AAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
So today I'm a little loopy. Lawrence and I broke up yesterday and it's been extremely difficult. We have to talk about the kids, the house, the laptop, things like that. It's almost like we were married. He came to get his stuff and it was so hard not to act the same way with each other. I love him, but it was too little too late. He realized last week what I needed, and was ready to give me that just when I had decided that I couldn't do what we were doing anymore. I have never had to have someone moving their things out like that before. It makes me want to crawl in a hole and sleep for a week. I feel like such a mean person. He's the only father she's ever known and he's gone. I did that. That makes me sad. I have been back and forth between hysterical laughing and incontrollable bawling all evening. I'm not sure which one I prefer. I didn't think I would cry so much, honestly. I had it set in my head, so now that it's happening I'm not usually so attached. Usually it's done and that's it. It's just odd. I feel displaced...