It's over...
I reckon this'll be my last LJ entry... I was rather relunctant to start one, because the one time I had kept a journal of any sort, it became much too painful to read the entries, especially when they were meant to be read WITH someone else.
The girlfriend and I had another spat tonight. It was rediculous. She was oversensitive, and I probably overreacted. I wanted to resolve the problem, but she denied that there was one and proceeded to log off instead of talking it through.
If this was an isolated incident, I'd fret about it, apologize the next day and do something to make it up to her. But, I feel this is a systemic problem. Perhaps it's just that we're too different... an issue of compatibility. I've been steadily losing faith in our relationship ever since it began. I felt she was much more open and genuinely interested when we were "just friends".
Though we haven't officially broken up yet, in my heart, the love I had for my girlfriend has been lost. I've done more, to express my love and interest,in this girl than all my other love interests in the past. And yet, it rarely seemed to register much. I haven't felt loved and, in fact, felt more miserable than happy in this relationship. Young love surely should not feel this way.
I'm not gonna initiate any conversation with her. I'll leave it up to her for once. Hopefully we can make the split amicable. I guess part of the reason I've held on for so long was that I didn't want to lose the time and effort I had invested... for when we love, we love not only that which is, but that which may be as well.
Farewell.
The girlfriend and I had another spat tonight. It was rediculous. She was oversensitive, and I probably overreacted. I wanted to resolve the problem, but she denied that there was one and proceeded to log off instead of talking it through.
If this was an isolated incident, I'd fret about it, apologize the next day and do something to make it up to her. But, I feel this is a systemic problem. Perhaps it's just that we're too different... an issue of compatibility. I've been steadily losing faith in our relationship ever since it began. I felt she was much more open and genuinely interested when we were "just friends".
Though we haven't officially broken up yet, in my heart, the love I had for my girlfriend has been lost. I've done more, to express my love and interest,in this girl than all my other love interests in the past. And yet, it rarely seemed to register much. I haven't felt loved and, in fact, felt more miserable than happy in this relationship. Young love surely should not feel this way.
I'm not gonna initiate any conversation with her. I'll leave it up to her for once. Hopefully we can make the split amicable. I guess part of the reason I've held on for so long was that I didn't want to lose the time and effort I had invested... for when we love, we love not only that which is, but that which may be as well.
Farewell.