my book...
is it wrong that i can identify with some of the personalities in my book? is it wrong that i completely understand why the woman's mind created someone to take the pain and abuse for her?
i wonder from time to time why i'm not locked up in a crazy house. i came to the conclusion that it's because i learned how to act. i learned how to hold back tears without evidencing any hurt. i learned to smile when appropriate even if it wasn't funny or i foun it completely repulsive. i learned to look like i was listening without my eyes glossing over. i learned to show that something hurt even when it didn't. i learned to survive in a place where i was mentally, physically, and sexually abused.
i've known for the longest time that i have trust issues, but how can you not have trust issues when your own father took advantage of your innocence? i really fucking hate him. mother fucker.
needless to say, i have relationship issues.
i wonder from time to time why i'm not locked up in a crazy house. i came to the conclusion that it's because i learned how to act. i learned how to hold back tears without evidencing any hurt. i learned to smile when appropriate even if it wasn't funny or i foun it completely repulsive. i learned to look like i was listening without my eyes glossing over. i learned to show that something hurt even when it didn't. i learned to survive in a place where i was mentally, physically, and sexually abused.
i've known for the longest time that i have trust issues, but how can you not have trust issues when your own father took advantage of your innocence? i really fucking hate him. mother fucker.
needless to say, i have relationship issues.