Peppers Mean Go
Listening to the new Red Hot Chili Peppers single. It's making me want more, to be better. Things this amazing band inspire me to do:
*Be stronger be braver be less lazy less weak to not be ruled by my fears or apathy but figure out what I want and run towards it. To actually take drum lessons this summer, may something strike me down if I don't get off my ass and do this, I will scrimp, I will save, I will share shitty housing but I'm making enough to afford drum lessons. And I will become worthy of the cheap drum set I own and I will find other people to play with and I'll join a band and make music that means something to me and gives me the feeling that the Chili Peppers, Tom Vek, Minor Threat, Godspeed You Black Enperor! give me, that there's so much more to life.
I'm not articulating this at all. I just love this band, and I love music and how it can make me feel. And I will continue my quest to have an amazing extradorinary life, and find a way to help and benefit others in the process. And I'm going to stop lounging about at my parents house in the suburbs, vacations over, and I'm going to take care of the things I need to take care of (change oil in car, fix laptop disaster, write to uncle with cancer, visit old work and finally give them invoice for services rendered long ago)and then I'm going to go to the desert for a week (hoped to be as good idea as it sounded when it first popped into my head) and then I'm moving to the bay area to start the next chapter in my life.
In more coherent less didadic news I mentioned to my father my possible desire to be a travel writer and he made the good suggestion of checking out travel magazines and see if there are any instructional books. And I'll be damned if there aren't several books entitled things like "Find Fun and Profit Through Travel Writing: A How To Guide." So I'm going to check that out and start writing and send stuff out to magazines and the like, just for practice. I figure if I'm lucky some of the rejections will include constructive criticism. Okay, that's fairly optimistic, but it will be good practice and I think tall shipping and possible the Thai cult abduction will make good stories.
Also, my perfect bay area housing fell through. So now I'm back at square one, though I am there with two friends. So now we have to find new cheap bay area housing for the three of us. I want to share a room to be frugal but this nagging voice keeps reminding me of the boy, and what of him, and what if he spends the summer with me. And then I have to sternly remind myself that he has given me no notices or promises as to his summer plans, and when we spoke I mentioned sharing a room and he said nothing and planning my life around him is stupid and if he wants some privacy with me this summer he'll just have to rent his own damn place. Because I'm saving my money for drum lessons and rock climbing gym memberships! Also organic food. And a couple tattoos if I ever decide I truly want that. I keep looking at my shoulder blades, deciding if the adventure/nurturing balance that is my life is significant enough to alter my body for. A friend mentioned that whenever you get a tattoo it's an exercise on relearning how to love your body. Change it and then accept and love the change. And then someday hope to find a lenient Jewish cemetary.
Okay, they keep selling out, but I'm seeing the Chili Peppers live again.
*Be stronger be braver be less lazy less weak to not be ruled by my fears or apathy but figure out what I want and run towards it. To actually take drum lessons this summer, may something strike me down if I don't get off my ass and do this, I will scrimp, I will save, I will share shitty housing but I'm making enough to afford drum lessons. And I will become worthy of the cheap drum set I own and I will find other people to play with and I'll join a band and make music that means something to me and gives me the feeling that the Chili Peppers, Tom Vek, Minor Threat, Godspeed You Black Enperor! give me, that there's so much more to life.
I'm not articulating this at all. I just love this band, and I love music and how it can make me feel. And I will continue my quest to have an amazing extradorinary life, and find a way to help and benefit others in the process. And I'm going to stop lounging about at my parents house in the suburbs, vacations over, and I'm going to take care of the things I need to take care of (change oil in car, fix laptop disaster, write to uncle with cancer, visit old work and finally give them invoice for services rendered long ago)and then I'm going to go to the desert for a week (hoped to be as good idea as it sounded when it first popped into my head) and then I'm moving to the bay area to start the next chapter in my life.
In more coherent less didadic news I mentioned to my father my possible desire to be a travel writer and he made the good suggestion of checking out travel magazines and see if there are any instructional books. And I'll be damned if there aren't several books entitled things like "Find Fun and Profit Through Travel Writing: A How To Guide." So I'm going to check that out and start writing and send stuff out to magazines and the like, just for practice. I figure if I'm lucky some of the rejections will include constructive criticism. Okay, that's fairly optimistic, but it will be good practice and I think tall shipping and possible the Thai cult abduction will make good stories.
Also, my perfect bay area housing fell through. So now I'm back at square one, though I am there with two friends. So now we have to find new cheap bay area housing for the three of us. I want to share a room to be frugal but this nagging voice keeps reminding me of the boy, and what of him, and what if he spends the summer with me. And then I have to sternly remind myself that he has given me no notices or promises as to his summer plans, and when we spoke I mentioned sharing a room and he said nothing and planning my life around him is stupid and if he wants some privacy with me this summer he'll just have to rent his own damn place. Because I'm saving my money for drum lessons and rock climbing gym memberships! Also organic food. And a couple tattoos if I ever decide I truly want that. I keep looking at my shoulder blades, deciding if the adventure/nurturing balance that is my life is significant enough to alter my body for. A friend mentioned that whenever you get a tattoo it's an exercise on relearning how to love your body. Change it and then accept and love the change. And then someday hope to find a lenient Jewish cemetary.
Okay, they keep selling out, but I'm seeing the Chili Peppers live again.