Are you drowning your fears in a glass of deception?
04/01/05
i'm not really sure what to write about. i feel boring. i need some excitement, drama or something. everythings allright, but thats it, just allright.
hmm i kinda miss my house. i dunno i guess i'm just feeling a little homesick. i also need my girls. i'm tired of just hanging out with a bunch of boys. its kinda wierd when they start talking about girls and your the only girl. not so fresh.
wed has become our official happy hour. we've become such drunks its not even funny. i never thought i'd be drinking so much alcohol. but it just seems easier when life becomes a blurr. that funky tasting liquid can somehow magically make everything better for a while. and were not drinking alone so that makes more fun. everybody is happy. and thats the way it should be.
i feel kinda alone sometimes, but its no so bad. i've learned to deal with it and try to make the most of it. i dunno its wierd because i feel lonely, but it doesnt bother me. maybe i've just given up and lost hope. once that happens theres nothing left. its like i've become kinda numb, and that sucks. i dont like feeling numb, cuz your just there. like rubber, it bounces off. well i wanna be glue, i want it to stick to me.
i've talked to joey a few times. i wanna talk to him, but i think its mostly for comfort. who knows?
i like the baseball player, but i think thats where it will stay. i dont think i'll ever talk to him. i'm cool with that for now. i'm slowly getting back in the game, i'll be able to swing eventually.
well i'm off to class. he'll be there ;P
"Are you drowning your fears in a glass of deception? When everything is hazy then everything will be ok. When everything is hazy then you won't be sad that you stayed."