(no subject)
That universal force which I like to call God exists for the most part inside my mind. This is not to say it's fictional, just that the control center is located there in my head, in the form of life interpretations determined by my current mood. When a little thing goes wrong I get pissy and then everything else goes wrong. When a little piece of happiness shines through somewhere, I can get so stupidly appreciative and then everything else in my world gets a little brighter. It's amazing to me how I operate like this: I can change my attitude in seconds, like with a flip of a switch. Good and bad are perpetually arguing inside my head like in a play where the villain is wreaking havoc on the stage and fucking shit up and then suddenly the Hero enters stage right, takes over, upstages the other actor, and changes the whole course of events. Over and over again. I think this is what's going to happen to me on my deathbed; I'll be jaded that I didn't do everything I want, but at the last second I'm going to change my mind and take a deep breath, say "fuck it" and spread a smile across my face at all the things that made me laugh in this life so I can secure a spot in the universe's VIP lounge where all the drinks are free and the weather is always perfect.
We're supposedly made in the image of God and so I think each of us carries around a little piece of that power to change things and so we have free will to affect our own life, yet with all these little pieces of power emanating from people's heads all combining and interacting and causing and effecting, the universe regulates its events to sort these things out and make order and thus make events predictable (at least in hindsight) or seem like they were meant to happen.
I always wanted to write a beautiful story about how way back in the day God and Satan used to be lovers and how we're the children of their union, and now we're caught in the middle of two divorced and fighting parents who are using us and influencing us to get back at each other. and we love each other and hurt each other because we're just like our parents. the betrayal between them is so deep that they'll do anything to bring the other down, at the expense of their children, even if it means blowing up the fucking world and killing us all. and it would take something drastic like that to finally reconcile them and restore everyone to Paradise. wouldn't that be nice?
We're supposedly made in the image of God and so I think each of us carries around a little piece of that power to change things and so we have free will to affect our own life, yet with all these little pieces of power emanating from people's heads all combining and interacting and causing and effecting, the universe regulates its events to sort these things out and make order and thus make events predictable (at least in hindsight) or seem like they were meant to happen.
I always wanted to write a beautiful story about how way back in the day God and Satan used to be lovers and how we're the children of their union, and now we're caught in the middle of two divorced and fighting parents who are using us and influencing us to get back at each other. and we love each other and hurt each other because we're just like our parents. the betrayal between them is so deep that they'll do anything to bring the other down, at the expense of their children, even if it means blowing up the fucking world and killing us all. and it would take something drastic like that to finally reconcile them and restore everyone to Paradise. wouldn't that be nice?