Human Interaction Modeling through Electrical Engineering
So here we have it. A year later, and I'm maybe, just maybe, back alive enough to update this thing more regularly.
Today's topic: the relevance of various fields of academia to human interactions. Scientific fields through the lens of pop sociology, you might say. A topic that's fascinated me of late, as I've thought up models that describe various ways that people affect one another and how they might be applied to other fields of inquiry, and as such, possibly where those models are already well-described and could just be nabbed and applied, basically. So like earlier today, I was pondering how various things that we've been taught about How to do Relationships affects our outcomes -- for example, I have trouble with a lot of guys around here of the more "California Stud" type, because they're used to just playing super-smooth and it only lasting for a bit. I fall for Smooth and consequently brand myself as Awkward and Stumbly because I don't feel like I match up to them, fall behind on that measurement. So I try to hasten my steps there, my smoothness of operation there, and thus instead find myself instead driving away guys that actually want the slower (yes, this is all written for the straight orientation because again, this is what I've been taught, so that's how my models make the most sense at the moment. When thinking beyond those, it's a matter of expansion; the expanded version is not what immediately comes to mind... lack of training in further systems makes those come less naturally to me, no matter how much I intellectually reach out for them). It's kind of ironic, I guess? I'm never quite sure whether I'm using that word properly or not after English class in high school, sheesh.
Anyway, yea, so in mulling these over, I then stumble over an xkcd comic referencing Karnaugh maps, and am like, "hey this sounds like an interesting mathematical concept," so I search up some information on it, discover that it's actually an electrical engineering concept, and that hey, what are these things called race conditions? And then reading up on race conditions and finding out that they actually make a lot of sense with regards to relationships... things like whether you have sex on the first or fourth hookup does end up mattering, and if you call "sex" one program and "hook up" one program, you want to make sure hookup loops the right number of times before sex starts running. Because if the distinction in start times for you is too different than the distinction in start times for your partner, that's going to throw the whole interaction off.
And such might apply to friendships, too. If you call somebody on the phone and you've known them for months, for some people it doesn't matter whether you got their number off facebook or if they'd given it to you at an earlier point. But for some people, such might actually be a fairly important indicator of how well they think they know you. It's the little "oh, let's hang out this weekend," as distinct from "let's hang out this weekend, here's my number" that matters. The former could either mean a vague 'if we run into each other,' or it could mean a reliance on the facebook network (or other school directory-type networks and such) that must carefully be navigated and trusted. If you're accepted to be within some sort of network (your husband knows my number, get it from him) that contains the number, then it's an acknowledgement of that already-existing bond. Giving the number is something of an acknowledgement that there is no preexisting connection, bond, but an openness to begin sharing information, identity, network position. Making the former, shorter statement means that which interpretation is meant is thought to be clear to the one making the statement. However, the fact that such a statement actually does have possible interpretations is a subject of many misunderstandings in the drama of human-human communication.
It becomes creepy if someone's a bit more forward and looks up your number if you hadn't understood it as something already given. But it's something of a rejection if you don't look up the number, and it was a person who did expect to put some effort into meeting. Of course, that means that that person could call you if they don't get a call, put in their own effort, right? But sometimes the person is shy enough that even just making that shorter statement was something of an effort. They interpret it as a full step. And so then also calling that weekend makes them think they are being over-forward, pushy even. That's generally where I falter. I am overafraid of being thought of as pushy, demanding. But so if the other person makes a gesture like, "yea, what should we do? Friday afternoon?" or something right there so the field isn't left open, there isn't a need to worry about phone numbers or additional points requiring initiating of communications, is often what kicks things forward here with minimal fretting. But that's also somewhat unfair, because it leaves no time for thought of what is desired at the future meeting. (Do you actually want coffee, or do you just want to hang out at a group gathering that was already going to be occurring, they're cool, just introduce more people to one another, see how your friends get along, how that might help you get to know them better?)
I think I'm going to stop now. This is getting kind of ridiculous.
Today's topic: the relevance of various fields of academia to human interactions. Scientific fields through the lens of pop sociology, you might say. A topic that's fascinated me of late, as I've thought up models that describe various ways that people affect one another and how they might be applied to other fields of inquiry, and as such, possibly where those models are already well-described and could just be nabbed and applied, basically. So like earlier today, I was pondering how various things that we've been taught about How to do Relationships affects our outcomes -- for example, I have trouble with a lot of guys around here of the more "California Stud" type, because they're used to just playing super-smooth and it only lasting for a bit. I fall for Smooth and consequently brand myself as Awkward and Stumbly because I don't feel like I match up to them, fall behind on that measurement. So I try to hasten my steps there, my smoothness of operation there, and thus instead find myself instead driving away guys that actually want the slower (yes, this is all written for the straight orientation because again, this is what I've been taught, so that's how my models make the most sense at the moment. When thinking beyond those, it's a matter of expansion; the expanded version is not what immediately comes to mind... lack of training in further systems makes those come less naturally to me, no matter how much I intellectually reach out for them). It's kind of ironic, I guess? I'm never quite sure whether I'm using that word properly or not after English class in high school, sheesh.
Anyway, yea, so in mulling these over, I then stumble over an xkcd comic referencing Karnaugh maps, and am like, "hey this sounds like an interesting mathematical concept," so I search up some information on it, discover that it's actually an electrical engineering concept, and that hey, what are these things called race conditions? And then reading up on race conditions and finding out that they actually make a lot of sense with regards to relationships... things like whether you have sex on the first or fourth hookup does end up mattering, and if you call "sex" one program and "hook up" one program, you want to make sure hookup loops the right number of times before sex starts running. Because if the distinction in start times for you is too different than the distinction in start times for your partner, that's going to throw the whole interaction off.
And such might apply to friendships, too. If you call somebody on the phone and you've known them for months, for some people it doesn't matter whether you got their number off facebook or if they'd given it to you at an earlier point. But for some people, such might actually be a fairly important indicator of how well they think they know you. It's the little "oh, let's hang out this weekend," as distinct from "let's hang out this weekend, here's my number" that matters. The former could either mean a vague 'if we run into each other,' or it could mean a reliance on the facebook network (or other school directory-type networks and such) that must carefully be navigated and trusted. If you're accepted to be within some sort of network (your husband knows my number, get it from him) that contains the number, then it's an acknowledgement of that already-existing bond. Giving the number is something of an acknowledgement that there is no preexisting connection, bond, but an openness to begin sharing information, identity, network position. Making the former, shorter statement means that which interpretation is meant is thought to be clear to the one making the statement. However, the fact that such a statement actually does have possible interpretations is a subject of many misunderstandings in the drama of human-human communication.
It becomes creepy if someone's a bit more forward and looks up your number if you hadn't understood it as something already given. But it's something of a rejection if you don't look up the number, and it was a person who did expect to put some effort into meeting. Of course, that means that that person could call you if they don't get a call, put in their own effort, right? But sometimes the person is shy enough that even just making that shorter statement was something of an effort. They interpret it as a full step. And so then also calling that weekend makes them think they are being over-forward, pushy even. That's generally where I falter. I am overafraid of being thought of as pushy, demanding. But so if the other person makes a gesture like, "yea, what should we do? Friday afternoon?" or something right there so the field isn't left open, there isn't a need to worry about phone numbers or additional points requiring initiating of communications, is often what kicks things forward here with minimal fretting. But that's also somewhat unfair, because it leaves no time for thought of what is desired at the future meeting. (Do you actually want coffee, or do you just want to hang out at a group gathering that was already going to be occurring, they're cool, just introduce more people to one another, see how your friends get along, how that might help you get to know them better?)
I think I'm going to stop now. This is getting kind of ridiculous.