Cutter [original]

[silver_pants]

Title: Cutter
Disclaimer: I own this piece of work
Rating: 16+
Warnings: abuse, cutting, rape, the effects of all three, swearing... not for the weak of heart or stomach or the cowardly of morals
Awards: Second Place in As Deep As It Gets
Top Spot for Creativity in the Rant and Vent Contest
4th place - Nice read, I'll definitely read it again. in

Comments

[ditch_gospel]

It is freaky. Had I known, when I started, that the wrists are a sucky place to cut, maybe I could have avoided nerve damage. It remains to be seen whether I've learned from my errors or not, as I haven't picked up a blade in just about a year now.

My first time cutting, I was living alone, so parents and friends didnt really come into the picture. I didn't even know at the time that there was a name for what I was doing, or how common it is. I happened to stumble upon reference to it when I was just casually flipping through a book on tattoos and body alteration. It was a very enlightening moment! I discovered that I wasn't a sick freak.

Anyway, if I felt that way about myself, because I was uninformed, then it really is understandable that people who don't cut are going to respond in a negative way towards us.

I remember reading an article or discussion somewhere online, debating the idea of hospitals or clinics providing free, sterile blades and information pamphlets to cutters, no questions asked.

You said your first time cutting was out of curiosity. Do you think that if, for example, the subject was routinely brought up in school health classes or something, that that would help the situation? Or would it be making more kids fall victim to curiosity? Or is it just not that big of a problem?

[illianaka]

I'm surprised it's not brought up in any health classes unless some sort of death or tragic event happens at the very school.

I had never heard of it until the friend I encountered. When she told me she dealt with stress that way, I didn't find it sick--weird, maybe, but not sick. As a writer, my natural curiosity got the better of me, and I cut my thumb. The result was an adrenaline rush I hadn't expected, intense shaking, and when it was over, a strange sense of calm exhaustion.

If it was brought up--not condescendingly--in health classes, I think there would be far more prevention. If people were taught how to deal with such a delicate situation at an early age, there would be less accusations and more help.

To compare, teaching safe sex methods prevents far more young pregnancies than preaching abstinence. You can't say, "Only one method works." You have to say, "This is the deal. Here are a few ways to deal with it without causing more harm."

[ditch_gospel]

I agree with you about the safe-sex comparison.

And oh god, yeah, the rush. Maybe a lot of people also just don't realize just how... almost addictive it can be, you know?

[illianaka]

The rush alone almost makes it worth it. I don't think most people realize how close it is to, say, a roller-coaster ride or doing a stunt off a building. And like a drug, you have to do more when the rush fades out. The cut on the thumb became cuts in the thighs to gouges in my arms, drawing more blood each time because invariably I was seeking that feeling. The calm is hard to come by until the rush has filled you.