(no subject)
Hello and good evening. Lets start the show tonight with Kelslore! Hit it boys!
I don't know what the sick i'm trying to write here in this monkey shit peanut of a journal. Did I melt someone? did I inflate an ego? Did I build a bridge between a connecting oposing nipple with hair and a bad disposition to a guy named Jeff Darcy. Is a whole long line of pre dated Donny B DNA strands filling up my mind like a bad ear worm.
All I know is that I don't know nothing!
WOOOO!
Ow mommy it hurts! Lets try again with power! But the truth is the truth is. I'm actualy a poindexter nerd with bifoculs and a original star trek uniform. A gold one too none of that red shit. What the hell am I? I don't have a social order and it's madness madnesS! My ribs hurt! NyaH hA Ha ha!
I can see myself way off into the future somewhere off in that dark place farther away than here like in a bathroom stall trying to take a quick nap and hoping for some kind of food to magicaly dispense from the toilet paper roll. Then we shoot inside the warp and see my ass standing somewhere with no pants on screaming as a huge laser bursts forth from my urethra UREETHRA! COME URETHRA! RISE FORTH AND TAKE BATTLE WITH KING OF MONSTERS!
Holy fuck my body hurts!
Yay!
I'm totally hung like an inphant it's gooder than bad and sometimes I look at boobs and think what it would be like to play a quick game of sorry all over um. But I must remain strong for I am me! And that means jack shit!
I begin my story on a cold summer day with a dark storm rising from every inch of every humans inner mind where they store their favorite Friends episoads. Why? Ha? Cause that's the way it happened back when we used to get drunker than ten indians. WOooo! Behold the bottom of the top of the middle. Where's the hole? Shit! I sware I SWARE!
MOMMA GET BACK IN JEFFS HOUSE!
Dude fat people they're after the salami industries secrets I watched them with their plastic white knives mounting their sturdy electric powered scooters. The lightning flashed one bright boom and they were off down that canyon like crazed vikings in search for fresh virgins. Exactly how many virgins we could never know.
At the factory of the deli Gods we all struggled to get the ultimate weapon in place to ward off our portly foes. But we knew that the lord Derek would soon be upon us with his gnashing teeth that slaughter with the motion of grinding bones. The octogon was almost completed when I heard it! The electric scooters crashing through the outter walls! It was time to inject myself in the ass with the date rape drug to escape my enemys horrible deadly wrath. And then as I began to lose concousness I saw a friend of mine run past with mooky stinks flying from his flaring anus! It was amazing and it gave me an idea the idea to start a band.
Yup this band was glorious and lead to the creation of a MUD wich in turn lead into a lot of masturbation wich in turn lead into a TV sHOW! And then I began to sweat bullets and puke dark thick blood. For I knew that I was going to become a film director not the comic book artist writer I had hoped and dreamed to be before. No a sleezy film guy with huge breasted girls giving him oral pleasure always and forever. This was ungnarly and soon I began to see my dream of being fat and bald slipping away with my mind that had begun to take over my body and tell it to do stupid shit like chew on metalic objects and try to murge with random people. And I just can't seem to murge! It's not my fault! The other person doesn't own a set of muraccas! How am I suppose to sing lead vocals in my band when all they give me is teen angst and a big homophobic agenda?
But when we try to go and make pretzes like those little carts on the sides of streets I realise that I haven't been anywhere and I'm a nerd and I will never achieve tasty pretzel goodness like so many young men who have occomplished great deeds under the guidances of their parents who chuck fifty dollar bills at them as if to say "hey snort crack."
And I look back on everything I just wrote in under ten minutes and it pleases me because it was filled with the deep dark secrets of my soul filled with even dark weird things like hot girls I wanna do riding glowing radioactive hot dog weeners!
AND THEN A TRAIN GOES THROUGH A TUNNEL AND I WAKE UP IN A PUDDLE!
I don't know what the sick i'm trying to write here in this monkey shit peanut of a journal. Did I melt someone? did I inflate an ego? Did I build a bridge between a connecting oposing nipple with hair and a bad disposition to a guy named Jeff Darcy. Is a whole long line of pre dated Donny B DNA strands filling up my mind like a bad ear worm.
All I know is that I don't know nothing!
WOOOO!
Ow mommy it hurts! Lets try again with power! But the truth is the truth is. I'm actualy a poindexter nerd with bifoculs and a original star trek uniform. A gold one too none of that red shit. What the hell am I? I don't have a social order and it's madness madnesS! My ribs hurt! NyaH hA Ha ha!
I can see myself way off into the future somewhere off in that dark place farther away than here like in a bathroom stall trying to take a quick nap and hoping for some kind of food to magicaly dispense from the toilet paper roll. Then we shoot inside the warp and see my ass standing somewhere with no pants on screaming as a huge laser bursts forth from my urethra UREETHRA! COME URETHRA! RISE FORTH AND TAKE BATTLE WITH KING OF MONSTERS!
Holy fuck my body hurts!
Yay!
I'm totally hung like an inphant it's gooder than bad and sometimes I look at boobs and think what it would be like to play a quick game of sorry all over um. But I must remain strong for I am me! And that means jack shit!
I begin my story on a cold summer day with a dark storm rising from every inch of every humans inner mind where they store their favorite Friends episoads. Why? Ha? Cause that's the way it happened back when we used to get drunker than ten indians. WOooo! Behold the bottom of the top of the middle. Where's the hole? Shit! I sware I SWARE!
MOMMA GET BACK IN JEFFS HOUSE!
Dude fat people they're after the salami industries secrets I watched them with their plastic white knives mounting their sturdy electric powered scooters. The lightning flashed one bright boom and they were off down that canyon like crazed vikings in search for fresh virgins. Exactly how many virgins we could never know.
At the factory of the deli Gods we all struggled to get the ultimate weapon in place to ward off our portly foes. But we knew that the lord Derek would soon be upon us with his gnashing teeth that slaughter with the motion of grinding bones. The octogon was almost completed when I heard it! The electric scooters crashing through the outter walls! It was time to inject myself in the ass with the date rape drug to escape my enemys horrible deadly wrath. And then as I began to lose concousness I saw a friend of mine run past with mooky stinks flying from his flaring anus! It was amazing and it gave me an idea the idea to start a band.
Yup this band was glorious and lead to the creation of a MUD wich in turn lead into a lot of masturbation wich in turn lead into a TV sHOW! And then I began to sweat bullets and puke dark thick blood. For I knew that I was going to become a film director not the comic book artist writer I had hoped and dreamed to be before. No a sleezy film guy with huge breasted girls giving him oral pleasure always and forever. This was ungnarly and soon I began to see my dream of being fat and bald slipping away with my mind that had begun to take over my body and tell it to do stupid shit like chew on metalic objects and try to murge with random people. And I just can't seem to murge! It's not my fault! The other person doesn't own a set of muraccas! How am I suppose to sing lead vocals in my band when all they give me is teen angst and a big homophobic agenda?
But when we try to go and make pretzes like those little carts on the sides of streets I realise that I haven't been anywhere and I'm a nerd and I will never achieve tasty pretzel goodness like so many young men who have occomplished great deeds under the guidances of their parents who chuck fifty dollar bills at them as if to say "hey snort crack."
And I look back on everything I just wrote in under ten minutes and it pleases me because it was filled with the deep dark secrets of my soul filled with even dark weird things like hot girls I wanna do riding glowing radioactive hot dog weeners!
AND THEN A TRAIN GOES THROUGH A TUNNEL AND I WAKE UP IN A PUDDLE!