About the other night...
Me and Sara decide we're going to go to the bar together since my plans for friday night got cancelled/confused. Whatever. We go, and on the short walk over I decide I'm going to get retarded. Cause I wanted to. And because I was dressed up in my new amazing brown dress shoes and tie and not new leather jacket that happens to match the shoes amazingly. So there's some drinking and some dancing and some shots and some dancing and some drinking and some shots. We pay and get kicked out at 1 with the rest of the drunk patronage.
I run into the hippy girl from the package store that I met another time at Sports Bar and start talking to her and her friend outside the bar while Sara and JonMarc flirt. Jon Marc says he's going to walk Sara back to RVA and the people I'm talking to ask me to come hang out with them, and I drunkenly think that's a good idea so I say yes.
We go to hippy girl's apartment for a little while and drink some water and then decide to go to the new all night diner. This is where shit gets interesting.
We walk to the diner which is like a five minute walk from everywhere and we're sitting trying to decide what to order/ trying to get the room to stop spinning enough to read the menu. A woman comes over and sits in our booth, introduces herself to my two friends and then points at me. "You, you're the one I came over to talk to." Uh oh. What could crazy fake tanned 40 year old drug addled lady want? "You are gorgeous. I mean it. Seriously. You could be a model."
"Ummm, thanks." says I.
"You know, I'm serious. I'm not just trying to blow smoke up your ass. I mean I could if you want me to."
Nervous laughter from me. Thinking, please make the scary lady go away. Scary lady does leave and we eat our food and drink water in excess hoping to ward off a hang over the next day. Then as we're waiting for the check we get the second visit from scary lady.
"You are so gorgeous. Gorgeous and gay. I talked to those girls over there," points to my residents who I said hi to when I arrived, "and they said they knew you and I asked them if you were gay and they said you were."
"Well, I am."
"That's a shame. That's my boyfriend over there. He's okay looking. I'm going to pretend your head is on his body tonight."
"Ummm, I don't really know how to respond to that." I say.
"You should come visit me. I work at Ultraviolet. I know you're not into that kind of stuff but I give massages for five dollars." Exit scary lady who says goodbye to the whole diner as she leaves.
And this my friends, is why we needed a gentlemen's club in willi....so we can have hilarious stories to tell about 40 year old gross strippers.
I run into the hippy girl from the package store that I met another time at Sports Bar and start talking to her and her friend outside the bar while Sara and JonMarc flirt. Jon Marc says he's going to walk Sara back to RVA and the people I'm talking to ask me to come hang out with them, and I drunkenly think that's a good idea so I say yes.
We go to hippy girl's apartment for a little while and drink some water and then decide to go to the new all night diner. This is where shit gets interesting.
We walk to the diner which is like a five minute walk from everywhere and we're sitting trying to decide what to order/ trying to get the room to stop spinning enough to read the menu. A woman comes over and sits in our booth, introduces herself to my two friends and then points at me. "You, you're the one I came over to talk to." Uh oh. What could crazy fake tanned 40 year old drug addled lady want? "You are gorgeous. I mean it. Seriously. You could be a model."
"Ummm, thanks." says I.
"You know, I'm serious. I'm not just trying to blow smoke up your ass. I mean I could if you want me to."
Nervous laughter from me. Thinking, please make the scary lady go away. Scary lady does leave and we eat our food and drink water in excess hoping to ward off a hang over the next day. Then as we're waiting for the check we get the second visit from scary lady.
"You are so gorgeous. Gorgeous and gay. I talked to those girls over there," points to my residents who I said hi to when I arrived, "and they said they knew you and I asked them if you were gay and they said you were."
"Well, I am."
"That's a shame. That's my boyfriend over there. He's okay looking. I'm going to pretend your head is on his body tonight."
"Ummm, I don't really know how to respond to that." I say.
"You should come visit me. I work at Ultraviolet. I know you're not into that kind of stuff but I give massages for five dollars." Exit scary lady who says goodbye to the whole diner as she leaves.
And this my friends, is why we needed a gentlemen's club in willi....so we can have hilarious stories to tell about 40 year old gross strippers.