario: Fine then, I'll play with the cats!
Cute, but that's not what I had in mind!
Dario: *Siiigh*
You thought I was kidding about cleaning the litterbox, didn't you? HAAAAAAAA.
Dario: Hello, baby sister! How's it feel being in Grandpa's arms? :D Gosh, I remember it like it was yesterday!
It was yesterday, you silly boy.
Dario: What's that? I like you more than our other poopy sister? Yes, I do! :O
Is there a factor in determining how much a Sim child likes his younger siblings when they're born? Because Dario's relationship with Naomi was at 23, but with Catalina it was a -1. Is it because she's a brunette like you? I'm genuinely curious.
What Big Brother looks like, from Baby vantage point. Gosh, that's terrifying.
Let's direct that creepy face to the computer monitor, who will not even flinch if you sit in front of it naked.
Once again, John-Bob monopolizes the babies' time. Don't you want to... I dunno, spend time with your husband?
John-Bob: NOPE. THERE ARE TINY CREATURES GENETICALLY RELATED TO ME IN THE HOUSE I KNOW MY CALLING.
Doesn't help that the parents are too busy macking on each other to take care of their twins.
Dario: They are blocking my path and making me see things I don't want to see! D: MOVE_OBJECTS ME, PLEASE
O hai Blanche! You showed up earlier than I expected!
Blanche: What the hell is this dirty room doing in my house?
Uh... that's the garage. It's always looked like this.
Blanche: I demand you change it!
Well, I like it like this just fi-
-iiisfgkajshfgkasjfg Would you look at that, looks like my nightmare fuel gauge is up to full.
Birthdays already? Oh boy.
Guess who's twirling one of the babies? I bet you're all surprised.
John-Bob: EEEEEEEEH <3
Catalina: Grandfather, please. I don't deserve all this praise. Just kidding, keep going I'm loving this
D'awwwwww.
And Naomi! Gosh, these cutie pataters are trying to steal my heart.
And immediately afterwards, it's plop-down-and-get-speaking-lessons-from-Grandpa time. Were you expecting anything else?
Dario: Mom! Save me from the perils of homework!
GET BACK HERE, YOU. *grumble grumble*dropping queue to hug parent*grumble*total poppycock*mumble*
Keith: DAYYUUUMMM who is that studmuffin Helene brought home from work?
I have no idea, but he's got brown hair and those dark blue eyes that freaking everyone in this family has, so he won't be donating his sperm anytime soon to the legacy cause.
Dario: I WANT TO SLEEP RARARARAR
Amos: Son, I've been busy at work trying to destroy the Master Control Program, let me tell you about tired.
Dammit John-Bob, leave the girls' rooms and go to sleep! Let the parents do some freaking parenting!
... Oh, well never mind then. (ACR YOU'VE DONE IT AGAIN)
Naomi: Who needs parents when you're this cute, am I right or am I right?
Well someone's got to keep you kids from playing captain with the toilet bowl! No, Catalina! Step away!
In the other bathroom too? Have you no shame? (Or at least some bacterial aversion?)
Catalina: This is important work I'm doing.
Amos: Young lady, what are you doing?
Catalina: Crap
Catalina: Could you punish a face like this? :D
Away from the porcelain throne! Away! We shall not repeat this incident.
So, yes. I managed to find time to squeeze in one more update before the new year for me. Unless it's already January 1 where you are, in which case, Happy New Year! May 2013 bring us all good things!