The Quintessential College Student
Stress. I wonder if it hinders or acts as a motivator. It seems strange, but sometimes I feel like we almost welcome stress, rather than simply recognizing it and getting worked up over it. That way, when we overcome it, it's that much more of a relief. It's that much more of a breath of fresh air.
It's my third year of college.More often than not I find myself wondering, "What the hell have I actually learned?" It seemed to me that all college teaches you is that you don't really have to work hard. You study smarter, not harder. But since my freshman year, I've learned this may not be entirely true. I think I've learned something new almost every day. Not just about your major or other academic shit. You learn who you are. You are forced to grow up and grow out of old habits. You become someone almost entirely new. College can rip you into pieces and make you feel like you know absolutely nothing. But with this, it also teaches you to pick yourself up, shake it off, and get the job done. So in a way, yes, college tells you how to get shit done effectively, more or less. More importantly, however, it makes you realize that you really can do what you put your mind to, even if you're half-assing it.
I remember hearing my Calc 1 TA telling us all about upper level math courses, and even showing us some of what he was doing. I specifically remember thinking, "Holy hell, I didn't sign up for that. There is NO way I can do that, I'm fucked." So there began my mathematical journey, as I like to call it. God knows I need some humor with this major. My mindset was just to take each class one step at a time: test by test, quiz by quiz. The entire time I was still thinking I was screwed. Yet when each one was over, it didn't seem as daunting as I had remembered. Now here it is almost 2 years later and I'm almost finished with a Bachelor of Science in Mathematics. Crazy as shit. On top of that, I'm done with the idea of teaching; I tried it, definitely not for me. Consequently, I added a minor in Actuarial Science. I think being an actuary is more fitting; I can actually use the math I'm learning now, and that is a big plus. Now if that wasn't enough, I decided to add another major. Statistics. So long story short, I'll be graduating on time, with a BS in math, a BS in stat, and a minor in actuarial science.
Just for shits and giggles, let's bring it back full circle.
Stress.
Hindrance or motivator? For me, motivator. To this day I still think, "there's no way I can do this," or "this class is going to be impossible." Thinking this leads to so much stress. But yet here I am, still going. When each class is over, I realize I accomplished more than I ever thought I could. All that stress pushed me through the end, and when I was finished it was beyond a relief.
So bring it on, last 4 semesters. I'm not scared.
(Maybe only a little.)