As Predicted, Didn't Get the Job
I knew I probably blew it when I couldn't focus that evening. Unfortunately, after commuting and working all day my brain has been chowder. Well, anxiety has doubtless had a lot to do with that. Anyway. still having financial trouble--Big Ass American Bank won't even guesstimate whether they can help me lower my credit card repayment since I have no rent to include until I'm already renting and I don't have an exact net amount I'll be paid each month. With the raised interest percentages, it looks as if I'll have to pay $300 per month in credit card bills to even touch the principal. If I ever get financially ahead again, I will have Big Ass American Bank kiss my ass on my way out the door to join a credit union.
Still waking up anxious. Still feeling shaking during the day. Sometimes still waking up anxious in the middle of the night. WAY too sensitive to noise...keep wanting to throw a large rock through my sister's television (she keeps it turned up REALLY loudly but claims she hears just fine). Sigh. I technically have benefits but can't afford meds, assuming anti-anxiety drugs cost about the same as antidepressants. My deductible for insurance is a whopping $1000. Christ on an ill-fitting crutch.
At least I have a job that will pay me sometime and, thanks to being paid a bit for the total loss of my car, I can get myself caught up with bills. Whether I can stay caught up is less certain, but it's something.
Gas prices continue to rise. I'm looking at paying more in gas than I can afford to pay in rent...if I can actually afford to pay rent in May.
I'm not a fan of 2013 so far. Not at all.
My sister made the old comment about wishing life were a bowl of cherries. As far as I can tell, life is mostly like the bottom of a latrine. Sometimes you dig yourself out, but then the shit starts falling again.
Not in a cheerful mood lately. Life is definitely shitting on me and most of the people I know.
Still waking up anxious. Still feeling shaking during the day. Sometimes still waking up anxious in the middle of the night. WAY too sensitive to noise...keep wanting to throw a large rock through my sister's television (she keeps it turned up REALLY loudly but claims she hears just fine). Sigh. I technically have benefits but can't afford meds, assuming anti-anxiety drugs cost about the same as antidepressants. My deductible for insurance is a whopping $1000. Christ on an ill-fitting crutch.
At least I have a job that will pay me sometime and, thanks to being paid a bit for the total loss of my car, I can get myself caught up with bills. Whether I can stay caught up is less certain, but it's something.
Gas prices continue to rise. I'm looking at paying more in gas than I can afford to pay in rent...if I can actually afford to pay rent in May.
I'm not a fan of 2013 so far. Not at all.
My sister made the old comment about wishing life were a bowl of cherries. As far as I can tell, life is mostly like the bottom of a latrine. Sometimes you dig yourself out, but then the shit starts falling again.
Not in a cheerful mood lately. Life is definitely shitting on me and most of the people I know.