Hello again
I am free finally free. She is gone they are both gone. This war inside my mind is over. but now what. the dust is clear. and there is you. You are amazing and I am in love with you. What will it be like when I am like this? Can I be free and still make you happy? I must admit I am terrified of the next month. I want you. I want this. I am just afraid. what if things don't go as planned. I wish I could tell you. or even anyone about how I really felt the past 12 years. that is how I felt. but I am becoming okay with letting the past lye. they will be back and I am fine with her now. She is gone. I let her in and now she is gone. I guess that is all I needed to do. however, why like this? I know everything will be fine. but the irony, life is so weird sometimes. even here I talk in riddles. I should just say what is on my mind. and keep myself honest, the truth behind their war and why it started. I kinda want to share all this but where would I even start this 12 year story. This is just not something people talk about. They really are a different entity than me. just because they are gone does not mean that I forget. who would I talk to who would understand?