Wild and Crazy Kids
Well. To say the least the past few days have been a mindfuck. I was just reading the archives of this journal, back to when I first started it in December of 2003. At that time in my life I was reeling from a failed first semester at Syracuse, missing home, friends, and of course Rebecca. Back then I hated Syracuse with such a passion, not because of what it was but because of WHERE it was. And that's the thing that's been haunting me for some time now, only to be exorcized in a drunken rage this weekend.
Yes, I miss my friends at Syracuse. That I knew.
But I also miss SU, the campus, the snow, the quiet, the formerly Orangemen....
And I don't have much to say about BU. Except that it is a fabulous school that was there for me when I so desperately needed it. But it was never home.
And with all of this I realize that I have a way out, an avenue that would lead me back to Syracuse and the place where, however miserable it seemed, I was at home. And it chokes in my throat when I realize how badly I want to graduate from Syracuse, how badly I will miss my friends at BU if I leave here, how badly I will miss rebecca.
I was hoping it was all nostalgia until this weekend. But I really feel at home there, as weird as that is for an admittedly obnoxious masshole such as myself. I never could convince myself that I was a terrier, I guess.
I was going to keep this quiet, but I'm too confused and honestly I need people to talk to about it, to help get my head on straight. Thanks for reading.
joe
Yes, I miss my friends at Syracuse. That I knew.
But I also miss SU, the campus, the snow, the quiet, the formerly Orangemen....
And I don't have much to say about BU. Except that it is a fabulous school that was there for me when I so desperately needed it. But it was never home.
And with all of this I realize that I have a way out, an avenue that would lead me back to Syracuse and the place where, however miserable it seemed, I was at home. And it chokes in my throat when I realize how badly I want to graduate from Syracuse, how badly I will miss my friends at BU if I leave here, how badly I will miss rebecca.
I was hoping it was all nostalgia until this weekend. But I really feel at home there, as weird as that is for an admittedly obnoxious masshole such as myself. I never could convince myself that I was a terrier, I guess.
I was going to keep this quiet, but I'm too confused and honestly I need people to talk to about it, to help get my head on straight. Thanks for reading.
joe