Looking for Sarnath...
I'm contemplating the worth of discovering answers in life. I'm not talking about searching for the answers, but accepting any kind form of knowledge or wisdom that comes my way, whether I've searched for it or not. Does it even make sense to look for whats out there, and if we don't look, is it worth retaining what comes our way? if this life is about what comes after it, whats the point about caring for the here and now? Or is it man's underlying uncertainty of the beyond that forces us to learn? .....Just fleeting thoughts.
Still, I seem to be slave to love's mournful concerto. Life seems to of lost its mettle, and seems so frivolous. This isn't a cry for taking my own, far from it. I'm trying to say that life seems more lackluster than before.....Maybe its the inexperience of youth that still continues to speak for me.
I'm trying to stay on the right path, but its difficulty increases with each step taken. No longer is the path serene, no longer is it kind...I can no longer look and smile warmly under the orange sun, but I've gone way too far to stop now..."Blessed is he who resists temptation, for once he hath been tested, he shall receive the crown of life..." ....He must bear the stone, the whip and the dagger......
I just don't know what to make of things anymore. I can't feel my surroundings as well as before, I can't feel peoples hearts like before.....I'm guessing this is what happens when one "hardens their heart", but I never wanted to....because I've feared this happening. Again, I begin to feel like a single entity, instead of a broad spirit. I feel as if I can't empathize, that I can't understand. The wall I've worked so hard to break, is erecting itself once again. The only thing that truly saves me is the Earth. The gentle voice of nature is the one and only thing that keeps me whole. It reminds me of what my vision of life is: To see the beauty in all things, good and bad. No one enlightens like she. No one soothes like she....
....I guess I'll end here for now.
Still, I seem to be slave to love's mournful concerto. Life seems to of lost its mettle, and seems so frivolous. This isn't a cry for taking my own, far from it. I'm trying to say that life seems more lackluster than before.....Maybe its the inexperience of youth that still continues to speak for me.
I'm trying to stay on the right path, but its difficulty increases with each step taken. No longer is the path serene, no longer is it kind...I can no longer look and smile warmly under the orange sun, but I've gone way too far to stop now..."Blessed is he who resists temptation, for once he hath been tested, he shall receive the crown of life..." ....He must bear the stone, the whip and the dagger......
I just don't know what to make of things anymore. I can't feel my surroundings as well as before, I can't feel peoples hearts like before.....I'm guessing this is what happens when one "hardens their heart", but I never wanted to....because I've feared this happening. Again, I begin to feel like a single entity, instead of a broad spirit. I feel as if I can't empathize, that I can't understand. The wall I've worked so hard to break, is erecting itself once again. The only thing that truly saves me is the Earth. The gentle voice of nature is the one and only thing that keeps me whole. It reminds me of what my vision of life is: To see the beauty in all things, good and bad. No one enlightens like she. No one soothes like she....
....I guess I'll end here for now.