(no subject)

Apr 28, 2005 12:18

I feel so strange right now. Physically I mean. I wonder if its all the caffeine I drank, or the amount of cigarettes I've smoked. Or perhaps, it maybe the fact that I have eaten less food this week than I usually do, and my body is not used to it. Today I barely ate at all. Not that I'm starving myself, just that I dont have food at home and no cash on me and I havent felt like going to get food... I still have some cleaning to do up here on the second floor, which I hoped to have done by today, but with the way I'm feeling, I don't know if that is going to happen. "suck it up, just do it... you'll get paid", i tell myself. With that in mind who knows, maybe it'll get done, I can always eat later. My mind has been racing the past week, especially today. About my life its direction and all the things I have planned. It seems so nice in thought, but in reality is it too much.. A lot is coming up, I wonder if I can handle it. And to take on more then I've already committed to, are thoughts of mine. I love my life right now, it doesn't need to change much, though in thought I want more. In thought so much more, is it unrealistic? Is it too much too selfish? Is is neecessary? In thought it is nice, reality beautiful, but again back to those questions... I don't need more than I have today, however, I could want. And if there is possibility to achieve my wants is that wrong... Is that something to work towards, or is my plate already full enough, and those things are unnecessary.

I went to the dentist today.. I don't mind the dentist like some people do. I just think it is funny how they try to talk to you, ask questions with their hands and tools in your mouth, like what your supposed to choke on all of that to answer, is whined up spitting all over their face with a struggled response. I dont know I found amusement in that thought.
Previous post Next post
Up