(no subject)
I really HAVE been good at faking it lately. I just wanted to take the time to acknowledge that I am not, in fact, happy and go-lucky as my countenance may suggest.
Someone recently complained about my Facebook photo, stating that it didn't look like me. "You're usually smiling." As this was someone who sees me on a regular basis in all kinds of moods, I was taken aback.
A co-worker and I were discussing the #1 asset to our jobs. "The ability to smile like I'm saying "cheese" all while being bitched at or telling someone off." Yes. And then we both go home and partake of scotch or whisky, respectively, and smile some more.
At night I fall onto my bed face down and stare at the speck of whatever that's milimeters from my eye. I can spend anywhere from 5 minutes to 2 hours like this, and then I go to sleep. My mind just keeps running in circles.
I've been contemplating finding god, lately. That seems to help a lot of people straighten out their lives and become decently happy human beings. But I think I've tried that before, to no outstanding results.
I guess it's all those little gems that make me smile. And a sick sense of humor. I save my sadness for when I'm alone.
Someone recently complained about my Facebook photo, stating that it didn't look like me. "You're usually smiling." As this was someone who sees me on a regular basis in all kinds of moods, I was taken aback.
A co-worker and I were discussing the #1 asset to our jobs. "The ability to smile like I'm saying "cheese" all while being bitched at or telling someone off." Yes. And then we both go home and partake of scotch or whisky, respectively, and smile some more.
At night I fall onto my bed face down and stare at the speck of whatever that's milimeters from my eye. I can spend anywhere from 5 minutes to 2 hours like this, and then I go to sleep. My mind just keeps running in circles.
I've been contemplating finding god, lately. That seems to help a lot of people straighten out their lives and become decently happy human beings. But I think I've tried that before, to no outstanding results.
I guess it's all those little gems that make me smile. And a sick sense of humor. I save my sadness for when I'm alone.