NOW

[shoujo_camui]

I quietly left my stone cave

I think I feel a bit less heartsick

I do not scare myself anymore

I have grown out of my hardships

I look at the sun instead of the moon

I won over defeat with a hard kick

I smile even when my lips quiver

I learnt to endure and slowly resist

I chose writing instead of weeping

I challenged depression warships

I move on with my brand new cloak

I now wear heavy layers of lordship

My hands are made of unbreakable steel

Though surrounded by trembling thunders

I often manage to stay firm on my heels

Tomorrow I might even be six feet under

I am constantly preparing my last meal

My mind no longer frets or slumber

At any second, I might face life’s ordeals

Each joy and adventure I shall plunder

I now control both struggle and repeal

Lately I am eager to satisfy a hunger

That once made me suffer and squeal

Yesterday I was prey, now I am hunter

Behold the one and only taking the wheel

My fists can make heaven burst asunder.

I cross the line when danger may linger

I bravely trust my armored confidence

I have frail fate wrapped around my finger

The sky remains as clear as my conscience

Destiny is a tricky musical, yet, I am its singer

I perform my miracles to exhale providence

Those years of torment are nothing but cinder

Neither failure nor loss can gift me diffidence

My invincible limbs make me an easy winner

I shall ever pursue freedom and omniscience

I married victory and swiftly divorced bitter

I no longer need pain to build my defense

I sewed enough vests to survive all winters



I will blindly swim through waves of reticence

Just to grasp the lost dream that still glitters

I will erase those yesterdays of ignorance

I want to keep watching the fearless birds fly

So I acquired wings to undo my flickering flesh

I can overhear the melody of clouds breeding night

I can smell the bees seeking flowers thick and fresh

I see the ray lights of morning insight burning bright

I promptly put down my precarious sins without protest

I marvel at the dancing trail of breeze which childishly slide

I sleep to develop my own shape deprived of deep regrets

Somewhere on a faraway island, I will not be able to recognize

The I who used to wear that distressed vessel of tacit threat

The one who carelessly left thoughts float and coldly collide

I am now ready to let the past properly heal and eternally rest

I will no longer avoid or abandon the tender poison of paradise

I have survived the ruins of what makes you miserably dead

The humming of the wind is the echo of awaited calming tides

I am now one with everything, breathing vitality at its best

I have forgotten the calloused I who refused to accept or abide

I’ve opened my teary body to other possibilities of quest

I am now able to battle against the dreadful end of times

To successfully ascend to the next level

I’ve endeavored to carve my spirit in immortality

I’ve created my inner circumstances to rebel

I’ve closed my eyes to stare at limitless finality

I’ve stopped running to at last find the devil

I’ve cast a fertilizing spell on my carcass of reality

In order to disappear I allowed my ghost to settle

I’ve fed on my own blood to seal my sordid brutality

There is no angel or demon I cannot fiercely wrestle

I’ve excelled to tame and control my feral mentality

I am now a powerful rose made of adamantine petals

My sharpest thorns drip oceans of inhuman tenacity

Now the world is a savage garden where my head nestles

Each minute of peace is a promise of blissful ephemerality.