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When I was younger, I loved singing. We're a singing family - family get-togethers usually involve "singsongs"; long journeys always involved "singsongs"; singing in cars and airports and in the park and at home... singing is a thing we all like doing.
When I got really ill as a teenager, one of the things that happened was that my voice went from being strong and confident to weak, and I was just too ill and low energy to join in late night singing sessions.
Also, my memory was Swiss-cheesed, so I forgot lyrics.
Embarrassing!
And I went to college, and there were no "singsongs". And I moved away, and there were no "singsongs". My parents-in-law sing in the church choir, yet singing as a family was not part of their lives.
And I missed it.
Coming home on visits, there would be "singsongs", and I became more and more acutely aware of how weak my voice was, so I avoided the old "This is showingup 's song - come on, love, give us a song!"
I hardly ever sing now. Except... I've been singing my Guru Ram Das mantra for the past 20 days.
I realised that I "lost my voice" at around the time when the gap between what was expected of me ("You can achieve anything you set your mind to") and my experience ("I am not achieving, so I am a failure") was getting wider, and at the time I was coming to think of myself as unheard and not worth hearing.
Also, illness with me often goes right to the throat.
Interesting. But reversible.
Because I know someone who teaches music. And I'd really like to learn to read music and play an instrument that doesn't mess up my hands for massage (like guitar would). And I know someone who's a really talented trained singer, and I know of at least 2 local choirs and an opera company who welcome enthusiastic newcomers. So I could get training for free or for barter (1 session with a massage therapist for 1 voice/music lesson sound fair?).
Who wants to spend the next 40 years wishing they'd done something like this? Not me. I may never take the stage, or read music flawlessly, or be a great singer; I can, though, guarantee that as someone with perfect pitch, experience of pranayama (breath work), and the willingness to learn, I could have a good time.
Pavarotti claimed he started with a mediocre voice and a great teacher.
It's a skill set I can brush up on. Just like ANY other.
I wouldn't have entertained this thought as anything but fantasy a while ago.
When I got really ill as a teenager, one of the things that happened was that my voice went from being strong and confident to weak, and I was just too ill and low energy to join in late night singing sessions.
Also, my memory was Swiss-cheesed, so I forgot lyrics.
Embarrassing!
And I went to college, and there were no "singsongs". And I moved away, and there were no "singsongs". My parents-in-law sing in the church choir, yet singing as a family was not part of their lives.
And I missed it.
Coming home on visits, there would be "singsongs", and I became more and more acutely aware of how weak my voice was, so I avoided the old "This is showingup 's song - come on, love, give us a song!"
I hardly ever sing now. Except... I've been singing my Guru Ram Das mantra for the past 20 days.
I realised that I "lost my voice" at around the time when the gap between what was expected of me ("You can achieve anything you set your mind to") and my experience ("I am not achieving, so I am a failure") was getting wider, and at the time I was coming to think of myself as unheard and not worth hearing.
Also, illness with me often goes right to the throat.
Interesting. But reversible.
Because I know someone who teaches music. And I'd really like to learn to read music and play an instrument that doesn't mess up my hands for massage (like guitar would). And I know someone who's a really talented trained singer, and I know of at least 2 local choirs and an opera company who welcome enthusiastic newcomers. So I could get training for free or for barter (1 session with a massage therapist for 1 voice/music lesson sound fair?).
Who wants to spend the next 40 years wishing they'd done something like this? Not me. I may never take the stage, or read music flawlessly, or be a great singer; I can, though, guarantee that as someone with perfect pitch, experience of pranayama (breath work), and the willingness to learn, I could have a good time.
Pavarotti claimed he started with a mediocre voice and a great teacher.
It's a skill set I can brush up on. Just like ANY other.
I wouldn't have entertained this thought as anything but fantasy a while ago.