A very surreal evening....
So, this last weekend was mixed bag, of sorts....
Friday, not much had happened outside of the usual drinking and whatnot....Ended up meeting the guys at the Yardarm at about 11:30pm (Good ol' Molten Core), on a severely empty stomach. Drank the drink o' champeens, the Jaegerbomb, and then we ended up hanging over at Nate and Kevin's house til 3:30am or so....A typical friday night, really...
Saturday, I went and picked up Jesse from the airport. Fred came along, and we then headed down to Yardarm....No one really knew Jesse was coming home, and everyone else wigged out, in one form or another...It was great having Jesse around, I had really missed that guy. Michelle came and hung out, and it was also awesome seeing her. Incidentally, Brandy, my really good friend from Tri-Cities, was in town for a concert, and she came and hung out also. It was awesome to see both her and Michelle....I really had missed Brandy. I had left my digital camera/mp3 player chargers over there back in May, and she brought those. Goooood times, I missed those devices. Not as much as I had missed all my friends, though.
So by closing time, we decide to go get some Denny's. We ended up being loud as hell, and most likely a bit obnoxious...Heh, at 2:30am, I don't think I cared much, to be honest. Well, at dinner, it had slipped out of this girl who was hanging out that my ex girlfriend, Jessica, was/is pregnant. Five months pregnant. At first, I laughed....Then I gave it some thought, and for some reason I still can't identify, it bugs me. Like, I'm not sure if it's annoyance, or sadness, or what, but I definitely feel negative about the situation. Actually, nix that. I know it saddens me, as she was the last girl I've said I love you to (which was, in all fairness, when i was 19, so 6 years this summer), and we were engaged until I broke things off. Yes, I did make my own bed, and yes, if I cared, I should have gotten back with her, but, I dunno. I couldn't really grow as an individual in that relationship. Also, she was hanging out a lot with another guy, (to ultimately get me to be jealous or care more, I guess...Bad idea) who I knew was trying to get with her, and she wouldn't stop doing that. So basically, I did the right thing. This still doesn't change the fact that it still makes me sad, for some completely ego-related or petty reason.
One thing that does genuinely piss me off about the situation is that the father of the kid is the same guy who kept interfering in our relationship that Jessica and I had, so go figure. I think one reason I'm not really happy with the situation, is that she has pulled some shady shit on him and was always speaking ill of the guy. It just shows she was lying to me, or not being honest with herself. Oh well, I guess she is fully and entirely out of my life now, and that's a good thing, as now, I'm a much different and happier person. Yet my head still wanders to the Jessica I knew, and the person I was then. Sure, we change and (ideally) become better people, but trips down memory lane sure can send your mind reeling. Fucking hell, I hate exes.
Between that and being full of regret for the way I've handled things with Brandy (another long story), and some other odds and ends, I kinda am in the anti-girl mindset. Lately, I think I've been leaning towards telling the opposite sex to fuck off. I feel like I don't want to spend time/money/energy chasing them, as I have no desire to put myself in a bad mindset when things aren't exactly perfect. Add to that the fact my hermit ways are creeping back in, and I'm sorta feel like I have a weight on my shoulders....Things will probably change fairly quick on the hermitism, as usually, the weekends are pretty fun. Being that Jesse is home now also, things are gonna be pretty badass, to be honest....I still feel like I want to isolate myself for a month or two sometimes though, and I'm not sure why....
I think, after I wake up, and Lindsy gets off work, I'ma go visit Taylor. She always cheers me up.
Anyways, more to come later, I suppose whenever the hell I feel like it. Oh, unless it's a Warcraft deal, Noel wants me to post pictures.
Friday, not much had happened outside of the usual drinking and whatnot....Ended up meeting the guys at the Yardarm at about 11:30pm (Good ol' Molten Core), on a severely empty stomach. Drank the drink o' champeens, the Jaegerbomb, and then we ended up hanging over at Nate and Kevin's house til 3:30am or so....A typical friday night, really...
Saturday, I went and picked up Jesse from the airport. Fred came along, and we then headed down to Yardarm....No one really knew Jesse was coming home, and everyone else wigged out, in one form or another...It was great having Jesse around, I had really missed that guy. Michelle came and hung out, and it was also awesome seeing her. Incidentally, Brandy, my really good friend from Tri-Cities, was in town for a concert, and she came and hung out also. It was awesome to see both her and Michelle....I really had missed Brandy. I had left my digital camera/mp3 player chargers over there back in May, and she brought those. Goooood times, I missed those devices. Not as much as I had missed all my friends, though.
So by closing time, we decide to go get some Denny's. We ended up being loud as hell, and most likely a bit obnoxious...Heh, at 2:30am, I don't think I cared much, to be honest. Well, at dinner, it had slipped out of this girl who was hanging out that my ex girlfriend, Jessica, was/is pregnant. Five months pregnant. At first, I laughed....Then I gave it some thought, and for some reason I still can't identify, it bugs me. Like, I'm not sure if it's annoyance, or sadness, or what, but I definitely feel negative about the situation. Actually, nix that. I know it saddens me, as she was the last girl I've said I love you to (which was, in all fairness, when i was 19, so 6 years this summer), and we were engaged until I broke things off. Yes, I did make my own bed, and yes, if I cared, I should have gotten back with her, but, I dunno. I couldn't really grow as an individual in that relationship. Also, she was hanging out a lot with another guy, (to ultimately get me to be jealous or care more, I guess...Bad idea) who I knew was trying to get with her, and she wouldn't stop doing that. So basically, I did the right thing. This still doesn't change the fact that it still makes me sad, for some completely ego-related or petty reason.
One thing that does genuinely piss me off about the situation is that the father of the kid is the same guy who kept interfering in our relationship that Jessica and I had, so go figure. I think one reason I'm not really happy with the situation, is that she has pulled some shady shit on him and was always speaking ill of the guy. It just shows she was lying to me, or not being honest with herself. Oh well, I guess she is fully and entirely out of my life now, and that's a good thing, as now, I'm a much different and happier person. Yet my head still wanders to the Jessica I knew, and the person I was then. Sure, we change and (ideally) become better people, but trips down memory lane sure can send your mind reeling. Fucking hell, I hate exes.
Between that and being full of regret for the way I've handled things with Brandy (another long story), and some other odds and ends, I kinda am in the anti-girl mindset. Lately, I think I've been leaning towards telling the opposite sex to fuck off. I feel like I don't want to spend time/money/energy chasing them, as I have no desire to put myself in a bad mindset when things aren't exactly perfect. Add to that the fact my hermit ways are creeping back in, and I'm sorta feel like I have a weight on my shoulders....Things will probably change fairly quick on the hermitism, as usually, the weekends are pretty fun. Being that Jesse is home now also, things are gonna be pretty badass, to be honest....I still feel like I want to isolate myself for a month or two sometimes though, and I'm not sure why....
I think, after I wake up, and Lindsy gets off work, I'ma go visit Taylor. She always cheers me up.
Anyways, more to come later, I suppose whenever the hell I feel like it. Oh, unless it's a Warcraft deal, Noel wants me to post pictures.