yay! winter break releases energy in my mind!!!!!
so after a grueling couple of weeks (oh, they'll get harder till next year) ive been through the "get through the final tests, finish up that project and all your quizzes and study for those finals!" in between my life of what is officially known as work and come home; ive finally felt that peace in my mind ive been craving for since august.
and i guess in your second year in college (no matter what school youre attending) the student just tends to drift off into a million different worries. this issue becomes very, very depressing. ive been sucked into this depression for quite some time. it makes the student feel very unsure of themselves, scared of the world ahead of them, and to say the least- flat ass broke! the common themes of majors, relationships, work, family, friends, and image rewind in one's mind over and over and over again. this equals a depressing state. in the midst of running around like chickens with their heads cut off (probably the closest sympathy carnivors have with vegetarians) everything in life seems useless, dull and quite unaccomplished.
a customer told me the other day (yesterday i believe) that once youre in college, no one is there, expected to motivate you to do good in school, unlike those high school years. and its so true. no one gives a fuck what youre doing in college- even if youre making good grades. youre practically kicked to the curb after high school expecting to take on the world and let you deal with your life as you fall flat on your ass. no one gives a fuck. and yet, two years after high school i, for one, can not seem to fathom such a thought as to why the motivation has become so vague. where as the only concerns from loved ones (assuming friends are in the same boat as you) are your fucking grades. i can easily go off into a few topics right here...but ill try to refrain. personally, i dont know where im going with this whole post to begin with. but yes, you say you choose career A and your whole family actually expects you to pass all the classes and become one step closer to having them say...yea my so and so is a blahblahblah. and once you tell them, yea that whole thing isnt working out too well- they'll just give you their story of how they fought through college and ended up in their current job. yea, thanks for the support.
but i guess (to hurry up and conclude my current rant) that we all go through similar phases because thats just life. we strive to look, feel, act and nontheless do our best for the simple satisfaction of getting recognized by others. and thats what its all about- how our simple minds branch out to the world, showing them what we've got only to recognize the impact we've made on their lives. to make us vulnerable to understanding their concepts and leveling with them so that we may simply have a conversation with them- you know, something in common.
yea i dont really know where im going off into this whole mess. id like to finish it off because i really havent exposed my mind's thoughts into words as of late and thats probably one of the depressing factors- having no one to turn to to let our brains breathe from all the cluter of thoughts we've piled on over the weeks.
so heres a final summary:
- we strive too hard for others: in work, school, friendships, relationships and family matters.
for what? who knows. its just a way to feel included to our simple "outside worlds" and guess what? when that doesnt even happens- life is the pits. for weeks ive felt that im stuck in a huge ditch with nothing going for me. today, i realized that getting a new computer monitor at work, led me to succumming in cleaning up the desk. this time i got to reorganize it and you know what- it feels good! accomplishing the simple things in life- say even your car, will really help you out for the day and hopefully give you a more positive outlook for atleast a little while. marija and i, have had quite the many discussions on that one...but its true.
THE SIMPLE THINGS ARE WHAT COUNTS IN LIFE. as far as everything else, i have no response, because im still actually in the same ditch i was in weeks ago. i just made it a little more comfortable. yea my mind is drifting off in far too many places than it was prior to my beginning stages of thought- so there goes that. cheers, best of luck to you all and yea!
and i guess in your second year in college (no matter what school youre attending) the student just tends to drift off into a million different worries. this issue becomes very, very depressing. ive been sucked into this depression for quite some time. it makes the student feel very unsure of themselves, scared of the world ahead of them, and to say the least- flat ass broke! the common themes of majors, relationships, work, family, friends, and image rewind in one's mind over and over and over again. this equals a depressing state. in the midst of running around like chickens with their heads cut off (probably the closest sympathy carnivors have with vegetarians) everything in life seems useless, dull and quite unaccomplished.
a customer told me the other day (yesterday i believe) that once youre in college, no one is there, expected to motivate you to do good in school, unlike those high school years. and its so true. no one gives a fuck what youre doing in college- even if youre making good grades. youre practically kicked to the curb after high school expecting to take on the world and let you deal with your life as you fall flat on your ass. no one gives a fuck. and yet, two years after high school i, for one, can not seem to fathom such a thought as to why the motivation has become so vague. where as the only concerns from loved ones (assuming friends are in the same boat as you) are your fucking grades. i can easily go off into a few topics right here...but ill try to refrain. personally, i dont know where im going with this whole post to begin with. but yes, you say you choose career A and your whole family actually expects you to pass all the classes and become one step closer to having them say...yea my so and so is a blahblahblah. and once you tell them, yea that whole thing isnt working out too well- they'll just give you their story of how they fought through college and ended up in their current job. yea, thanks for the support.
but i guess (to hurry up and conclude my current rant) that we all go through similar phases because thats just life. we strive to look, feel, act and nontheless do our best for the simple satisfaction of getting recognized by others. and thats what its all about- how our simple minds branch out to the world, showing them what we've got only to recognize the impact we've made on their lives. to make us vulnerable to understanding their concepts and leveling with them so that we may simply have a conversation with them- you know, something in common.
yea i dont really know where im going off into this whole mess. id like to finish it off because i really havent exposed my mind's thoughts into words as of late and thats probably one of the depressing factors- having no one to turn to to let our brains breathe from all the cluter of thoughts we've piled on over the weeks.
so heres a final summary:
- we strive too hard for others: in work, school, friendships, relationships and family matters.
for what? who knows. its just a way to feel included to our simple "outside worlds" and guess what? when that doesnt even happens- life is the pits. for weeks ive felt that im stuck in a huge ditch with nothing going for me. today, i realized that getting a new computer monitor at work, led me to succumming in cleaning up the desk. this time i got to reorganize it and you know what- it feels good! accomplishing the simple things in life- say even your car, will really help you out for the day and hopefully give you a more positive outlook for atleast a little while. marija and i, have had quite the many discussions on that one...but its true.
THE SIMPLE THINGS ARE WHAT COUNTS IN LIFE. as far as everything else, i have no response, because im still actually in the same ditch i was in weeks ago. i just made it a little more comfortable. yea my mind is drifting off in far too many places than it was prior to my beginning stages of thought- so there goes that. cheers, best of luck to you all and yea!