May 15, 2006 11:31
exams are fucking with me. no, i take that back, its the dossiers.
3 exams, 3 dossiers, this week. live. i cant anymore. this regime of never ending typing with the window open, hearing them on holidays, and that jealousy of no being able to just lounge there below the trees like that. One week. I can do one week.
I cant figure out which one of us is playing games. We take turns perhaps. I just need to relax and stop looking for truthful answers. We live in a world of sarcasm and hidden double meanings. Everything I write and send seems to reflect those fragments of my over-and-done-with days. I do it way too much. Subconsciously.
Julia is now gone, and I'm going to flipping miss that girl. Too many fun times. The laughter, the lack of sleep, and the tears on her part. How can we get close to people when we know we will be separated by boarders sooner than later? I have done this too much already. There is a lot more to go. And it hurts.