planless
so being a female and being hispanic has managed to get me pretty far in life. it also helps that im decently intelligent too, but not exceptionally. ive been able to get most things i try for based on these things... high school, college, internships. but alas, it seems as though my good fortune has run out. im going into the real world now and i cant expect my gender, ethnicity, and mediocrity to lead me to a successful life.
in other words, i didnt get the position with NOAA, i thought it would be easy, i took it for granted, and i didnt really have a back up plan. now im the number 9 alternate for the training, but when a class size is only about 15 people, what are the chances 9 of them drop out?
and now i have no plan, its the first time in a long time i havent had an idea of what i see my future being. im afraid im going to end up in some dead end job so far removed from ocean ill shrivel to a prune. i started looking at other jobs, but when everything in science requires 3 years experience and i cant get experience without a job i feel a vicious cycle that will end with me doing nothing.
so im a little upset about this obviously, and what i hate most is that ive talked about it so much to people and hoped for it so hard that now ill have to hear everyone be sorry for me. thats not how i deal with things, i deal by forgetting as soon as possible. a condolence to me is just like pouring salt on a wound, and im not looking forward to it.
in other words, i didnt get the position with NOAA, i thought it would be easy, i took it for granted, and i didnt really have a back up plan. now im the number 9 alternate for the training, but when a class size is only about 15 people, what are the chances 9 of them drop out?
and now i have no plan, its the first time in a long time i havent had an idea of what i see my future being. im afraid im going to end up in some dead end job so far removed from ocean ill shrivel to a prune. i started looking at other jobs, but when everything in science requires 3 years experience and i cant get experience without a job i feel a vicious cycle that will end with me doing nothing.
so im a little upset about this obviously, and what i hate most is that ive talked about it so much to people and hoped for it so hard that now ill have to hear everyone be sorry for me. thats not how i deal with things, i deal by forgetting as soon as possible. a condolence to me is just like pouring salt on a wound, and im not looking forward to it.