(no subject)
Sleepless nights these days and I can't make my mind shut up. So I train. I train my body longer and harder so I can distract myself from my thoughts. A life philosophy proven right? Maybe. I hate that. My previous evening consisted of me going on and getting shit faced and right now I don't give a flying fuck.
And even though I woke up this morning with no more than 2 hours of sleep I still pushed my body more. Hmm...yeah I'm trying to burn myself out. Why lie? Fuck.
And now I have mixed feelings about some news I got earlier tonight. Someone I know is dying. He doesn't have much time left and folks are coming up to be with him at the end. And when I heard the news I felt a cold smile creep across my face. Despite his end being complicated even now at the end I think he deserved far worse. And when he's finally dead I can cut that part out.
Schadenfreude...
And even though I woke up this morning with no more than 2 hours of sleep I still pushed my body more. Hmm...yeah I'm trying to burn myself out. Why lie? Fuck.
And now I have mixed feelings about some news I got earlier tonight. Someone I know is dying. He doesn't have much time left and folks are coming up to be with him at the end. And when I heard the news I felt a cold smile creep across my face. Despite his end being complicated even now at the end I think he deserved far worse. And when he's finally dead I can cut that part out.
Schadenfreude...