honey, this mirror isn't big enough for the two of us
Good afternoon. It's Tuesday. I have consumed a cup of coffee approximately the size of my head, and yet I'm still not alert. So it goes.
Last week I threatened to post Frank Iero picspam. Pretty much everyone promised me dire threats in return if I did not deliver. Well, you asked for it, and it isn't dial-up friendly:
This is Frank Iero:
I think he is really, really ridiculously good-looking. He was born on Halloween. He's from New Jersey.
And that's just his face! There's more!
Frank likes Batman. He has tattoos and wears makeup and is smart and articulate and funny and also kind of a little shit.
That's not an insult, mind you. I often describe myself as a punk-ass little shit. Frank's just better at it than I am.
Do you need a minute after that one? I know I do. That's okay. Frank can get comfortable while we wait.
Really comfortable.
But we can't wait too long. We don't want Frank to get bored.
There's no telling what he'll do.
Are you ready? Okay. I'm going to continue.
I swear, this kind of thing makes me want to climb him like a tree. Well, Frank's not tall enough for a tree. I guess I want to climb him like a ridiculously sexy shrubbery.
Frank plays rhythm guitar and does backup vocals for a band called My Chemical Romance.
Maybe you've heard of them. (For those who don't know, from left to right: Bob Bryar, drums; Mikey Way, bass guitar; Gerard Way, lead singer; Ray Toro, lead guitar & backup vocals; Frank Iero, rhythm guitar & backup vocals.)
They've been getting kind of big lately.
It's okay if you haven't heard of them, although I'm not sure how you found your way here.
Neither is Frank.
Don't worry, though. He's just like that. With his tongue. He's very friendly with it. Just ask his band.
Please note that Frank is not a lesbian.
No matter how many times Frank insists he's a lesbian, he is, in fact, a boy.
Don't get me wrong. I think Frank would make a smoking hot lesbian. But even in a pink hoodie, he's a boy.
But I don't want to silence you, Frank. Claim whatever sexual orientation you like.
Because you're pretty, oh so pretty.
Pretty like a princess.
I love boys who rock tiaras. And pink belts.
And Frank seems to like wearing them.
What else does Frank like to do? He likes to flip people off.
And annoy Bob, their seriously adorable drummer.
Frank also likes to stick things in his mouth.
He admittedly can't cook, so he has to put something in there.
I suspect he has an oral fixation.
I know you people are having dirty thoughts about what I just wrote.
It's okay. I could take the opportunity to talk about how I have an oral fixation, too, and that Frank and I own the same T-shirts and like the same punk bands and we're both short and how we're obviously totally meant to be, but I won't. Because I am a rational adult.
Frank gets a little wild when he plays.
And by a little, I mean a lot. Sometimes he falls on Bob. Poor Bob. And didn't he cut Ray once when one of the machine heads came off his guitar? Poor Ray.
I have so many pictures where he's doing stuff like this.
From that, I think you can assume that I like it when he does this.
And this.
It's pretty awesome, really.
Because intensity can be sexy.
Especially intensity directed at someone else.
Anyway, when Frank gets crazy, he also gets all flushed and sweaty.
And there's very little bad there.
Mm. Hi, Frank.
Frank does not have much of an ass. It's tragic, really.
It's okay, though. I mean, if Frank also had a great ass, I would probably spontaneously combust. And for our ass needs, we always have Gerard.
Holy motherfucking pants, G. I approve. So many dudes wear saggy pants these days. It makes it difficult to ogle.
There are other reasons why we need Gerard. Like, for his voice and his anime eyes.
And because he looks good in uniform.
And because he's total geeknip, what with the comics and D&D and Bloodsport references.
And because he gives makeup tips, while Frank apparently is the designated necktie man.
And because sometimes he's just incredibly beautiful.
I know I'm getting distracted from Frank, but I did promise prncsmoonbeam some Gerard pictures. So just one more G for the road.
Back to Frank!
If you spend a lot of time looking at Frank, and I do, you can ballpark when a picture was taken by Frank's tattoos. That sounds kind of creepy. I'm not stalking you, Frank! I'm... observing you FOR SCIENCE.
If we can figure out how Frank is so hot, maybe we can market it.
Totally for science.
I also like looking at Frank for his awsome T-shirts.
And because he has the best smile.
If Frank smiled at me like that, I'd walk into a pole or trip over a fire hydrant.
I also love Frank's other faces.
The really, really dorky ones.
And that Frank often says things to his bandmates that earn him this kind of reaction.
In fact, I love all of his bandmates. I think they're keen.
I'm not exactly running out of things to say about Frank. I could mention that he got the scorpion tattooed so high on his neck so he could never get a real job. I should quit my job and join a band and get a tattoo so I can never work in a cubicle again! Except perhaps I should learn how to play something other than the clarinet first. I sense a fatal flaw in my cunning plan.
There's also the problem that there are only so many versions of "hachi machi" before I start to bore myself.
And Frank is just really distracting.
Hands up if you've lost hours on Buzznet due to Frank.
I know I'm not the only one.
I won't tell you how many hours. Oh, it's not like I think you're going to judge me.
It's just that I honestly don't know.
Time flies when you're busy being an internet pervert.
But I'm going to wind this down.
Because this post is already massive.
Frank has other stuff to do, and so do I.
And no doubt I'll be seeing him later.
Bye-bye, Frank!
And to think that's only about 10% of my picture collection.
Last week I threatened to post Frank Iero picspam. Pretty much everyone promised me dire threats in return if I did not deliver. Well, you asked for it, and it isn't dial-up friendly:
This is Frank Iero:
I think he is really, really ridiculously good-looking. He was born on Halloween. He's from New Jersey.
And that's just his face! There's more!
Frank likes Batman. He has tattoos and wears makeup and is smart and articulate and funny and also kind of a little shit.
That's not an insult, mind you. I often describe myself as a punk-ass little shit. Frank's just better at it than I am.
Do you need a minute after that one? I know I do. That's okay. Frank can get comfortable while we wait.
Really comfortable.
But we can't wait too long. We don't want Frank to get bored.
There's no telling what he'll do.
Are you ready? Okay. I'm going to continue.
I swear, this kind of thing makes me want to climb him like a tree. Well, Frank's not tall enough for a tree. I guess I want to climb him like a ridiculously sexy shrubbery.
Frank plays rhythm guitar and does backup vocals for a band called My Chemical Romance.
Maybe you've heard of them. (For those who don't know, from left to right: Bob Bryar, drums; Mikey Way, bass guitar; Gerard Way, lead singer; Ray Toro, lead guitar & backup vocals; Frank Iero, rhythm guitar & backup vocals.)
They've been getting kind of big lately.
It's okay if you haven't heard of them, although I'm not sure how you found your way here.
Neither is Frank.
Don't worry, though. He's just like that. With his tongue. He's very friendly with it. Just ask his band.
Please note that Frank is not a lesbian.
No matter how many times Frank insists he's a lesbian, he is, in fact, a boy.
Don't get me wrong. I think Frank would make a smoking hot lesbian. But even in a pink hoodie, he's a boy.
But I don't want to silence you, Frank. Claim whatever sexual orientation you like.
Because you're pretty, oh so pretty.
Pretty like a princess.
I love boys who rock tiaras. And pink belts.
And Frank seems to like wearing them.
What else does Frank like to do? He likes to flip people off.
And annoy Bob, their seriously adorable drummer.
Frank also likes to stick things in his mouth.
He admittedly can't cook, so he has to put something in there.
I suspect he has an oral fixation.
I know you people are having dirty thoughts about what I just wrote.
It's okay. I could take the opportunity to talk about how I have an oral fixation, too, and that Frank and I own the same T-shirts and like the same punk bands and we're both short and how we're obviously totally meant to be, but I won't. Because I am a rational adult.
Frank gets a little wild when he plays.
And by a little, I mean a lot. Sometimes he falls on Bob. Poor Bob. And didn't he cut Ray once when one of the machine heads came off his guitar? Poor Ray.
I have so many pictures where he's doing stuff like this.
From that, I think you can assume that I like it when he does this.
And this.
It's pretty awesome, really.
Because intensity can be sexy.
Especially intensity directed at someone else.
Anyway, when Frank gets crazy, he also gets all flushed and sweaty.
And there's very little bad there.
Mm. Hi, Frank.
Frank does not have much of an ass. It's tragic, really.
It's okay, though. I mean, if Frank also had a great ass, I would probably spontaneously combust. And for our ass needs, we always have Gerard.
Holy motherfucking pants, G. I approve. So many dudes wear saggy pants these days. It makes it difficult to ogle.
There are other reasons why we need Gerard. Like, for his voice and his anime eyes.
And because he looks good in uniform.
And because he's total geeknip, what with the comics and D&D and Bloodsport references.
And because he gives makeup tips, while Frank apparently is the designated necktie man.
And because sometimes he's just incredibly beautiful.
I know I'm getting distracted from Frank, but I did promise prncsmoonbeam some Gerard pictures. So just one more G for the road.
Back to Frank!
If you spend a lot of time looking at Frank, and I do, you can ballpark when a picture was taken by Frank's tattoos. That sounds kind of creepy. I'm not stalking you, Frank! I'm... observing you FOR SCIENCE.
If we can figure out how Frank is so hot, maybe we can market it.
Totally for science.
I also like looking at Frank for his awsome T-shirts.
And because he has the best smile.
If Frank smiled at me like that, I'd walk into a pole or trip over a fire hydrant.
I also love Frank's other faces.
The really, really dorky ones.
And that Frank often says things to his bandmates that earn him this kind of reaction.
In fact, I love all of his bandmates. I think they're keen.
I'm not exactly running out of things to say about Frank. I could mention that he got the scorpion tattooed so high on his neck so he could never get a real job. I should quit my job and join a band and get a tattoo so I can never work in a cubicle again! Except perhaps I should learn how to play something other than the clarinet first. I sense a fatal flaw in my cunning plan.
There's also the problem that there are only so many versions of "hachi machi" before I start to bore myself.
And Frank is just really distracting.
Hands up if you've lost hours on Buzznet due to Frank.
I know I'm not the only one.
I won't tell you how many hours. Oh, it's not like I think you're going to judge me.
It's just that I honestly don't know.
Time flies when you're busy being an internet pervert.
But I'm going to wind this down.
Because this post is already massive.
Frank has other stuff to do, and so do I.
And no doubt I'll be seeing him later.
Bye-bye, Frank!
And to think that's only about 10% of my picture collection.