Resolve
My ex called me today. I sounded civilized and she doesn't think I'm scary anymore. Sheer miscommunication meant that we both thought the other party hated each other. We were nice. We reminisced. It felt like I was in a relationship again. To feel so close to someone again it hurts. It seriously hurts.
Anyway, she has a girlfriend now and my sister has clearly instructed it is time to move on. Resolve has been achieved. I know I am still a worthy human being. Less dehumanized. Less crazy.
Still, the world is big and I don't know what to expect. I am shit scared from this point onwards but slightly happier.