(no subject)
"I have a great low carb, zero trans fat philosophy ready to propel me towards life at a new trajectory
I know now that theres nothing I can do especially when everything I say is misconstrued
Everything I do seems to be perceived as a reprise as if Im carefully calculating her demise
I'll admit a little bit of what I've done was out of spite but I have to throw at least one punch in this fight
Im not going to sit here and pretend to be a fucking saint but at the same time its not like I fantasize about using her blood as paint
Even in the blow I gave I did her a favor I opened up that gate way of honesty to allow her mother to be her savior
An eye for an eye will leave everyone blind so fuck that because I really want to see things this time
I want to drink in the ocean because it taste like my tears I want to swim out and demolish my fears
The fear that I wont have enough for the swim back that Im much to weak and that its guaranteed that I'll collapse
But I wont this time though.. I finally procured a new source of redemption that has greatly altered my perceptions
I know now that nothing in life comes easy and if it does its most likely dishonest and sleazey
Using lack of years to excuse lack of a common sense civility or using substances to relinquish accountablity.
That is not my path.. I do whats right not whats easy because to make myself I have to break myself to get through to the real me"
-Matthew A. Solari