ssdd
today was the same as yesturday...except less snow and the same 'ol matt shit. well its really my shit but he is the subject of it. i cant blame him the only thing he did was dump me. i just dot know how im supossed to just wake up and be fine. i know all my friends are getting sick of me. i wish there was a way i oculd just forget about everything that had ever happend. all the memories and fun times we had together. iwish he could just read what i write and maybe start to feel sad. not guilty (cuz god forbid that ever where to happen) but just to see that just cuz he is happy doesnt mean im gonna be happy. everyone say everyday gets a little better. i have found it is just the same as the day before.
im trying to be happy and get by day by day but its so hard to. i dont think no one really knows the real me. matt knows how i used to be and how happy i was. i can be like that again i just need reasurance sometimes. i know i get jealous and depressed but im a 16 year old gril trying to find someone to love and to be loved by someone. i feel like im growing up to fast. i havent really enjoyed this year at all. its going so fast. i keep thinking about the future and not what i have infront of me. its like thinking of whats for dessert while your eating supper.im so scared of so many things and i have no one to comfort me w/ them. all i want is alittle help from thoes who care. hmm i hope this will get better.
love shrtstop
im trying to be happy and get by day by day but its so hard to. i dont think no one really knows the real me. matt knows how i used to be and how happy i was. i can be like that again i just need reasurance sometimes. i know i get jealous and depressed but im a 16 year old gril trying to find someone to love and to be loved by someone. i feel like im growing up to fast. i havent really enjoyed this year at all. its going so fast. i keep thinking about the future and not what i have infront of me. its like thinking of whats for dessert while your eating supper.im so scared of so many things and i have no one to comfort me w/ them. all i want is alittle help from thoes who care. hmm i hope this will get better.
love shrtstop