Kevin Visit
C: i'm sorry i kept pushing you to feel your heart.
K: lol its ok babe i don't mind
C: i love you
K: i love you too
C: God it sucks to see you leave. I'm proud of you.
K: Yea i know. Thank you : )
C: No Problem : ) i'm always here
K: : ) HOOAH! Go army! lol.
C: Dork! lol.
K: lol
C: I'd never hold you back kev. I'm glad your happy.
K: The only thing i'm happy about is the army. Otherwise i'm miserable.
C: Why?
K: I dunno just am.
C: I hope things improve for you.
K: I doubt they will but the army makes me happy so i'll stick with it till the end.
C: I'm glad
K: Me too. I haven't been this happy about something i'm doing in a while and it change my life.
C: I know i heard. Hence why i'm proud of you. I appreciate you coming to see me. I'm sorry i left mom with toni.
K: I had a good time its ok she doesn't mind.
C: I'm pleased to know that. I figured my mom would annoy her. : P
K: lol
C: I know you didn't mind and not saying i regret my actions, but i did salt a wound. Your always amazing, and the untamable, but definitely someone i wish i kept and stayed loyal to...like a dog. Arf! lol.
K: Shit happens. I wish i wasn't so cold hearted and knew what shit we had felt like again. But i feel shit holding my heart down and shit.
C: I know and i understand. I'm that way with others but as always ith you it snaps back like relapse to a drug. I can go for so long blocking it out, ya know. No matter what you do or have done i forget it and just trigger how things were.
K: Yea i wish i could do that. I'm just cold and that's why i want to stay away from people so i can't hurt anyone
C: I feel weird and obsessive when it happens. I don't like it, but its a crazed love i guess.
K: I guess. I hate myself for being so dumb and shit but nothing i can do now.
C: i know that much. i'm happy and suprised you even came and saw me.
C: Dumb? about?
K: Lol even though i'm all crazy i still care.
C: Your not crazy. Your just mentally prepped and guarded for whats to come in life.
K: I guess so
C: Dumb about?
K: Just pushin you away and shit
C: When?
K: Back in the day. Probably didn't notice but i started to collapse mentally about things.
C: i mean...you do what you think is best. I don't blame you. Just like any selfish love i wish i had enough control to keep you.
K: Yea
C: No i didn't. Lord knows i did. Lol. Can't be tough around you. Lol.
C: What was goin through your head? I was trying to etch you in memories and flashin back.
K: Just random memories
C: Oh.
C: Mind if i ask which ones?
K: Lol i don't remember.
C: Nice.
K: i would if i was with you because we begin to think about it. I just can't think specific ones.
C: I understand
C: I'm very appreciative to have you as a part of my life regardless of the past. When you feel and realize things regardless if i'm involved i'm here.
K: <3
C: <3