BAHAMAVENTION!
There will be a real update soonish, but I was flipping through the channels and running from the infomercials when I landed on one about the Bahamas on E!. This thing was so freaking hilarious that I had to see if there was anything about it online.
Before my Bahamavention, I was wound so tight I needed a torque wrench to change into my gym shorts. But now I can put a Speedo brand European-cut swimsuit on with one hand...and I do!
Other infomercial quotes:
Even my balloon sculptures hinted at my unhappiness.
I tried to hide my non-tanness by making my own bronzer out of butterscotch pudding and waterproof deck varnish.
Before I ordered the pamphlet, I thought Carol attacked me just because I wasn't playing her daughter enough. Now I know that she was hurting and was simply reaching out to me for help...with a crowbar.
Before my Bahamavention, I was so white I couldn't wear myself after Labor Day.
Before my Bahamavention, my diet consisted mainly of sleeping pills, pen caps, milk of magnesia and fingernails. But now look at me, I'm eating chicken pot pie!
I wish there was a way for you to watch it, but here's some 30 second spots in the same advertising campaign.
It's a new campaign launched by the Bahama Department of Tourism and it is so brilliant. I laughed my ass off.
Before my Bahamavention, I was wound so tight I needed a torque wrench to change into my gym shorts. But now I can put a Speedo brand European-cut swimsuit on with one hand...and I do!
Other infomercial quotes:
Even my balloon sculptures hinted at my unhappiness.
I tried to hide my non-tanness by making my own bronzer out of butterscotch pudding and waterproof deck varnish.
Before I ordered the pamphlet, I thought Carol attacked me just because I wasn't playing her daughter enough. Now I know that she was hurting and was simply reaching out to me for help...with a crowbar.
Before my Bahamavention, I was so white I couldn't wear myself after Labor Day.
Before my Bahamavention, my diet consisted mainly of sleeping pills, pen caps, milk of magnesia and fingernails. But now look at me, I'm eating chicken pot pie!
I wish there was a way for you to watch it, but here's some 30 second spots in the same advertising campaign.
It's a new campaign launched by the Bahama Department of Tourism and it is so brilliant. I laughed my ass off.