(no subject)
The flood came. Now I'm homeless in the very technical sense of the word. Life is so in between and blah. I am absolutely exhausted; every molecule of my being needs rest.
I'm currently in a stranger's house, steps away from those looming mountains that used to awe me... Now it's like a fake Hollywood backdrop.
I want to get settled. Moving to Denver will be good, I think... if I can find a god damn apartment. Keep your fingers crossed for tomorrow.
It's hard being away from my family... It's hard only seeing Matt on the weekends... It's hard having no time... It's hard not having a home... It's hard leaving Tallulah in the care of friends indefinitely... It's hard constantly feeling like a shell of my former self.
I miss living well. Yoga, hiking, baking, films, scrabble, glasses of wine, reading novels, taking photos, knitting, etc. Now it's just.... Read, read, read, write, write, write, read, read, read, write, write, write. Nobody ever told me that life in an ivory tower is such fucking shit. I guess I should have figured that out my self.
So that's me lately... a deracinated, empty mess.
I'm currently in a stranger's house, steps away from those looming mountains that used to awe me... Now it's like a fake Hollywood backdrop.
I want to get settled. Moving to Denver will be good, I think... if I can find a god damn apartment. Keep your fingers crossed for tomorrow.
It's hard being away from my family... It's hard only seeing Matt on the weekends... It's hard having no time... It's hard not having a home... It's hard leaving Tallulah in the care of friends indefinitely... It's hard constantly feeling like a shell of my former self.
I miss living well. Yoga, hiking, baking, films, scrabble, glasses of wine, reading novels, taking photos, knitting, etc. Now it's just.... Read, read, read, write, write, write, read, read, read, write, write, write. Nobody ever told me that life in an ivory tower is such fucking shit. I guess I should have figured that out my self.
So that's me lately... a deracinated, empty mess.