Requiem for a Flame
No one ever wants to imagine that their home or the home of their loved ones will ever have a fire. But that's exactly what happened on Monday.
I woke up around 5:30 a.m. because I couldn't sleep, and of course my cure for everything is a nice warm bath. Also I couldn't wait to get back to my book - I've been reading Shirley Conran's classic trashy novel of sex, deceit, and Lace. Everyone remembers it as the made-for-TV movie where Phoebe Cates demands to know, "Which one of you bitches is my mother?". I was in the bath when I heard my dad come inside and say, "Barb, I think your mother's house is on fire." I immediately jumped out of the tub and dressed hurriedly. I kept thinking it couldn't possibly be true, perhaps it was just something burning in the stove. I ran out behind my dad to my grandma's front porch and unlocked the door. When I opened it, clouds of black smoke roiled out. There really was a fire. I couldn't get inside: there was too much smoke. I ran back to my place to get some boots and a blanket to wrap around me. I thought maybe if I could pull that over me, I would be able to get inside. As soon as I hit my door, I yelled to Paul and told him what was going on. Running back for the porch, my mom was sitting in the rocking chair beside the door, sobbing and holding it open. I still couldn't get inside. Every time I tried, I was quickly choked with smoke. I ran back inside my mom's house, where my dad was trying to call 911. Our home phone wasn't working, so I grabbed my cell and called. Back outside my dad and I went to the back of Grandma's house, and there we could see inside her living room window that there was a blaze. Dad grabbed the hose beside his shop, and I helped him haul it to the window. He broke the window and started coating everything with water.
I left him with the hose when I heard sirens, so I ran to the driveway to direct the firetrucks in. They got out, and I yelled that there was someone inside. It seemed forever before any of them took action. I kept telling them my grandmother was inside. A few of the firefighters went inside finally. Seems my dad actually put out the fire, so all that was left was the sea of dismal smoke. The firefighters had to cut the power, so they disabled everything at my grandmother's house and proceeded trying to find her. I thought there was hope she had gotten out of the house and was safe somewhere outside. By this time our neighbors Tony and Judy had come to help, so Judy and I walked all around calling for my grandma. We didn't find her. Finally after awhile the firemen confirmed they had found my grandmother inside. She had already passed, though they couldn't tell if it was from smoke inhalation, heart attack, etc.
My mom throughout the whole ordeal was inconsolable. She kept saying, "What did I do?". She was blaming herself. In times of crisis, I just sort of shut down. I put my feelings and horrors aside and do whatever is necessary to help. After we found out my grandma was inside, the whole family just stayed to the side. By this time my brother and his wife had made it to the house. We all huddled around my mom. After what seemed like forever, one of the firemen came over to us. It was a guy that my brother had grown up with, played baseball and such. It was good to see a familiar, friendly face in the mess of unfamiliar firemen standing around everywhere. Scott let us know that a state investigator would have to come out in order to start a preliminary investigation on what caused the fire. The coroner showed up a bit after that. He was an older man, a country gentleman. He shook my and Paul's hands and told us how sorry he was for what was happening. By this time I had to change, ecause I kept smelling smoke on myself. My brother had one of the paramedics give oxygen to my mom, because she had actually made it inside farther than I did and inhaled enough to smoke to keep tasting it long after she had gone inside the smoky house. After that there was much waiting. Waiting on the fire inspector. Waiting to see what started the fire. For myself, I kept wondering if my grandmother had gotten burned. The investigators arrived, went inside, and then started their reports. They asked my dad and me questions about the events concerning what we had seen, and how we had come to call emergency. They informed us that an autopsy would have to be performed, which I figured would happen, because with any unattended death there has to be an autopsy. After the inspectors finished, they let us know that the funeral home was on the way to get my grandmother. Now Scott could finally tell my dad, my brother, and me that they think it was a space heater that caught fire. It must have been right beside her entertainment center, and once it caught fire, the blaze went up in a V-pattern up and down the walls. I asked if she was burned, and Scott said that no, the most she got was like a sunburn. They found her in the kitchen.
After the funeral home came to take my grandmother away, the firemen had also cleared out, and we were allowed to go inside. I had taken my mom inside so that she wouldn't see my grandma wheeled out, so she and Judy were busy inside while the rest of us went to see the damage. Everything was black. Only the living area got the worst of it. The entertainment center was mostly burned, the TV was melted. The grandfather clock that had been in our family for decades was gone. Pictures on the walls were gone. The fireman had taken out the couch, a small table, a few chairs, the recliner, and the desk.
You could see the imprint where my grandmother lay, just right inside the kitchen. She was on her side. That really messed with my head. We decided that my mom didn't need to see that.
Mom was worried about all of the pictures being destroyed, but luckily they weren't. Scott told us my Dad pretty much saved all that, along with mostly everything in the desk and table, with his quick thinking. Everyone aside from my mom and Judy (Tony, her husband, had left by then) started looking through the desk and table to see what could be salvaged. Aside from some minor fire and water damaged, almost everything was intact. We grabbed some boxes and started taking the pictures out of the albums. Paul stayed home from work, and helped take out the bulk of the pictures, with Cyrilla (my brother's wife) helping him. I kept checking on my mom, but she and Judy were doing normal stuff: washing clothes, straightening up, chatting. Finally Paul and I decided everyone could use some food, so we went and grabbed a mix of KFC and McDonald's. Not the most nourishing meal, but I knew we all needed to eat. One of my brother's best friends, Jay, had brought us some empty boxes and sat with us while we ate. I hadn't seem him since my brother's wedding, because Jay's friendship with my brother had been strained. I don't care what anyone says or would have said though, because Jay is just as much part of my family as anyone at the table that day. I introduce him as "my other brother".
The rest of the day alternated between making calls to the insurance company and the funeral home, making arrangements, resting; and busy work like cleaning up and protecting my mom's banana trees.
I didn't sleep well that night. I kept wondering things: if my grandmother was scared, if she thought the fire was something she could put out herself by getting water from the kitchen. It wasn't as if she couldn't get around or get out of the house, but knowing that stubborn old lady, I'm betting she thought she could take of it herself. Only she couldn't, and no one knew what was happening until it was too late.
The funeral is scheduled for Thursday. My grandmother didn't want visitation, so there will just be a short service and then the funeral. My brother is putting together the music, and I asked my brother if he would include Rasputina's version of "Wish You Were Here". My mom wants me to find some pictures to show my grandmother throughout her life. Tomorrow is going to be hard for everyone, especially my mom. But I feel safe in knowing that my grandma is in a better place.
No one ever wants to think anything like this can happen to them, but it can. So please - be safe in your own homes:
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I woke up around 5:30 a.m. because I couldn't sleep, and of course my cure for everything is a nice warm bath. Also I couldn't wait to get back to my book - I've been reading Shirley Conran's classic trashy novel of sex, deceit, and Lace. Everyone remembers it as the made-for-TV movie where Phoebe Cates demands to know, "Which one of you bitches is my mother?". I was in the bath when I heard my dad come inside and say, "Barb, I think your mother's house is on fire." I immediately jumped out of the tub and dressed hurriedly. I kept thinking it couldn't possibly be true, perhaps it was just something burning in the stove. I ran out behind my dad to my grandma's front porch and unlocked the door. When I opened it, clouds of black smoke roiled out. There really was a fire. I couldn't get inside: there was too much smoke. I ran back to my place to get some boots and a blanket to wrap around me. I thought maybe if I could pull that over me, I would be able to get inside. As soon as I hit my door, I yelled to Paul and told him what was going on. Running back for the porch, my mom was sitting in the rocking chair beside the door, sobbing and holding it open. I still couldn't get inside. Every time I tried, I was quickly choked with smoke. I ran back inside my mom's house, where my dad was trying to call 911. Our home phone wasn't working, so I grabbed my cell and called. Back outside my dad and I went to the back of Grandma's house, and there we could see inside her living room window that there was a blaze. Dad grabbed the hose beside his shop, and I helped him haul it to the window. He broke the window and started coating everything with water.
I left him with the hose when I heard sirens, so I ran to the driveway to direct the firetrucks in. They got out, and I yelled that there was someone inside. It seemed forever before any of them took action. I kept telling them my grandmother was inside. A few of the firefighters went inside finally. Seems my dad actually put out the fire, so all that was left was the sea of dismal smoke. The firefighters had to cut the power, so they disabled everything at my grandmother's house and proceeded trying to find her. I thought there was hope she had gotten out of the house and was safe somewhere outside. By this time our neighbors Tony and Judy had come to help, so Judy and I walked all around calling for my grandma. We didn't find her. Finally after awhile the firemen confirmed they had found my grandmother inside. She had already passed, though they couldn't tell if it was from smoke inhalation, heart attack, etc.
My mom throughout the whole ordeal was inconsolable. She kept saying, "What did I do?". She was blaming herself. In times of crisis, I just sort of shut down. I put my feelings and horrors aside and do whatever is necessary to help. After we found out my grandma was inside, the whole family just stayed to the side. By this time my brother and his wife had made it to the house. We all huddled around my mom. After what seemed like forever, one of the firemen came over to us. It was a guy that my brother had grown up with, played baseball and such. It was good to see a familiar, friendly face in the mess of unfamiliar firemen standing around everywhere. Scott let us know that a state investigator would have to come out in order to start a preliminary investigation on what caused the fire. The coroner showed up a bit after that. He was an older man, a country gentleman. He shook my and Paul's hands and told us how sorry he was for what was happening. By this time I had to change, ecause I kept smelling smoke on myself. My brother had one of the paramedics give oxygen to my mom, because she had actually made it inside farther than I did and inhaled enough to smoke to keep tasting it long after she had gone inside the smoky house. After that there was much waiting. Waiting on the fire inspector. Waiting to see what started the fire. For myself, I kept wondering if my grandmother had gotten burned. The investigators arrived, went inside, and then started their reports. They asked my dad and me questions about the events concerning what we had seen, and how we had come to call emergency. They informed us that an autopsy would have to be performed, which I figured would happen, because with any unattended death there has to be an autopsy. After the inspectors finished, they let us know that the funeral home was on the way to get my grandmother. Now Scott could finally tell my dad, my brother, and me that they think it was a space heater that caught fire. It must have been right beside her entertainment center, and once it caught fire, the blaze went up in a V-pattern up and down the walls. I asked if she was burned, and Scott said that no, the most she got was like a sunburn. They found her in the kitchen.
After the funeral home came to take my grandmother away, the firemen had also cleared out, and we were allowed to go inside. I had taken my mom inside so that she wouldn't see my grandma wheeled out, so she and Judy were busy inside while the rest of us went to see the damage. Everything was black. Only the living area got the worst of it. The entertainment center was mostly burned, the TV was melted. The grandfather clock that had been in our family for decades was gone. Pictures on the walls were gone. The fireman had taken out the couch, a small table, a few chairs, the recliner, and the desk.
You could see the imprint where my grandmother lay, just right inside the kitchen. She was on her side. That really messed with my head. We decided that my mom didn't need to see that.
Mom was worried about all of the pictures being destroyed, but luckily they weren't. Scott told us my Dad pretty much saved all that, along with mostly everything in the desk and table, with his quick thinking. Everyone aside from my mom and Judy (Tony, her husband, had left by then) started looking through the desk and table to see what could be salvaged. Aside from some minor fire and water damaged, almost everything was intact. We grabbed some boxes and started taking the pictures out of the albums. Paul stayed home from work, and helped take out the bulk of the pictures, with Cyrilla (my brother's wife) helping him. I kept checking on my mom, but she and Judy were doing normal stuff: washing clothes, straightening up, chatting. Finally Paul and I decided everyone could use some food, so we went and grabbed a mix of KFC and McDonald's. Not the most nourishing meal, but I knew we all needed to eat. One of my brother's best friends, Jay, had brought us some empty boxes and sat with us while we ate. I hadn't seem him since my brother's wedding, because Jay's friendship with my brother had been strained. I don't care what anyone says or would have said though, because Jay is just as much part of my family as anyone at the table that day. I introduce him as "my other brother".
The rest of the day alternated between making calls to the insurance company and the funeral home, making arrangements, resting; and busy work like cleaning up and protecting my mom's banana trees.
I didn't sleep well that night. I kept wondering things: if my grandmother was scared, if she thought the fire was something she could put out herself by getting water from the kitchen. It wasn't as if she couldn't get around or get out of the house, but knowing that stubborn old lady, I'm betting she thought she could take of it herself. Only she couldn't, and no one knew what was happening until it was too late.
The funeral is scheduled for Thursday. My grandmother didn't want visitation, so there will just be a short service and then the funeral. My brother is putting together the music, and I asked my brother if he would include Rasputina's version of "Wish You Were Here". My mom wants me to find some pictures to show my grandmother throughout her life. Tomorrow is going to be hard for everyone, especially my mom. But I feel safe in knowing that my grandma is in a better place.
No one ever wants to think anything like this can happen to them, but it can. So please - be safe in your own homes:
- Be sure to check and replace batteries in smoke alarms in your home and the homes of your loved ones if they are unable to do this themselves.
- Make sure there is a plan for fire exits and that there is a way to call for help.
- Don't leave unnecessary electrical items plugged in if they aren't being used.
- Make sure you have at least one fire extinguisher.
- Space heaters need space! Be sure they are placed at least three feet from any furniture or walls.
- Something many people may not know: be sure that the exhaust duct in your dryer is free of debris and not clogged up. Lint buildup and improper venting can lead to dryer fires.
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