(no subject)
Still trying to decide if I want a tattoo or not.
For reference, the tattoo being considered is the Agent Carter quote "I know my value" across my wrist, preferably in a typewriter style font.
Pros:
1. Awesome fandom reference that also works for my real life.
2. When I'm having days where I let others judgements of me drag me down I can look at it and remember that I DO know my value and it DOESN'T really matter what anyone else thinks.
Cons:
1. Placement would put it over a scar (flapjack related but in the stereotypical self-harm position) which might be too melodramatic?
2. Worried about ability to cover it if I regret it/want to interview for a job etc.
3. Worried about regretting it in general. I can be very faddy.
So...yeah. I don't even know. I don't really want it anywhere else, which would solve this. I want it visible, there's not much point to me of doing it if I'm not going to show it (yet one of my worries is showing it. I know). The other place, I guess, would be the top of my arm but that's not my favourite part of my body (I am overweight, my upper arms are quite big so I don't really like to show them and the design would have to be bigger).
But then part of my wants to just go for it. Thinks that the value of having it there will outweigh the anxiety of it. I know plenty of professional people with tattoos and I can always cover it with a cardigan or bracelets or a watch. And it's fandom related but broad enough that really it's not becasue of fandom I want to get it, it's becasue it means something to me outside of that. I spent so many years trying to define myself by how other people see me - 10000% done with that now. I know my value, even with a tattoo. Even with funny hair. Even if you think I'm not living up to my potential.
But anxiety.
I keep talking myself out of it and into it and out of it again. I know I really want it because, if I didn't, I'd have taken the idea off the table entirely by now. So I don't know if this is just general pre-big-decision anxiety of if it's something else.
For reference, the tattoo being considered is the Agent Carter quote "I know my value" across my wrist, preferably in a typewriter style font.
Pros:
1. Awesome fandom reference that also works for my real life.
2. When I'm having days where I let others judgements of me drag me down I can look at it and remember that I DO know my value and it DOESN'T really matter what anyone else thinks.
Cons:
1. Placement would put it over a scar (flapjack related but in the stereotypical self-harm position) which might be too melodramatic?
2. Worried about ability to cover it if I regret it/want to interview for a job etc.
3. Worried about regretting it in general. I can be very faddy.
So...yeah. I don't even know. I don't really want it anywhere else, which would solve this. I want it visible, there's not much point to me of doing it if I'm not going to show it (yet one of my worries is showing it. I know). The other place, I guess, would be the top of my arm but that's not my favourite part of my body (I am overweight, my upper arms are quite big so I don't really like to show them and the design would have to be bigger).
But then part of my wants to just go for it. Thinks that the value of having it there will outweigh the anxiety of it. I know plenty of professional people with tattoos and I can always cover it with a cardigan or bracelets or a watch. And it's fandom related but broad enough that really it's not becasue of fandom I want to get it, it's becasue it means something to me outside of that. I spent so many years trying to define myself by how other people see me - 10000% done with that now. I know my value, even with a tattoo. Even with funny hair. Even if you think I'm not living up to my potential.
But anxiety.
I keep talking myself out of it and into it and out of it again. I know I really want it because, if I didn't, I'd have taken the idea off the table entirely by now. So I don't know if this is just general pre-big-decision anxiety of if it's something else.