When times get hard and shit hits the fan...
OK, so I was almost right last night. I called Russell and woke him up and he was like "I didn't promise anything and besides there's nothing to do." I was sooooo pissed off. Then, he called me back an hour later and told me he wanted me to come spend the night with him. So, that I did. We watched a few movies, "chilled", went to sleep. Got up today, Donald and his girlfriend were there. They got in a fight before they left. After they left, me and Russell got in a fight. (Can't we all just get along?! Well, hell no.) So, I attempted to break up with Russell. But, once I got home and talked to him, I realized I just couldn't. I'm wayyyy too attached. He didn't beg me not to or anything like that. All he said was "whatever you want." Then, I was like "you tell me you love me one minute and the next you say you don't care anymore." He said, "I do love you, I don't care when it comes to the games, we both play mind games too much." This is very true. I've never been this attached to any guy. This scares me. I don't want him to find out how attached I am, then he'll know how much control he really does have over me. Enough about me and Russell. (for this entry, anyway) Now, Clinton. So, he calls tonight. (earlier today my mom was all "find out if he's ok, or we're filling a missing person's report tomorrow") *ahem* So, yeah, he calls tonight. I go in my mom's room to tell her the message he left on callwave. She says "I don't care!" and bitches at me because she was asleep. Comes in the kitchen, acting like she was gonna throw some fists at me. What a bitch. She's the one that told me to find out if he was ok. I'm not telling any of them when, or what, I hear from him again. Makes me wanna go to Boston myself. It's like every family member I have likes me more than my own mother. Grrr! Not much I can do about it though. I'm out. Holla Balla!
"Don't Laugh At Me" - Mark Wills
I'm a little boy with glasses
The one they call the geek
A little girl who never smiles
'Cause I've got braces on my teeth
And I know how it feels
To cry myself to sleep
I'm that kid on every playground
Who's always chosen last
A single teenage mother
Tryin' to overcome my past
You don't have to be my friend
But is it too much to ask
Don't laugh at me
Don't call me names
Don't get your pleasure from my pain
In God's eyes we're all the same
Someday we'll all have perfect wings
Don't laugh at me
I'm the cripple on the corner
You've passed me on the street
And I wouldn't be out here beggin'
If I had enough to eat
And don't think I don't notice
That our eyes never meet
I lost my wife and little boy when
Someone cross that yellow line
The day we laid them in the ground
Is the day I lost my mind
And right now I'm down to holdin'
This little cardboard sign...so
Don't laugh at me
Don't call me names
Don't get your pleasure from my pain
In God's eyes we're all the same
Someday we'll all have perfect wings
Don't laugh at me
I'm fat, I'm thin, I'm short, I'm tall
I'm deaf, I'm blind, hey, aren't we all
Don't laugh at me
Don't call me names
Don't get your pleasure from my pain
In God's eyes we're all the same
Someday we'll all have perfect wings
Don't laugh at me
-Brit-
I LOVE Russell <3